My life with addiction

Hi V , sorry to hijack your thread Dan ! I too feel that I can't always offer support to everyone that posts and maybe that's being a bit biased but I tend to go with what feels right , if I think someone's just going through the motions I'll sit back a while and reserve judgement but if I feel someone's willing to put all necessary steps in place , they'll get my full support !

Hi Dan , I do agree with you in principle but what I wonder is that you've been in recovery for so long now and deepest respect for you my friend for doing that but do you not feel that youv'e become blurred if that's the right word as to how you felt in the first days of recovery , when you needed that arm around you and the words of encouragement that went with it ?

Apologies Dan but am off to work now for the evening shift , thanks for the verbal tennis and I hope we ended on Duece ?.

As long as you still put a cyber arm around me and say "There There" occasionally , I'll be fine ! LOL

Take care buddy !

Hi Dan jiggy and PoPs lol,

To put the record straight for me myself and I:) I post and give support on other diaries,

1 Simply because I want to help in any way, have done since I joined this fantastic forum.and because I simply want to post it helps me along with my own rollercoaster journey.

2 I do not tell the postists what they want to hear, I get the vibe from their posts and give my post back to what I think will help each individual, no I don't have the intellectual vocabulary, I use simple words that I hope will give them some positivity and hope to abstain and msntan, and committ to recovery.

3 I have not been to GA yet(as Dan knows) I have never had counselling myself, I have learnt everything so far from here, and I just want to give back what I have been given and I have been given 100% support on here from some lovely folk, but as I said that is me myself and I no fancy words that some folks that come on here just won't understand at the beginning of their journey, jeez, I just got simple honest support when I started my journey, and I will be forever grateful, if I had read all these deep posts I think I may have left this place before I started,

4 No judgements on here, we all know how hard this journey is and for those that do relapse, it's sn even harder journey to get back.

5 simples, treat everyone like you would like to be treated, with respect, especially where this horrible addiction is concerned.

6 Everyone is on different plains on here, so I post to that individuals needs, ! jeez you 3 are so intellectual, lol, and I am proud to be walking along side with you all, you are 3 guys, but so different to each other and yet have come together on here,

7 every postist on here that posts to me help me all I their different ways, because we are all different.

8 please don't bear a grudge with me guys:))) joke, , keep reading, posting and learning, this truly is a rollercoaster ride of emotions, and self discipline. not forgetting self awareness, what a fantastic ride, that we would never of had if we had not become addicted to addictions, and thst is soooo very positive for all of us.

Suzanne xxx

The best diary to high jack I think.

Suzanne, could you have wrote that post 600 days ago? No need to answer ☺ So my point is, you've both received and given therapy.

We are all the same but unique DNA'S as we seek my in word for the week a Perfect Circle.

ps, number 8, put a smile on my face.

Jiggy

Nope I remember exactly how I felt, attending 2 meetings a week & hearing newcomers stories & pain keeps it very fresh for me. What I remember is that I was an extremely arrogant man who believed I knew best how to manage my addiction despite a huge amount of evidence to the contrary. I used to lap up people who would tell me what I wanted to hear & would get angry & resentful at those that told me what I didn't. Nearly 9 years on I can know see clearly those that were really trying to help rather than help themselves

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And yes I get the irony of used to be arrogant & think I knew best. I am if nothing else self aware 😉

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Yes and I wouldn't want you any other way :))) you are you, we only need to change ourselves, if we want to change ourselves for the better we don't change ourselves to suit other people, I tried that one for far too many years,:)) and it got me no where:))

xx

Why do I get that feeling of someone just having had a dig at me ? LoL

Hey, you are one of the kindest and most sensitive people on here Alan, (after me ofcourse lol)

Xx

It wasn't a dig at anyone Al. It's not very well worded is it, can see how it could be interpreted that way, I would edit it, but try not to edit anything even tho the addict inside screams to rewrite anything that isn't perfect. Especially spelling now, know!

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And though, tho

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OK Dan , all's good mate and sending you a big cyber manhug ! , I nearly said cyberman hug then and Dr who has no place here coz he doesn't know about addiction , or does he ? . LOL !!

Have a good evening Dan !

Right you lot, enough of the hugs chaps & Blondie you can all have a little listen to me now...I luv (no I wouldn't have said that even a few months ago) you all & you're all right or is that alright 😉 Surely there is no right or wrong thing to say to us as addicts coz we just ignore what is staring us in the face anyway!

Seriously though, change is a massive word & whilst one person may choose CBT another ACT (or me just simply going back to basics with my ABC), for some people GA is what keeps them safe, others the men in white coats...This surely means that the tools are unique to the individual?

Shoot, now I've forgotten what all the other stuff was about! Bear with, bear with, oh yeah...My 1st few weeks were the hardest (so far), since then I've been drifting along on cloud cuckoo with very little interaction from my 'old friend'! I know some people have to fight everyday further down the line but going back to 'day 1' seems the most painful thing in the world @ that given time so surely time in sustained recovery is a bit of a healer?

Oh & for the record, I don't think relapse is part of recovery but how do you tell someone who thinks they're worthless that they do have the strength to carry on?

Hi Dan and yes I'm hijacking yer thread again , I knew my grandaughter would be along soon enough to spoil the manhugs , somedays it feels like you just can't get a minute alone !.

I'm not disagreeing with anyone on this because it's all about a person's choices , were all trying to recover from something that took control of our live's and really how it happened and what caused it is irrelevant , we all have different issues with gambling and equally different ways of dealing with our feelings and our recovery .

I think you really have to get your head around this recovery business and tailor it to your needs as you go along , our feeling's during recovery are constantly changing and we have to tweek and adapt our plan accordingly , moods change , urges come and go but at the end of the day it's all down to you , if your ready to stop then you will !!.

And Kelly , thats an awfull lot of abbreviations for one post , also have you noticed how Dan just throws something out there , starts the Rugby match and Bugg*rs off , I'm sure He's got a book from GA , entitled " How to just throw one out there and Bugg*r off " ? LOL, LOL !