My Road to Recovery

You sound like you've given this a lot of thought and honesty. That's a good start Mark. Have you thought of contacting Gamcare and asking about counselling or other options?

Great start Mark. Keep it up.

Hi Mark and welcome . Great honest post my friend .

I'm a fair bit older than you , but your story seems to mirror my own in some way's , I lost my dad to cancer when I was 19 , my mum a few years ago following a stroke and after a failed marriage have brought up my son since he was 13 .

Regarding your story , at 23 thats a huge amount for someone to cope with and a credit to you that you take care of your sister my friend , not only are you putting your own emotions and your life almost on hold , you then have to deal with keeping things running smoothly for your sisters sake . " I take my hat off to you sir !".

With regard to your gambling , do you not maybe think , " Its your escape " ? .

Youve had so many difficult things happen at a time in your life , where things should just be about fun and enjoyment !.

I know through finding out why I gambled , this was certainly the case for me , I just didn't want to deal with real life , the loss and the pain !. For me gambling offered a refuge , somewhere I felt safe , somewhere I didn't need to be the real me !.

Now I understand me ?, I'm able to deal with things better , they no longer overwhelm me and this has allowed me to stop gambling and move on , I don't need that crutch anymore.

Have you thought about any counciling, with regards what youve been through ?

You say your sister is your main focus and I can understand that and admire you so much for that dedication , but you need also to look after yourself , a bit of you time ?, after all your sis needs her brother just as much !.

I may be barking up the wrong tree here Mark but it could possibly make giving up the gambling far easier , once you find out the reason?.

Best wishes for now my friend and keep posting . Alan

Thanks for your posts and support gents.

Yes Alan this is probably one factor to why I gamble, but prior to my mum’s death gambling wasn’t an issue, I could control myself as it was small stakes etc, but from that I was a bit more felt under pressure and betting was my way of making money, but this wasn’t happening so I was constantly chasing losses, and no matter how much money I was winning it was never enough.

Betting did offer me my escape definitely, but once I was losing money I was getting depressed and uncomfortable to be around etc just throwing money away. Days which I have success or don’t even bet at all (not losing money) I was in such better form.

I honestly believe with enough mental strength I can overcome this problem.

Thankfully I have not bet from I have started these posts, and I feel so much better.

Mark

Ok Mark , you know yourself better than others , so well done on your continued abstinance from gambling .

Keep up the good work fella and best wishes for now ! Alan