New beginnings!

Hi Lucy

Well done girl for staying gamble free even through difficult times you are facing just when you thnk you have this habit licked life throws something at you and yes we turn back to gambling as that is all we know I been in the same position about ex and her not wanting me to see my boys but life also has a habbit of sorting things out as I get to see my boys whenever I want as they now both legal age and can do wwhat they want just be strong girl life will turn around for you and gambling never sorts any problems out it just makes them worse so just for today I will not gamble

Take care and best of luck with the ex

Hugh

Good Morning World

First as always a huge thank you for all of you that have posted to me, it really means the world and i'm really sorry i have not posted back, i'm finding it a bit hard at the moment but i always read how your doing and keep up to date 😉

I'm still gamble free but i admit it was only because my card wasn't accepted in the week , a moment of madness came upon me but i 'believe' everything happens for a reason and as soon as the card was rejected prob because i am excluded from just about every bloody site on the planet the urge just went , i sat down , could not understand why and that is the biggest thing i fight , WHY? I know i can't bet even a few quid cause i can't stop but sometimes still think i can but anyway thank god i did not and again back to feeling strong and still determind to fight this f****r with all i've got!

Getting very anx still about xmas and work is really difficult at the moment, i always find this term the hardest, dark mornings , nights, young people getting excited about xmas and staff also stressed all impact on the behaviour so a tough few weeks left in the run up but i'm trying to stay positive!

The ex has stayed away which helps no end and the dating front , well lol you would not believe it if i told you but lets' say i am having the most interesting and fun time , nudge, nudge, wink, wink lol lol , wish i'd done this years ago lol lol

During the last 9 months my life has changed so much in all aspects, change is happeneing again now and things are shiffting in different directions and yet again i have to try and change my mindset, not rely on things or people i have but that is life and times change, i just must make sure i can accept these changes for the positive, be happy for people and also happy for me mostly because even though a couple of slips i am still so bloody sure i can continue to beat this awful addiction !

So i will leave it there today, a little more chilled than the last couple of weeks but still anx over a few things, i have money in the bank which if i gambled would not be there, my bills are all paid, i have a roof over my head, i'm healthy, i'm smiling most of the time and i'm starting to see maybe what others do now, i can look in the mirror and not see the monster i was, i now see a not quite so young woman but one that's not so bad even when times are tough one that will always try to smile as it not only makes her feel better but many others say it makes them smile too 🙂

Keep Strong all, have a great weekend and please remember gambling will never be the answer!

Smiling Lucy xxx

Lucy,

Well done you !!! Those blocks worked, for that be proud, and yes do "believe"

And that smile does bring one out in me too, for that thankyou.

You go get em!!!! Most of all enjoy the journey you sure did earn it!!!

Duncs stepping forward never back

Lucy,

🙂 Always always uplifting to see a post from you. Like Duncs says the barriers/blocks worked. I was talking about this last night and actually they are really just deterrents but they can be life saving! Staying strong in the face of adversity that's what you are doing currently. It seems you have plenty of good things going on too, these will give you additional strength in the coming weeks.

Have a great weekend,

Flagg

P.s Gamcare Live 2013 I will see the famous smile!!

Hi Lucy,

I'm back!

Not much to add without starting a book!

Soo happy to see you are still fighting the fight.

Lucy....I believe in you.....I believe in me!

Cant wait to buy you a drink!

Hugs, and more hugs!

Sue xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lucy,

Hi there, I am so happy that you weren't able to gamble last week. I am also delighted that other areas of your life have started to improve and you seem real happy, which makes your band of followers happy also. Keep up the good work. I hope those kids don't drive you crazy leading up to the Crimbo holidays. On a positive note, you must get loads of pressies from your pupils at Christmas. My wife used to bring home about 20 boxes of chocolates, which I used to love. She works with a far smaller class now, which is good for my waste line but no so good for my sweet tooth.

Tomso.

HI Lucy,

No matter what you have to say your posts always seem to uplift the forum as your courage to keep going oozes out of your diary.

You have faced so many challenges and changes this year and your stil here , still standing tall and more importantly still smieling. Well done you , ok the blocks may have saved you last week but actually i realised a while ago I couldnt do this on my own thats why we put them in place.

Im sure it is a stressfull time of year for you but you will stay focused and continue making and accepting those changes.

Wit woooo on the dating front lol.. Nudge Nudge wink wink.. Good for you girl.. Life is for living now go get em. 🙂

Take care

Blondie xxxxx

Hi lucy great last post and just wanted 2 thank you 4 being a great friend 2 me away from the forum this last 9 months and long may it continue a day at a time

Take care

Good Morning World

As always , thanks for your support, means loads

🙂

Well another week gamble free and that is such a good thing to write right now!

