One big hit and your addicted

Hey everyone,

I find myself today thinking about where my new life is headed, and what choices I will be making to shape the path. I'am looking at that in sober mindset now. I know soberity will now be a part of me for the rest of my life, and I must continue to work hard on that, and not let myself down. It's a rebuilding process of many aspects of my life. I welcome the challenge of remaining abstinent from my addicton, as I have learned this is the only way forward. Tonite is my group therapy session, and I'am looking forward to learning more and sharing my story. Thanks for all the continued support from others.

Chicagoguy

Hey CG ....Keep sharing your story ..as they say ..you have to give it away to keep it...recovery that is..

Have a good therepy meeting tonight and as always day at a time ...

Rach xxxx

Hello CG

Thanks for the support on my diary.

Your a powerhouse in the support you provide people and you sound like you're taking great strides forwards in your own journey too. I'm glad your getting so much benefit from your therapy and its good to see you getting clarity of thought in your life in general too.

Best wishes

Goodmourning everyone,

Last night I had my group conseling session. For the education hour of the meeting we went over the topic of "the relapse cycle" Relapse starts with the thought, which leads to the behaviors. Don't get caught in this cycle. What were your behaviores before gambling? If you engage in them you will gamble. Gambling leads to remorse, which may trigger new thoughts of gambling. Break the cycle at the thought. What positive thoughts can you practice? We're learning that when you have a thought about gambling, before you go to the behaviors part of the cycle, think about what consequences you will have and that will help you break the process. Also were learning about stoppers, when you have the thought of gambling. A stopper could be something like, reminding yourself how far you have come, how many days you are sober, your thinking clearer now, self-estem has improved, loss of money has stopped. Will be working on this topic for a couple group sessions, so I'll have more info to share on my intros forum under "chart of compulsive gambling and recovery"

(REASONS FOR GAMBLING)

* Need for spectacular success

* Rebelliousness and anger

* Freedom from dependency

* Social acceptance

* Escape from painful or intolerable effects

* Competitiveness

(RELAPSE SYMPTOMS FOR GAMBLERS)

* Critical of Gamblers Anonymous

* Exhaustion

* Dishonesty

* Argumentativeness

* Depression/self-pity

* Cockiness

* Believing it "can't happen to me"

* Omnipotence

* Expecting too much from others

* Letting up on dicipline

* Use of mood altering drugs

* Wanting too much

* Forgetting gratitude

* Complacency

I wish you all the best in your recovery process.

Chicagoguy

Great post Chicago they are very true statements hope your well

The bear

So not easy to avoid so many relapse symptoms in our daily lives but you are making a giant effort and achieving your goals, keep strong.

xxx

Goodmorning everyone,

All is going well, not many thoughts of gambling these days. My mind is preoccupied with my move which is coming up at the end of April. Had a nice lunch with my brother yesterday at our favorite new restaurant, runaways. Had my usual grilled chicken breast sandwich, which was very good. Went back to his place and chilled for a bit. If I end up taking the apartment that's coming available next month, I will be within a few blocks of him. I need to just stay focused on my abstinence and keep pushing forward. I'am very happy these days to not be all caught up in that craziness that my gambling addiction had caused me, life's a lot more peaceful and I'am able to look at everything in a much clearer way. I welcome my short term goal of 90 days which is right around the corner. I'am thinking of buying myself a nice watch on the 90th day of my sobriety as a nice reminder to my accomplishment, and when I wear it, looking at it will become a stopper for me in the relapse cycle. I'am also going to get that new fishing rod and reel I've been talking about. I hope everyone enjoys there weekend. Stay strong and remember one day at a time is the best approach.

Chicagoguy

Hi Chicago,

You are sounding better and brighter every day. I took your advice and put a picture of a new RV and a picture of a beautiful Arizona sunset on my mirror. Great idea about getting yourself the watch. You deserve it!!! Stay strong and I will too. -joanxx

Chicago,

I notice a real difference in you, which is a joy to see. You are doing well my friend. Keep up the good work.

Tomso.

Dear Dad,

I know I've made a few bad choices in my life, you've always loved me no matter what and stood by my side. Thank-you for adopting me and giving me such a great life, and loving me from the day you brought me home, as if I was your natural born son. Any time I had a problem, no matter how big or small throughout my life, you were right there listening to me and giving me your guidance. Sadly, your no longer with us in person, and I can't just stop by the house or phone you up to chat. I just want to let you know that I'am trying my hardest to get this one right! I'am not going to ever gamble again, and each time I start to think about going to have a play on the slots at the casino, I'am going to think of you, and gain strength from that, and stop a possible relapse. I hope all my efforts to abstain from this addiction have made you proud. Though, I have a long journey ahead of myself, knowing I can still reach out to you is comforting. Thanks for being the greatest Dad in the world and my hero. Love and miss you much!

Love,

Your son

Thanks for comments on my diary much appreciate it

Take

graeme

Chicago.

To achieve great things in life i learn we have to give and not always for our own gain.

You my friend go about recovery with a fantastic attitude,humility and you give unconditionally your support.

For this i can see you are reaping the rewards you rightly deserve.

Well done my friend.

Be proud and just for today make a choice to better your tomorrow.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Well done Chicago on your continued abstinence

Keep up the great work

Hi Chicago

Thank you for your continued support I really do appreciate it.

I have been meaning to write a bit longer post to you for a long time, your last post about your father was heart felt and it really shows the value of this gamcare site where people can open up their hearts and let people inside to see their pain and joy. I know it has not been easy for you but now your right on track and finding better things in your life. I kind of liken gambling to one of my favorite American singers track "Sky blue and black" written about 9/11 but still it somehow sums up how I feel.

Hope we can meet someday and I wish you well from the other side of the pond, Dark Place

Thankyou for writing so movingly to your Dad. Mine died several years ago and I identified with your thoughts of wanting him to be proud of you, which I know he is as you are doing a brilliant job both with your own recovery and the ongoing support you provide to others.

Waving from a wet and windy riverbank

xxx