Hi all, I am a 21 year old student who considers himself a gambling addict. This summer i have watched myself lose 400-500 for the pure fact I had nothing better to do (Mostly online blackjack).
A history of depression runs through my family and I can feel myself edging nearer and nearer to having it with this addiction, mother, father and grandmother have all suffered depression with my mother being sectioned. Anyway I was walking home over a bridge and there was a Samaritans sign on the bridge (You know what it says I can't bring myself to say it). That's when it hit me. How stupid I've been how selfish I've been and how selfish id be if gambling ever did drive me that far.
I have a loving girlfriend, caring family and a good group of friends, this is the only time I have properly came out with anything like this, no one else knows. I just desperately need help. I haven't made myself broke or put myself in debt but this addiction is really taking over me.
Thanks for reading and sorry for rambling on.
Hi Kelvin - First of all, well done for realising that you have a problem which needs addressing. No need to apologise for 'rambling' - you have articulated very well what many of us here have or are experiencing. It's important to remember that you are not alone in this and that you'll find a lot of support and encouragement here.
Do you gamble online? If so, then the first thing to do is self-exclude from all the sites you use and also install some blocking software such as K9 (free). These barriers will go a long way in preventing you from accessing the sites and losing any more money. Although there is a sad history in your family of depression that does not mean that it's inevitable you will go that same route. However it is true that feeling low or bored or stressed often leads us to seek that 'buzz' we get from gambling or any other addictive habit. However as with all 'highs' the euphoria we feel when we win never lasts - as you have found out already winning is never enough and we soon find ourselves on a downward spiral of win-lose-win-lose. There is a saying here: "I cannot win because I cannot stop" which is so true.
It's good that you are not in debt, but there is no doubt that if you continue you run the risk of real financial hardship and the loss of family and friends. That sounds harsh, but if you read some of the stories on here you will see how frighteningly easy it is to get on that downward spiral. You have youth on your side and the opportunity to change your life for the better. Do this not only for yourself but also for your girlfriend and all those who mean a lot to you. Try to develop other interests - you say you gambled because you had nothing better to do - I doubt that. Even if studying does not appeal (!) try to take more exercise, start a new hobby, simply get out into the fresh air.
If you look at the '2014 Challenge' on the Overcoming problem gambling page you will see a lot of talk about 'Life music' drowning out 'Gambling music' - in other words, when our life and family become more important to us than gambling then that 'music' drowns out all thoughts of gambling. Have a look at the page - I'm sure you'd find it interesting.
Best wishes,
Joanna
In the age of the computer and the web the bookie has managed to get in to our homes and now mobile phones just look away and change pin number and self exclude it has got me twice I have self excluded from most bookies well done coming on here find another hobby otherwise your relationships will be ruined by your mood changes you wont notice gambling is evil it ruins your life and people around you but I had no gambling forum online when I was 21 I think you will be alright as your feeling guilt
Well I've had an alright week, and whenever I feel down I just watch videos of my team winning the da cup in 2013, cheers me right up!
Take it from someone who knows, stop now while you are still young - don't end up 41 and depressed.
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
