Out of the shadows

Thanks guy's.

Not so much as a victory per say
As its not my first time in the century club. In fact it's my 3 visit this year.
This is the time where I need to buckle down and push on.

I'm going to take a break from posting until new year.

Thanks to everyone who has posted to me over the past year

Have a great Christmas
Keep fighting
Deano

All the best for xmas and new year Deano.

Might not be your first time at 100 days...but hopefully it will be the last time.

Wish you well.
Damo

100 days? That's a long time...well done. I hear what you're saying about being here before. You and me both! You know, as I do, that this is the hard part now. Keep focussed. Don't listen to the devil on your shoulder if he comes calling. It feels to me that we're both in a different mindset this time round though. Your posts, your responses, your attitude....I can't put my finger on it but you seem different. Accepting maybe? Whatever has changed, it's serving you well.

On a side note...and not that it's any of my business (as if that's ever stopped me!)...I'm not keen on your diary title. "just another addict"...you're far more than that Deano. A good, caring, loving father. A man who loves and cares deeply for his wife. A son. A friend. A support. A hard worker. A person who is committed to change and who keeps trying his best. You're more than just another addict.

Have a good christmas. And don't forget to pop on to welcome me to the century club...again:)...in 9 days time.

KOKO. LB x

Deano, happy 100 days, well done and even though you made it this far before it's still an achievement. Best wishes to you and yours for a great xmas and don't forget my party on the 5th Jan were I will be 100 days x X

So now that's a picture of you walking off in to the sunset then eh ? Oh sorry ! you don't get the sun up there do you , I'ts that big orangey yellow ball like thingy in the sky that youv'e probably noticed on yer hols in Lanzarote ? .:))

Whatever your reasons bud there always respected you know that , so I'll just say Have a great xmas with your loved ones around and an even better new year in 2017 , the place is never the same without you but stay safe buddy and I'll catch up with yoiu soon :))

Kisses xx

Third time's a charm... Happy 100 days!

Cathyx

Congrats Deano. As LifeBegins has said you have probably changed your mindset to become more resilient and determined as we get to hate the effects of CG even more.

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Congrats on the 100 mate!!!!!

RA

Thanks for the post's and support guys means a lot

Deano x

Support works both ways Deeeeaaannnnooo. Respect x

Hello Bud :)) Thought you'd gone for a while ? Doesn't matter the love's always apreciated and right back at you old mucker :)).

Hope you have a good night at your " Brickies convention " , so what do you do have a few drinks and play " Jenga " only with concrete block's ? :)) .

Enjoy yourself old buddy and I'll catch up with you when your not here again LoL ! .

Kisses x

15 week's since my last bet..
Seems like a life time ago that I was sitting slumped back at the machine's. Hands black from shuffling coins. I still remember the smell of sweat when you gamble. It's not like the smell of normal. It's almost like fear has its own smell.
Somehow the relapse was needed. I couldn't except that gambaling and myself were done.
Now I realise I can't gamble again
Or it will end in disaster.
I can't say that there's been a light bulb moment as of yet.
Life is OK.
Im happy to just crunch days in at the minute.
There's aspects of my life I need hard work on.
I'm not very social at the minute
I haven't been for the past few year's.
I'm happy to just go to work everyday. Go home and repeat
But that's not a life it's a sentence
I've handed myself why I don't know. I used to be really outgoing
Now it's just a shrug of the shoulders and whatever.
A lot of my traits I saw growing up from my dad. He had a lot of time for other people. But not much time for himself.

Until recently I would think nothing of buying my family what ever they wanted. But would question anything I need for myself. Even working seven day's a week I questioned did I deserve to have stuff for myself.

The past month I've put my undeserved Ness to bed and I tend to buy what I want.
It feels good to treat myself
My gambaling tokens are now treat tokens. Money I'd never miss
Now I get to enjoy it with my family.

Morning Deano, what a great post and thank you for being so honest, I really get it because I have felt like that too in the past. At work I've always been good at my job, a hard nut really, I carnt be a shrinking violet and come across as confident, but outside work I would withdraw when I was gambling and it changed my personality. I didn't like myself when I was gambling and it sounded like you didn't like yourself either hence you didn't feel like you deserved treats. Your starting to like yourself again and you do deserve the treats, enjoy a lovely xmas this year with your family. I'm having to work the majority of it but New Year's Eve party for me and my family will be on the 30th December and I'm really going to enjoy it this year as I will not only be in the room with them but my mind will be too. Every one gets down at times whether you gamble or not because life is up and down but being gf helps you cope better. Speak soon and take care x

Nice honest post Deeeaaannnoo x

Happy Christmas Deano, love to you and yours.

Kylie xxx