you are gambling away thousands and thousands...and consider the train track as the next step. I actually arranged to have counselling on the phone through here but it didnt happen. Didnt help that as soon as i knew it was a female and probably middleclass it wasnt going to work.
Desperately need help and to talk to someone who really knows what im going through.
cheers
hey man im here for you i feel your pain sometimes its hard to talk to someone about your problem who has never gambled a day in their life
no worries we can over come this
just wish i could talk to someone whos been there, done it and on a straight path. The counselling option on here wouldnt work for me.
Hi cleanslate.
The only counselling I have ever received was for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder after several armed robberies while working in betting shops.
After the first session I wondered how some woman who knew nothing about having a gun held to her head could possibly help me.
Five sessions later my problem was cured, and that woman made the whole experience enjoyable in the end, and I ended up looking forward to my next weekly session.
Obviously getting counselling for gambling is quite different but you have to give the thing a chance.
If you don't feel that after a couple of sessions it is working for you then by all means try another support channel, but you cannot just write something like this off without trying it.
It is not easy to take the initial step of getting counselling, but you clearly require some form of assistance.
Fair play to you for at least coming on here and making the first step in the right direction.
hi sunday
I understand your perspective on the counselling but i know how i am....if it is going to be a middle class female trotting out standard counselling lines...it wont serve me well.
I would be better to sit down with someone who can relate to me....whos been through it themselves.
They did call to arrange counselling before ( through here) and a woman called me, said she would call the next day and didnt. When she did eventually call back she arranged face to face which i was prepared to try but despite me anticipating it being local it wasnt. It wasnt acheivable for me to get there. Then i suggested phone counselling and she said yes but i began to lose interest.
Guess im probably asking for alot of something im not paying for but still...
thanks
Hi cleanslate,
I understand the points you make fully, but to me it just seems that you may be putting hurdles in place so that you don't have to start the whole counselling process.
I guess this may be totally natural in this type of situation, and I could be wrong of course!
I assume you must have had some form of counselling before for something if you are already aware of what may or may not work for you?
hi sunday
yes. It sounds like i am putting a hurdle up but yes, i once had counselling for another matter. On two occasions I started seeing a woman ( for counselling) and pretty quickly i realised what they said wouldnt affect me or enable me to move forward.
The one time prior to that i had counselling it worked really well and i was working with a man who i related to and respected.
it sounds sexist but its the truth.
If i was sittiing with a man in his fifties who had suffered gambling addiction and overcome it i would be listening and learning.
guess thats how i work.
cheers
Hi again Cleanslate,
Cheers for the explanation, I get it.
Is it not possible that you can explain that you have a specific request for the type of counsellor you wish to meet at least on the first occasion?
I am asking genuinely as I don't know if that is something that gamcare can provide.
I hope you have managed to keep things under control in the meantime.
Hey Cleanslate - I'm going to put myself out here as 'devils advocate'.
When we have a real issue with gambling and have reached the point where we are low enough to seek help, finally admitting defeat, WHY does it matter whether professional help comes from a woman or man? Middle-class, working class, or some guy in top hat and spats with a monocle and cane flipping a sliver dollar? 😉
If we admit we have a problem with gambling and then when 'free' help is offered we STILL try to argue why we can't accept it - that sounds to me like b******P reason to justify our addiction.
Apologies if I'm not dancing all polite around your post, but you seem like you're asking for plain speaking man to respond and read you the news?
Life is hard enough. Life with a gambling addiction is doubly so. If you then put conditions on who can help you with your recovery then... ?????
All the best, Molehole
HI Mole
I understand your perspective but i know i wont listen unless its someone i feel i can relate to. That someone would be male and been through it.
Fair enough then. That's totally your right. Each to their own recovery. I'm sure there's no problem in asking GG or Gamcare for Male only one-to-one counselling. We live in a multicultural society now, (Muslim women for example have female only swimming sessions at council pools, etc). So if you can only deal with a man, then that should be allowed too.
Either way, I hope you get the help you need and don't use the lack of a male counsellor as an excuse to continue gambling.
All the best,
Molehole
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