Online slots...

Now I am concerned...volcano....how do you know about the g**P mask ! lol ....we don't want you boys replacing your gambling addiction with some pervy boys toys : ) lol

Maybe we should just stick to the cyber man hugs ? Nearly said the job in hand but sounded wrong in so many ways !! LOL !

Lol...it would have !. ...good to chuckle....have a good day x

I can't leave you lot alone for five minutes! To think Volcano claimed on my diary that he was shy.

I'm only jealous!

Glad we can have a giggle in the midst of everything. Jx

It's good to laugh Julie...well day 32 gamble free....all seems kind of weird really....not thinking about playing at all really....if an odd thought does occasionally pop into my head I'm able to say ..""oh. .no I don't do that anymore "" I hope this continues like this and the thoughts of playing get even less.....I know bumps are going to come as I grow stronger and face my future plans regarding my unhappy marraige...but at least I'm not being side tracked by those dam slots.....can begin to think more clearly....I know it's going to be very hard facing up to ''do I want out from marraige '' but at least I won't be running to the safety net of the slot machines.....so that's got to be progress...x

Hi loxxie well done on day 32 of being gf your doing amazing xx sorry to hear your unhappy in your marriage have been there myself with my ex hubby. Only you know if you want to continue or make a fresh start. I was with my ex 15 years and was only 16 when we got together and didn't know what I wanted. When I met my new partner I knew what I wanted and he's my soulmate.If you ever want to talk hun I'm here as I no how hard it can be. Take care hun xxxx

Thanks merc....it is so hard trying to ' know what I want "....if I'm titakyy honest it's never been right....together since 16...along came kids...bla bla. ....never paid his way
...always be struggling to pay bills...etc. ...he always had his boys toys....and his hobbies which took the money....in the early days I was happy playing the ''the perfect mum and wife '....just went along with it all....he's always been very volitile. ..so I just done the best I could....fast forward many years of good bits....but mostly c**P....I found slots....had a good win...cleared some debts...treated kids...then I fell in the spiral of another Winn will get me out of here...and we know the rest...I'm just sick of being un cherished and taken for granted....so the gambling became my love.....he is very controlling and that's why I won't tell him about the gambling because he would never understand ie even try....it would just be another thing to control me with and would give him more reason to be even less compassionate to me and punish me....if that makes sense.....I've for one son home who is 15....he's a good kid....but has no real relationship with his dad...don't get me wrong in not blaming hubby for everything....he does have some good bits....and any body looking in the window would think he was ok....arghhhh...so complex....running to slots was so easy.....I will get to a better place.....just can't see how at the moment....but it won't be sat on a slot machine x

I totally understand hun your life sounds so like me together at 16 couple of kids but the crunch came for me when he came bk from Iraq and started drinking being violent ect that's when I found slots. Just to relieve the everyday stress at home but final straw came one new yrs eve found out he was cheating on me I kicked him out new yrs day. Best thing I ever did and it's true nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors. Everyone thought we were happy but god far from it. If you do decide to go it alone yes it will be very hard and very strange, well was for me as the first time in my adult life I could do and say what I wanted without anyone to answer to. And like you say regardless what happens gambling won't help. I think your amazing hun doing on your own without support from hubby but you have this forum which has been a lifeline for me knowing I'm not going mad. I just wish chat was open longer as if having a wobble someone to talk 2. Big hugs hun xxxx

This post may result in me being whatever is the Internet equivalent of stoned and shunned but have you thought of using an online site like Illicit Encounters while you find your feet and think about what you really want? There is an argument that (much the same as on here) it is a group of people with a socially taboo problem who haven't quite worked out what to do about it. You may be surprised at just how many perfectly good and decent people find themselves in the same boat. I will now duck and run for cover. Jx

Hey Julie....I certainty won't stone and shun you for your suggestion....always open to advise and help....but at this time in my jumbled up life....I don't think I can be bothered with any more complications or pressures....lol...but never say never.....and please don't run and hide...lol...: ) xxx

So far today....it's been a good one...good lunch time trade...so that helps...can pay some bills tomorrow....and its half term...going to try and do couple nice things with my 15 year old son....he's a good...totally undemanding lad who has had a bit of a tough couple of years whilst hubby Been home battling cancer....and because he's so laid back I never made much of an effort in doing anything nice with him....so this week I will spend some quality time...doing something he would like to do....instead of having my face in the laptop....gee. ..that makes me sound like I've been such a c**P mum....don't get me wrong...he's always been fed...watered.. clean clothes...and never gone without any material things....but realise now that he has gone without my time....so will he giving this chap 100% this week....because I want to...xxx

Very glad you aren't hurling anything in my direction. If you do decide to check out that site, there is a letter "stories of an old timer" that makes for an interesting read. Potential misbehaviour aside, I think your plan for half term is just perfect.

Looking forward to tomorrow....nice things planned with son ...and will see daughters and grandchildren...so all good....ok so some problems may pop up....but I will deal with them if they do....not stick my head in the online slots.....so I'm the winner xxxcc

Hi Loxxie, you're doing great with everything going on and, as we have said before, get the gambling sorted and then you can work out a plan for the rest of your life.

My Auntie left my uncle after 40 yrs​. I went to visit her in her new flat and she had hardly any furniture and the place looked bare and lonely. I said 'do you get lonely' and I will never forget her answer: Of course I get lonely but it's different being lonely on your own to being lonely when you live with someone. I really admired her strength. That was 12 years ago and she is one very happy lady, and you will be too.

Wishing you loads of happiness xx

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Thanks Annie...been thinking ....it's almost like I'm scared to look forward to anything to much incase something goes wrong...even simple things like ...I've got a day to myself....so I'm going to put radio on full blast and spring clean....pre gambling days I would have thought like that....now I always think ooh...something may go wrong
..hard to explain....but wonder if it's tied in to looking forward to playing slots....and then looking...weird...if that all makes sense.....anyway... I am looking forward to today ....and I can't stop any c**P things that may happen....so what's the point worrying about them...lol.....any way...least my head won't be stuck in a slot machine xx