I'm trying so hard at present to get through the next few weeks , i don't want to gamble at all right now and even if i did i do not really have the funds.

I'm struggling so much with the thought of xmas and all the bad memories from last year but also because it would have been my wedding anniversary xmas eve and though i made the best decision this year in ending that i just want the rest of this year over so new years i can see it out with hope and knowledge that it's getting better and that 2013 is going to be my year.

Work is really difficult and my mindset is not too good so i feel i'm not giving it all i can but i had a meeting with my line manager this week and told her that actually i'm human too and that i have times when things are tough etc, she is new too me so does'nt know alot about me, i told her about this year apart from the gambling and that i am finding the run up to xmas hard etc so maybe they will start seeing that yes Lucy is just human like the rest and sometimes that smile does slip a bit but also know that it's never far away and i know there is always a young person who can put it back on my face.

You see it's a tough time of year for lot's including young people who only have the safety at school and are not really looking forward to 2 weeks at home for various reasons so i have to try and remember others rather than dwelling too much on my own self pity.

I hope if anyone reads this they don't think i'm on the floor cause i really am not but just feel extra vunerable at the moment and although my great friend always tells me one day at a time i really need this year to close.

So i'm going to try and get through this cause as i've said before there are many many positives in my life right now, i have a wonderful son, home, health, job,friends and now even a couple of dates along the way which does make me feel better that someone can see the nice person and not the monster that lurks beneath lol

So hope all have a good week and stay gamble free, i know i will not gamble, i have too much too loose and i know it would destroy me this time if i give in and i do not want that , i want to be happy and i can only achieve that by staying bet free a day at a time !

Smiling a bit Lucy xxxxx

Lucy.

Today I so understand your post, this month for me, has me on my full guard, last year, not so long ago I devistated december, badly, really badly it was the beginning of the end of my addiction ruling my excistence,10 months on, I know there is a better way.

To abstain and maintain.

Better tomorrow by deciding today not to take those odds, they simply are not worth the punt.

Duncs stepping forwards never back

hi lucy

carl

Hi Lucy

Thanks for the kind support on my thread I hope you have had a great gamble free weekend and are getting yourself sort for the Christmas break

Stay strong and just for today I will not gamble

Hugh

Hi Lucy,

Just read your last thread. I think like a lot of folks we all want this year to be over, count me in that too. I will certainly drink the new year in with a lot more hope than the last one.

Can also understand you taking a step back, think we do get a bit worn down at times.

You really are a remarkable young lady.......feeling such compassion to the young people you work with despite your own battles!

If only the world was full of more "Lucys"

Sue....who always "believes"

xxxxxxxxx

Hi Lucy

Understand how ur feeling as it is a tough time comin up and like u survival is the word , 2013 is gonna be a great year for many of us , whatever we will deal with it and make the right decisions

Take care

Castle2

Good Morning World

Oh i am happy right now , gamble free and for a long time starting to see that life is so much better esp as gambling is not in my life anymore

🙂

So Lucy's mad world is ever revolving lol

No thoughts at all of a bet, had to fork out alot of money on 3 new tyres but it felt good that i had no panic as the money was in the bank and i was not putting myself at risk cause i could not afford something important as they were pretty worn and the bad weather had me slipping and sliding but hey no more !

So each new thing that appears is being dealt with without the worries and it feels so good 🙂

A good but very busy week at work, my heart hurts that so many young people are in pain but by staying focussed and bet free i can give all of me to them and be there when they need it and i hope just by being there it takes a very small part of their hurt away knowing someone does care.

My son is on holiday with the gf and i'm so proud of him, i think about the times when i was in the throes and thank god that it does not seem to have effected him and i'm thankful for that.

I feel that Lucy is returning to where she was many years ago, slightly different but the sense of humour is returning even though the staff say some of the jokes are really dreadful lol

As for the love life , lol lol well i know i'm never going to be happy with the nice bloke and that for me a bit of a bad boy is where i'm at, maybe again it is that high that i crave that has me seeking this, i thought i wanted the normal but i like the excitment and have decided after going back and forth since september with one guy to give it a go for real, he knows i'm different and seek the highs but seems to understand me and has said it's the passion in all i do that he likes so for now i'm going to be content and take it a day at a time 🙂

I was not going to have a tree etc as i just want this year to end but i am going out this morning to get one, stop being a miserable cow and get into the spirit of xmas, after all it was about a new birth and i am going to see it that it will be a new beginning for me too 🙂

So plenty of hangovers hopefully over the next few weeks, lots of laughs, lots of hope and hopefully lots of love too and i can only get all of these as long as i remain bet free and that's exactly what i am going to be!

Keep Strong all and have a great week

A very happy smiling Lucy xxxx