My life with addiction

Hi,

Polite disagreement about the barriers question.

No longer relying on barriers may be appropriate for those like your goodself, in long term recovery. But for newcomers, barriers are vital long term support. Unblocked devices and unfettered access to cash respresents temptation to many CGs, why tempt? A lot of people in this forum are in the early stages, barriers help, why change what works?

CW

I wasn't suggesting people shouldn't have barriers. They absolutely should. But my point was people view them as the answer to their problems where as they are for the purpose of giving everyone involved a little safety. Does your own experience not confirm that barriers alone are not enough?

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CW,

No need for polite disagreement on this diary i believe.

In a fashion we're singing from the same song sheet. Yes, barriers are a solid foundation for recovery but you can also get lost with them in the funk of abstinence.

Everybody has to eventually remove the nappies to grow. Hence my point is don't get too lost that abstinence or barriers are the key to recovery.....

Hi Dan I can't fully get my head around abstinence and recovery can you explain a little more please. Are you saying people can abstain successfully for many years but aren't really in recovery because they never addressed the reasoning of it all. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing just interested.

Wcid

WCID,

My quick take on that is - If you locked a -

J****E/ alcoholic/ gambling addict in a room for a year would that cure em? I think not!

But as said before, its not always necessary to look too deep as the simple answer is sometimes at the end of our nose and i think you've found yours and will now grow further...

A good diary to high jack i think Dan!!

Hi Dan and thanks for your earlier post , I do let my emotion's flow now and boy do they flow! , all those years of not showing them I think has took its toll !. That man in the mirror is getting easier to look at though , as long as I don't stare at him to hard but his looks are improving !!.

Read a couple of earlier post's from today and I really don't think we can blame the betting industry for the way we are , you might as well blame mcdonalds or kfc because your fat ! , it's a business and nothing more than supply and demand , we choose to go in and eat or go in and gamble .

The placing of barriers helps initially but as we are all aware , if you want to gamble your gonna gamble and the only person that can truly stop that from happening is ourselves , our willpower and wanting not to gamble more than anything else .

You can do it but only if you accept the whole package of recovery , accept that gambling for you is over and to stop kidding yourself that you can control it , once you reach that total point of acceptance then the job's a goodun !!.

Take care of yourself my friend and those though provocing post's of yours !

Regards Alan

Hi Hl , GT I agree with you both but it is still buisiness and a very clever one at that , I do have a ;problem with the way it's conducted nowadays , particularly with the whole online thing .

Its created a whole generation of secret gamblers , who from the comfort of there own homes can bet huge amounts of money and I think thats the one that need addressing the most also the channels on tv , ITV and channel 4 showing live roulette all night , you still have to want to do it but come on ?.

I'm luck enough that I've never been interested in that side of things , old fashioned horses and dogs for me and that was always fine and no real problem but as soon as those machines appeared in the bookies, wow litterally a whole different ball game and never the same after that !

Internet , love it and hate it !

Sorry for hijacking your page Dan !

Hi Dan just had a check and we're back on the GA website as you said great news hopefully we can help someone who is in need. And we need new blood so to speak it stops it al going stale.

Hopefully this incident can be put behind us and we can move on.

Just a quick one. Met a guy last night. Had gone 23years & 3 months without a punt. Fell back into it about 18months ago. His story was a sobering one of how quickly& easily all the old behaviors returned. Addict for life. Never forget what your capable of. Remain focused & vigilant and life can be great. Think your cured & in control, think again

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Indeed a sobering reminder of why there's no room for complacency! I maintain, if I had a nut allergy, I would spend my whole life doing everything I could to avoid nuts...No point trying one to see if it will still kill me!

Thanks for dropping by & I get that all that rubbish could have sent me to the dark side but I was already well & truly entrenched in the mire by then! It's a relief to suddenly see that this isn't my guilt to carry but makes no more sense of where I started so I know I still have a lot of work to do! I will get there - ODAAT

Shooot,

A powerful few lines there Dan and very sobering, Makes more sence in the reasons why you stick with it after a near 8years gamble free..

Going a little off track, but read a few months back about a old homeless drug/ alcohol addict, who in his later years found recovery. Eventually after working his recovery he found a job, a home then a partner only to finally find out that he had a terminal illness. When asked whether he thought about going back to his old crux's. His answer was NO and without out any bitterness he was more greatful in what recovery had afforded him. A break through, he was now more ready than he ever was.

Sobering poke to us Dan, but much appreciated.

Suzanne xxx

Me again,

Been thinking while reading on here tonight (yea I do think sometimes lol)

Do you think some CGs have a blip,(not a landslide) because they want to just look back in to see how it worked, if that makes sense, to try and find one of the answers to this addiction, not blip because they think they are cured, or in control, just to try and find something out, for their selves, or am I talking nonsense as usual lol, and it's my addiction lying to me, think I have answered that one myself, as I am typing this, it's not even worth trying to find that one out, wernt sure where I was heading but it has just occurred to me total disaster, how cunning and conniving this addiction is, Don't worry Dan, I have answered this myself, sorry for rambling on your diary, but by asking you this question I have answered it myself, thank you for the use of your diary without your knowledge :))

Suzanne xxx

PS yep lost the plot, must be my age, :))

the concept of accepting i have no control and am therefore powerless is one i cant get to grips with. I see some others struggle with it too. It is counter intuitive to how i think about things in general and does that mean i am destined to fail ? I didnt want to hijack alans thread, and im not sure im ready to start a full debate on GA steps, as i have extremely limited knowledge. Is it therefore my ignorance and i need to go to lots of meetings or have many relapses before i will choose to admit this ?

I admit gambling crushed the person i was, i dont accept that im beaten yet ... if i continue to gamble i will most definitely be beaten... Do i have to reach a monumental low or series of them ... i.e try and fail in recovery (not real recovery if i havent conceded i am powerless) before i reach this stage ?

Hi Dan , Excuse my ignorance for a moment but I've never done anything GA related , so are you saying that because I accept that Gambling has me beat and that I surrender to the fact that I can't fight it , which I'm quite happy to admit by the way , thats why I'm finding recovery easier than others who are less accepting of those facts ?