I no longer gamble. Is that positive or dangerous?

I get your point.

I think the most you can say is 'I'm not currently gambling' - as that's a statement of fact, right?

Anything else could point towards being 'cured' which is risky especially this early on.

Even 'I don't gamble' is a bit dodge - as addiction can operate intermittently and you're only 94 days from 'I currently gamble'.

I've stopped for 4.5 years but still have addiction to the fore of my mind. Not in the sense of it being a constant battle, far from it.

More an open sense of curiosity over what my addiction was/is and curiosity about the addictive processes underlying who I am. If that makes sense. Using my addiction to almost validate a personal journey of discovery.

So, rather than feel self-indulgent by looking inwards, i accept that addiction is a message, telling me there was inner pain i needed to address.

I guess there might be success stories were people banish all addiction from their lives. But this seems unlikely.

I see far more who think they're cured, try to start a new life completely separate from their addictive 'chapter' - then return having crashed badly.

It's not surprising - the 'chapter' is merely the chapter of an ongoing story and you can't declare a completely new person at any point. Or any attempt to declare a new person, is itself just another chapter, not a new story.

I don't get gambling urges, but those same escapist urges still show up in other guises -albeit in less harmful ways such as internet or a beer.

I can see it's hard to accept your addiction early on, as it's got this foreboding shame attached to it. But really, accept we must.

And if we address causes, open up, shame diminishes and it's just an aspect of who you are which doesn't define you.

Sorry quite a tangent there. A simple answer is, 'i'm not currently gambling but I'm a gambling addict.'

Lastly, try to see your recovery as a journey - and try to take a keen interest in your journey. As there's no 'end point' when you are suddenly cured - it's all just one big journey.

Best wishes

Louis

Hey Louis,

thanks for the reply, I saw it a day or two ago and have thought about it quite a bit - just couldnt log on properly to reply but you talk a lot of sense, congrats on the continued abstinance too!

Hi Dan addicted.

Yes the short answer is that you say that you are gamble free in recovery but you can never be complacent. A proper recovery will grant you the serenity to admit that you have been a compulsive gambler and that it may always be within you to some degree.

Now that doesnt mean that you cant control it and the urges dont die away. The urges do die away but I have been tested on days when I lost my gold ring or got really depressed when someone actually tried to bully me on a training course. On at least one of those occasions I thought stuff it Im off to gamble.....only something random to do with train times held me back.

I still suffer from depression but being gamble free makes my life much better than it was before.

With discussion I know the scenarios when I could possibly gamble again...depressing news and Im running away in a car...motorway service sation..... blah blah.

Im not saying I will gamble again but Im firmly focused on what triggered me in the past and that I am an escape gambler rather than an action gambler or money orientated gambler.

Im not ashamed and I tell peple with pride that Im not to gamble because I had gambling problems in the past.

A key point is that my blocks and monitoring remain in place as I am never complacent.

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

Hello Dan Addicted,

I think only you can answer the question your asking but my opinion would be you can tell yourself you no longer gamble, I do this myself and even tell people when the subject comes up. That being said I know there's many aspects to my recovery and there's many safety nets I've put in place to make sure I don't gamble again.

I will always be a recovering gambling addicted, I know i can't go back to gambling because it doesn't mix with my personality and my ability to become obsessed very quickly.

Also give yourself some credit 94 days is good going so well done!

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Hello Dan addicted. You've had some good feedback on this which hopefully will be beneficial. I'd just like to add that I agree a compulsive gambler will never be 'cured', and in that respect we will forever need to be on our guard. I get what you mean about reacting to life events - i.e. things that get us down or pi*s us off, or if we have bad stuff happening in our lives. It's too easy to retreat into a self-absorbing gambling habitat, like an act of anger of rebellion. But the trick is to be fully aware of the situation and talk yourself back to a state of defiance and positivity, knowing that gambling is a route to misery.

Instead, we have to focus on other activities, engaging pastimes and worthwhile ventures. Failing that, it's often necessary for a quick fix: A sporting activity, a few pints of beer, a tasty meal or time spent with mates or girlfriends.