My Journey

Looking for Rach and dottys diary to write on it, can't find it????

Can anyone point me in the right direction?

Hiya Sue

Thanks for the post , nice to hear from you not so nice with the reason , a big well done though for realising and finding the strength to post

Unfortunately there is no cure it can't be beat but we can make sure it doesn't beat us and that's exactly what your doing , you have the knowledge you know the pain it can bring and there's your advantage and you can make full use of it to better your life once again

I believe Rachael left the forum in January and had her diary deleted

Best wishes

Castle2

Sue

Welcome to the bar!!!

Sorry to read you have been gifting time to your addiction,it really is devious in it's laying dormant for periods and then sidling back into our lives at any given opportunity to reap it's destruction once again.

You know the drill,you are back in the right place,for me my advice is to put some practical blocks in place to ensure addiction does not get that redundancy,you have worked hard for that,don't gift it away for nothing but misery in return.

Regarding our Rach she and dotty are fine,she left her diary closing that chapter of her life.

You can catch up with her on Volcano's thread, she has loaned it recently to update how things are(you will find it on page 6)

Stick around,good to have you by my side.

Abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back

Thanks all, Will catch up with Rach on Volcanos thread...CHEERS Duncs x

Dear Diary,

I have abstained for so long and through a moments distraction I let you back in my life, well I now am able to send you back into the void that I do not want to go to again. You will not take all my hard earned money again...Jeez I wipe arses, clean up sick...and what for...a few highs on the slots. Hey when it's in black and white how STUPID.

What a freekin awfull addiction!

Sue

I could not agree more with those words you wrote.

The act of gambling for us the compulsive gambler is one that will only ever have the same final outcome

LOSS

I CANNOT WIN BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP

the mantra

You arrested it my dear friend,you have done the right thing,sort support,help and again I know your resolve will grow.

Most of all be proud of your honesty,a gift of recovery.

Learn from your short comings

I learn from mine every day

I never want to stop learning.

Together we stand.

Abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back.

d**n right Duncs, It's just plain crazy!

Don't know if it's good for me to count days but anyway I have gone 11 days, hell even 1 day is a bonus when you get the bug eh?

Have had the most amazing day today, something I never thought possible in the past. I went out for lunch with both my girls, For those who know me you will understand how special it was. My youngest daughter has brought her new boyfriend to stay with us. My god what a gent, he sat ther nodding and expressing a few grunts in the right place lol. Can you imagine me and 2 mini me's all trying to talk at once....too funny.

Gambling you can go and take a running jump!]

I need my family and friends...You are not included!

Womble xx

Hi Womble

Have been reading your diary and what a journey you should be so proud of yourself to keep bouncing back

11 days is great and I 100% agree with you gambling can take a running jump

Best wishes

Suzanne x

Hey Diary.....12 days...Did u hear that 12 DAYS.....Soz for shouting but I want the world to know!

I think people cope with the addiction in different ways, some short, some lengthy, some with substance....How does The Womble do it...Well Womble waffles...pull up a chair!

Work today again (making the most of it) woke up with sore toe, my medical dictionary told me it was gout. Phoned docs from work for appointment after hobbiling in front of the boss. No appointments...Ha but wait they offer phone consultations...Well Doc (who sounded just outa nappies) reeled of some funny word...anti bios and ibuprofen...well ibo brought on asthma attack........ Jeez dont they know asthma and iboprofen dont go? Calmed down now.

My wee one and boyfriend gone to meet big one and hubby......wish I was there to but work tomorrow (despite peading pain boss didnt bite)

Had a pretend interview with my boss and hr . They decided to interview me for co-ordinater of the service...Guess what....Got the job hands down. Hope in real interview same happens. Also managed to go swimming with service user inbetween......Gambling....Go Away!

Womblexxxxx

P.S. SA and I have an "our tune" and we have never met....LMAO

"SOMETHING INSIDE SO STRONG"

Yo,

Thanks for your post , not sure if I want to be as involved in this site as I was.

But read something this week that resonated with me and felt the need to post by way of soothing my troubles and hopefully supporting that person who seemed to be going through the same I was or still am.

Anyways good luck with the real interview . Your posts always put a smile on the readers face a quality which is sorely needed on this site .

So to end take care Hun, keep fighting the good fight !

Shiny xx

Hi Suze,

Thanks so much for your support.

I love reading your diary, you are so much fun!

I am glad you are doing so well.... keep on writing, it makes for great reading.

I read the first few pages and the last few and can't wait to settle down later and read your story. You have a great way of putting things that we can all relate to!!

The weekend is so different without staring at online games & bingo. So much better of course.

Lets all keep each other strong.

Have a lovely weekend!

Hi diary,

Woah we are onto day 13.

Sat in my room, listening to Magic..."you to me are everything"

......Bet you are all singing now!

Oh god "i want to break free" on now, womble loves music. I think music helps me cope sometimes. Funny when you actually listen to the words, sometimes it's as if some higher power is sending songs down the radio just for you. There is a particular song that just keeps coming on, weird ut it's a real old song and I think someone somewhere is trying to tell me something but for the freekin life of me I don't get it!!!!!! The song is "Chasing Cars" Snow patrol........Can anyone help me????

Where is Rach when you need her eh?

Oh god...How I waffle!

Worked today...Have only had 1 day off last week......So tired...But hey...So what...I havn't gambled!

My daughter and b/f gone to London to meet up with my lad, she really is making an effort for our family. Well if she can do it , so can I,.......No gambling .

Guess whats on now

"SEARCH FOR A HERO" (Inside ourself) thats about right!

Womble back again tomorrow after another day at work.

xxxxx

Hi Sue

13 days is good going keep holding on tight and believe in yourself

Gambling is a wAste of our lives and do we don't want to waste anymore

You are a strong lady keep going forward and don't let go

You can do this

Take care

Suzanne xx

Well onto day 14,

Not much from me tonight diary....so tired!

Got freekin' great horsefly bite on my head, eyes all swollen, looks like I have been beaten!

Very busy day tomorrow, taking service user to Bedford for a few days to his new placement, not got to stay with him. It's really hitting me now...All the service users I have spent time with for 17 years are going to be gone in the next 2 weeks....It's like my family is being torn apart.

Sorry for the negative post but am really feeling it.

On the positive side...No gambling!

Womble xxxxx

Hi sue

Sounds like a nasty bite no wonder you feel low

Good going on day 14 keep going and getting stronger

One thing I am learning on this roller coaster is my moods change like the weather and I am sure you will feel more positive tomorrow

I know I will never beat my addiction because it beat me it will always be there Sue at the back of my mind it's there all time not to gamble but the whole scenario

Of it all if you know what I mean

It's hard going as you know and I admire you for not giving in to the awful addiction

We have to stand strong it is the only way to go in the end

Why on earth do we want to waste any more money and time on a self destructive addiction You don't and nor do I

We are not for turning

Take care

Suzanne xx

Hi sue

I have to say I never thought id see you on here again sue. I never beat it. I hope you can.

All the best

graeme