Hello - i'm new here

I have called them. I've heard nothing back. Believe me, I'm trying but I need help, not Dereck's voicemails

AND HOW ANNOYING IS THAT BLOODY CAPTCHA ON EVERY POST I TRY TO MAKE?!? It really is not helping my anger

Sorry to hear you are hurting Burko but have you taken the steps that Woodley suggested, either by going in & self excluding or calling the number he left you? GamCare counselling won't stop you gambling, you need to take other measures to make it harder for yourself to do so. A GA meeting would be a very good star...You go to them rather than being reliant on catching someone on the phone. Meetings & counselling complement each other anyway.

I understand the captcha isn't quite so difficult on tablets where you just tick, takes the guesswork out of it. Gambling affects our moods, you need to figure out how to channel your anger in order to use it to quit rather than it affecting your state of mind because you have lost. You're not useless, you're an addict & people getting to big numbers aren't preaching...They're proud of themselves as you will be when you get there, because you can - ODAAT

Dear Burko26,

Can you email us on forum.admin@gamcare.org.uk, with your name and postcode, and we'll look into your counselling referral?

Kind regards

Forum Admin.

Hi This isRML and Burko

I am the parent of a gambler so the anger that is coming from both of you is very familiar to me. I am not going to lecture you or judge you, just try and offer a bit of friendly advice. Entirely up to you what you do with it but here goes anyway. I think this is an awful addiction and it is one that makes people so frustrated, angry and helpless and also makes them hit rockbottom despair where you feel there just is nowhere to go. All that we have been through. However, when you hit that rock bottom that is the time to ask for help and you have both done the right thing coming on here where people will listen and not judge. You may get people saying how many days they have gone without gambling but that is the goal people are looking at on here, they are not bragging or rubbing people's noses in it - they are just showing that there can be light at the end of the tunnel with a bit of hard work. Remember most of them will have been as angry and frustrated as both of you in the beginning.

You both have different stories. T - yours is worrying as you have someone hounding you and I hope you get some professional help to sort that and then you can concentrate on your addiction recovery. I really hope you stay safe. I know it is not always possible - but if someone could help moniter your spending when you get paid and cut down on your easy access to cards that would help. There is lots of help out there with debt advice etc and people want to help but you also have to do a bit yourselves. And Burko you are not useless. You are one of many people who have been lured into this and it has all got out of control. There is no such thing as a useless person- that is your self esteem being ripped apart by the gambling - if you try and stay calm now, get yourself a bit organised and try a few of the things above and make today Day 1 of not gambling and keep counting the days your self esteem will start getting better.

I hope you do not think I sound like an interfering old biddy but do not like to think you are both struggling on your own.

Good luck boys - stop shouting - start smiling!!

Thanks Gamparentanon x

Forum admin wrote:

Dear Burko26,

Can you email us on forum.admin@gamcare.org.uk, with your name and postcode, and we'll look into your counselling referral?

Kind regards

Forum Admin.

Many thanks - all sorted now and I start next week. Again, thank you

I'm sorry for my Anger, I at least see some blue sky ahead now x

Full day on Sunday without gambling, a full Monday without gambling - including managing to walk past three bookies on my way home (that is 12 FOBTs!!!) and today has got off to a good start

Hi Burko.

Welcome to the forum. You will be in a confused and agitated state in the early days because the addiction does not want to let you go.

Like any other addiction a period of cold turkey is required and you will not do it with willpower alone. If you are just relying on willpower to walk past its highly likely that you will relapse time and time again. I cant stress that enough! It dosnt work if you are fighting this through gritted teeth with willpower alone. You need all the help we recommend. An alcoholic, smoker or other drug user doesnt just stop with the click of the fingers and gambling is the same

It may take a little while to sink in but you need blocks and you need someone controlling your finances. In a moment of strength you need to focus on what happened everytime you gambled and you walk in with pride and self exclude. Make sure they know who you are and you dont want to gamble again. That means everywhere you can think of locally and online

The counselling comes with time as you learn about yourself and how th addiction grabs hold. You need to understand addiction as a form of serious mind control.

One day you will look back and wonder why you gambled and if it was really you. That takes a proper recovery where you realise a gambling addiction is a mental illness. There is no rational thought to it. Thay are selling you a dream and you are hooked on the feelings of lucky clover. Your mind wants its dopamine and throws caution and your finances to the wind.

When you get some proper help and blocks you wont be counting the hours so much. Sure you may have feelings but you wont be able to act on them. The feelings then die away as you realise it was just a mugs game which was ruining you.

Best wishes from everyone on the forum