Well done on 128 days
The lovely weather we have today is totally free, just enjoy it along with your amazing gambling free days.
Suzanne xxx
Day 130
Last couple of days have been good. No worries, stress free 🙂
Got a busy Fri-Sun with something everyday. Overspent this month and it's only the 8th day!
Some very real thoughts of gambling, real thoughts of putting money in a roulette machine on the off chance of easing my money troubles. Still got enough strength and knowledge to know it is pointless.
Keep going tears and building those days up because as you say gambling is simply pointless, we lose far too much, for the sake of a whim.
Great going on 130 days.
Suzanne xxx
Thanks Suzanne!
132 today.
Closest I've come to gambling is today, I've entered the works sweepstake for the Grand National. I've said anything I win will go to the charity we are supporting this year. I won't be watching the race so if my horse wins some money it's good for charity, if not I've still donated. Trying to take the gambling aspect out of my transaction!
Other than that no real temptation. Busy weekend ahead that will help with passing time.
Day 135.
Feeling pretty good about not gambling, had my biggest tempters over the weekend, after leaving the house with money in my pocket following an argument. Whilst gambling crossed my mind there was no real threat of it happening.
Money is still causing me stress, I have bills i need support with from my mum but have not had the courage to tell her. I'm spending as if the bills don't exist too so just burrowing my head in the sand a bit then reality kicks in.
Luckily I am taking great strength for the time I've not gambled, now approaching 5 months. I don't miss the stress of that one bit.
Day 136
Feeling much better today, any thoughts of gambling have disapeared for now.
Exercise really does help raised mood levels.
Not much planned today/tonight. Seen a couple of jobs which look interesting so might have a closer look at those tonight.
Day 138
Going strong, some really good moments of serenity recently. Perhaps I'm emerging from a bit of self lothing, anxiety and depression.
Whilst things have been so much better since i've stop gambling its been hard some times to find peace within myself.
I'm looking forward to the weekend even though the highlight is moving a sofa!
Almost nil thoughts of gambling which is nice. Will keep the guard up, no real testers until i go to the races in July. The it will have been 9 months gamble free so should feel even more confident by then, my best mate who organised it for a stag do isn't a gambler either so can spent the day with him having a drink!
Day 142
Lovely weather keeping my mood high! Bit of golf and a bit of running also helping with general fitness and peace of mind.
No gambling thoughts, absolutely zero. Not often I've felt like that, I was worried about money but when I discussed it with my wife it wasn't that bad at all.
Lesson learned, communicate with loved ones more!
Coming up to 5 months now, feels like 5 years in a way. The rock bottom place I was on 29th November seems a lifetime away, although the days seemed to have racked up fast, weird!
Hi mate,
Read your first post and your last!
Although I'm a lot less younger than you I can relate my story to yours. I started on horses. Tried lucky 15. Had a go with the dogs. Tried accumulator on a weekend and when nothing came in I turned to the FOBT. I'm onto day 4 and hope I can reach the same stage as you are now.
Your almost at half a year! What a great achievement. Keep it up!
T
Good luck annon! It can be done! It's hard and feels un-natural at first. After that it feels un-natural to gamble!
So up to 143 now and still no gambling thoughts.
A big day is on the horizon though and because of that I'm feeling stressed. I need to confide in my mum about a huge debt I have and need to address. I'm hoping she can help with the money situation, if she even has access to that sort of money.
If not I'll have to look at my options, the good thing is I have almost 5 months of not gambling which is a record for me. I feel in a different place than I have in all my adult life.
Both me and my wife earn enough to pay off the debt but extra debt we've accrued over the years makes it a bit harder.
Once I know this debt is covered, even if I'm paying it off for years, I'll feel so much better.
At the moment it's all a case of the unknown and you naturally feel for the worse.
Hi tearsofaclown
Thanks for the post in my diary
You're doing great
Day 146
Pretty positive thoughts today. I have my money worries but after having a close look at my finances I'm certain I can clear any debt pretty quickly. It's just a case of facing up to it and stop putting it off.
Trying to find a part time job to help bring in a few extra pennies a week. Don't really want to work in a bar/shop but thinking some sort of ebay career, an hour a night and a few at the weekend could be worth the work.
In the past I've done quite well with my little enterprises, just gambling got in the way. Hopefully with a clearer head I can do quite well.
Day 148
Told my mum today the extent of my debt and whilst she has been here time and time again she was willing to try and help again.
Nothing set in stone but she is hopefully going to be able to help me refinance and take away this burden a little which I've been carrying for a while.
In other news, I watched a film called 'Fed Up' last night which was a documentary on the amount of sugar in our diets. Really shocking stuff, hoping to get eating more home made/organic food in the future.
No thoughts of gambling again. Tons of football each week and I've not even thought about the odds, I did a lot at first but think I'm getting over that stage.
Just going to keep aware of any urges and not convert them into actions.
Day 149
Weird stress like feelings today, just came from no where but I told myself there is nothing to be stressed about and got over it.
My mum has been looking into the different finance options for me and is coming round tonight. It's not easy to rely on her or put her through the worry but hope I can repay over the coming years when I'm recovered both financially and from gambling.
Got a lot of making up to do to friends and family but also some making up to myself! It's been a pretty miserable existence over the past few years but already feeling miles better without the lies and deceit!
Those stress feelings do come and go, (it's the addiction trying to get in lol) and can be strong when when we feel good, and we have have enough money for the month, just tighten up more, stay one step ahead, the more days we are gamble free the more desperate it gets, lol, but we are stronger than it now, and wiser, just keep doing one day at a time ,
you are doing fantastic, be very proud.
Suzanne xxx
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