Struggling

It's very difficult Rose and we can all empathise with you. Have you called the Gamcare helpline yet? If not, call them and they can help you make an assessment and suggestions for change. Their phone number is in the upper right corner. Best wishes. 

@gerard-g  Thank you, I will certainly consider calling the Gamcare helpline

Dear Rose,

My heart goes out to you. I know what you are going through. I have been there as so many others on this forum have. A therapist I talked to years ago suggested I write a letter to myself to help me make the decision to recover. I would like to suggest that you do the same- it is very beneficial. Here is the letter I wrote to myself:

Dear Gerard,

So, you had a relapse. Well, OK, what's done is done. But why do you keep saying to yourself, "Why am I so stupid?". Negative self-talk is not productive. 

Remember when your son was little and got a bad infection and you took him to hospital? Did the doctor say to him, "Why are you so stupid?" No, of course not. He said, "you're sick and we are going to get you the treatment you need to make you better."

So instead of asking yourself, "why am I so stupid?" tell yourself instead, "I'm sick and I need to seek the treatment I need to get better."

Your mind does what you tell it. There are many recovery options available and you only have to make the decision to use them.

Sincerely,

your conscience

Maybe this will help?

Wishing you all the best.

Gerard G.

Hi

You should go to a GA meeting i think , it would occupy your time, also see if you can pick a hobby to occupy some time go walking and set yourself some challenges. As you know you won't win anything gambling it will just make life harder.

@gerard-g  Thank you so much for youf kind words and help. I've taken rhe first step and blocked gambling transactions on my bank account. I know it's not much but it's a start.  I will try your method of writing myself a letter becsuse I do always aak myself why I'm being so stupid wasting money on gambling.

very proud of you. Here's my favorite quote: "It's never too late,,, to do the right thing."

Hi

Life with out gambling helps us get focused on those things which are healthy for us.

I felt that by going to the recovery program I was doing it for some one else.

In time I went to meeting for myself.

You could say that I became a selfish person.

I was not willing to waste my time and relationships for some thing which was self destructive.

By attending meeting I would see and understand there were pains in me that were not healed.

By attending meeting I would see and understand there were fears that restricted my life.

As I exchanged my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits I filled my time and life with healthy worth while relationships.

For me gambling is very unhealthy.

For me gambling is very self destructive.

The recovery program helped me heal my pains, it helped me face my fears, it helped me reduce my frstrations.

The recovery program helped me stop wasting my life and my time.

The recovery program helped me have a healthier relationship with my self and with other people.

Please stick with your recovery.

Love and peace to everyone

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham UK