At wits end

Hi

apologies for the late reply..thank you for your posts above. I will definately heed the advice given. I am still hopeful that we will get there with my son. He is in a relatively new relationship and is desperate that his new girlfriend is not told of his addiction (he will tell her he says once it is well in the past and they have been together a bit longer). I have mixed feelings about this and have told him that if he lies or is caught gambling even once I will tell her everything. He knows that I will do this so my ultimatum is genuine. I do however want to give him this chance as he seems happier than he has been in a long time and I dont want to spoil this for either of them. He realises that if the relationship progresses she will need to know about his past so I respect him forr that. I so want to believe he will get through this but I am really scared as he can be very manipulative and is adept at lying. For now he seems to be in control and I have full access to his bank account. He currently only has some xmas cash and the odd £10 from me for haircut or food. He is due to receive JSA and hopes to start a new job soon. He says that he has been visiting the forums online and is happy for me to control his finances until his debts are cleared (this will take at least 12 months on a debt management plan). I cannot imagine a time when I will relax about this and feel that we now have a life sentance to cope with. Certainly reading other posts suggest that this is the case. Thank you for your support and especially to CGs you are brave and should feel proud for coming on here and trying to help those of us who have no understanding at all. I assume that giving something back is rewarding as the realisation of what you have put your own families through in the past must be a difficult read. I think my son is starting to appreciate this now by coming onto the forum.

Hi CW22 how is everything going for you and your son x wcid

Hi WICD- I have not posted on here for a long time. A family tragedy had taken over my life most of last year and although not resolved we are learning to live with it. My son has been fantastic, steady job steady girlfriend and no debts.all of that has changed in a split second when he has been to Vegas on a stag weekend- borrowed and lost £1500 plus another £1600 he borrowed from me for the holiday itself! His girlfriend was unaware of his past addiction ( we were niaeve enough to believe it was in the past!) now she has asked him to leave so he is back home with us- broke and unhappy . Gutted and cannot believe we are back here! I hope that you and your family are doing well. X