2 weeks ago my partner tried to commit suicide, he has had a gambling addiction for 12 years and recently it’s got the better of him. He has succeeded for months at a time without gambling but always seems to find a way back.
I’m finding it so hard to cope with, I’m paranoid all the time. I’m scared to leave him alone for a long period of time, I’m petrified of him ending up suicidal again. I want to do everything I can to help an I am, I’m trying to get him up and active and the only thing he wants to do is play golf and football.
I feel like he’s not taken me into concideration since he tried to end his life, I’ve never felt more alone in my life. I feel like I’m being selfish by wishing for more from him at this moment in time. Is that wrong?
I feel like he’s forgotten I exist while I’m focusing all my time and energy on getting him better.
He doesn’t know how I feel, I’m scared of putting anymore pressure or making him feel worse.
Can anyone offer any advice on how to help me deal with this?
Hello Ab1001,
I am so sorry to hear about your partners suicide attempt and addiction. I can’t offer you advice on how to deal with someone who is having suicidal tendencies. I can tell you that you’ll need to get support for yourself. It’s traumatizing to be in a situation where you constantly have to worry about someone doing self harm. A gambling addict is probably one of the most self destructive, self centred people out there. In the midst of addiction they lose self control, even the reality of the situation.
for you to help him, you’ll need to be okay first.
Best wishes to you,
TF
Hello Ab1001,
Well done for posting on the forum and looking for some support. You have come to the right place, there is plenty of help available for you.
I am sorry to hear you have had a really tough few weeks. Those feelings of fear and worry for your partner are understandable. It sounds like you are feeling isolated at the moment, worrying about your partner and how he is but also trying to deal with this yourself too. That is a lot for you to be holding on to. I would encourage you to seek support from friends or family around you to help you through this difficult time.
You haven't mentioned if you have spoken to our advisers but it looks like this could be a good option for you. They are available 24/7 and are there to support and advise anyone affected by gambling harm. It might also be that some more regular one to one treatment would help you through this and they could refer you for that for free. To contact them you can call the HelpLine on 0808 8020 133 or use our Livechat.
You have done really well by reaching out for support here and it is important for you to know that you are not alone. We also have a chat room for people affected by other people's gambling on Monday's at 11.30am that you may want to attend.
In addition, there is an organisation called GamAnon who are a peer support network for people in your situation.
Please do keep posting on the forum,
Rebecca
Forum Admin.
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
