Hi all
I'm knew to all of this as many times I have tempted to try and stop gambling alone with no support and just relapsed within 1 day or maybe even couple of hours.
I've been gambling for many years but at first you dont admit you have a problem you just imagine it all as fun until you realise you've no money then borrowing money and lying to family and friends to get money to gamble.
This didn't happen to me until recently the lying and decent which made me look at life and wonder why am I doing this to myself why am I living my life being sad and desperate for money off everyone when my life couldn't be anymore perfect. I felt like I was cheating and even tho i wasn't but gambling made me feel that way.
But one day I just admitted to myself I looked in the mirror and got so angry with myself why am I doing this there's no benefits just loses, lies, friendships, no money, debt that isn't the way I want to live the rest of my life.
I want to be able to enjoy my salary not put it all on a game or repay my debts. I want to be able to treat my family children partner and even myself. Throughout alll these years I've let myself go without even realising its bizarre!!!
So something just clicked and don't get me wrong this first week has been horrendous lack of sleep, really bad shames, mood swings sweats urges to have a go but you have to tell yourself it's never 1 go that 1 go can ruin everything you have, for what? Why?
Absolute no good enough reason why, yes I maybe only 9 days in but its the best achievement I've made in a long time and I will keep pushing and beat this.
Sorry if I've bored you reading this but honesty is the best way to be when becoming gamble free. I can't even look at the TV if a advert comes on with gambling sites it just makes me angry and even more angry at myself for letting myself get in this position in the first place.
Anyway I would just like the thank the phone line gamcare for there support because when ever I've been unable to sleep or get a urge I just call then before you know it it passes don't be ashamed to call or speak to anyone, as we all do at first but it does really help.
I will beat this and so can everyone else!! We are stronger than this and have life's to live with our family and friends.
X
Well done@rhellis1991 on being gamble free for 9 days. It doesn't sound like much to most people, but to a compulsive gambler, 9 days is a long time. Every single day you make it through without gambling is an achievement and something to feel proud of. You can only take it one day at a time and you have taken the first steps.
You seem to be in a good mindset right now. You're aware that one slip up can lead to far worse. There are things you can do help, like join GamStop and download Gamban. But you've already taken the toughest step, which is to ask for help. The anger and sleepless nights will become less frequent as time passes, I can promise you that.
Good luck.
Well done, that's brilliant.
Well done, like you I have gambled for years and its this exact issue - I cant see how to "start" and break my habit!! Your post gives me hope! Good luck!
Fantastic post Rhellis - very relatable and honest.
Sounds like you've turned a corner - stay strong!
We'll done. I'm on 8 days and really struggling.
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