23 and my whole life ahead of me

Hey cathal, sounds like you have the life you want, the way to keep that is not to gamble. Hard i know, urge is overwhelming at times but one bet and we cant stop. You can beat this, money is just money, love and family are what really matter in life.
All the best,

Tnsk

So basically my last attempt of stoping gambling has failed, I have now went to the measure of cutting up my debit card today so I can no longer use it online, the only problem is I have no money what so ever I told my mother about everything on my last relapse she was so dissapointend but she paid a few bills, And then I've went and did it again ive lost all the money in my bank and I've my car payment on Monday I'm afraid il loose my car now. I'm stopping today and this is now day one I didn't visit the site as often as I said I would but now I'm going to make sure I do every single day and anytime I feel the urge to gamble, I'm afraid of telling my mother I've relapsed as she's already at wits end with me and I think this may drive her over the edge. This is my thoughts at the moment and this is now day 1

I realise its not the money I'm after its the buzz of gambling and no matter how much I win or loose I just want to experience the feeling

Don't expect the feelings to just go away. They will subside but can come back just as strong, especially if you convince yourself you can have a little gamble.

It's worth counselling or G.A to understand more about the disease. Otherwise you just stop and start without making any actual changes to the way you think.

Take it from someone that started 17 years ago and has stopped and started ever since. I've finally managed 5 months away from gambling which is a record.

It's taken til now to be honest 100% with my family and understand that the money isn't what I'm gambling for, that I cannot win, that I will keep going until it's all gone.

Can't beleive it took me so long to realise but if I could go back to 23 I'd probably have saved a hunded grand, not to mention the stress and lies!

Do everything you can to nip it in the bud now and it will save you stress and money in the long term. GA, GamCare counselling, your GP can all help.

You're not alone but you have to make the effort to get the help. It's tough to beat on your own!

Good luck!

Thank you tears of a clown, I'm going to a GA meeting Monday night, I find it hard getting help as my parents are quite old fashioned and don't believe that it's an addiction they think its something that can just be stopped if I feel like it, they get very upset everytime they find out I have gambled and if I say I need help they tell me to wise up its a vicious circle but I'm taking it upon myself to go out and get help weather they like it or not as I've tried everything on my own and nothing has worked so far so I believe it's time for some help

My parents were the same to be fair. Give GamCare a bell as there were free counselling sessions near me. A bit daunting at first but then I started to learn more and more about myself and what was making me gambling.

Doctor can be good too. They can send you for different courses, I went on a stress class which helped for when I was feeling anxious.

There is help out there but it does take a bit of effort to get it. It's worth the effort though, trust me on that one!

Thanks for your help tearsofaclown I've been speaking to gamcare and have gotten a number for an addiction charity near me I just need to contact them Monday as they're closed today I really am going to fight it this time before there have just been empty promises

Got in contact with gamblers anonymous and will be meeting with them on Monday I feel good to be finding help as before I've tried it on will power alone and I don't think that's the right method for me

I have become such a liar to everyone around me they all think I'm doing great even my own girlfriend there's friends that envy my life to be honest I'd be happy to have my friends life's and have a dead end job with only pennies to spend at the end of the week as long as I didn't have this addiction I hate myself for it I'm a good person and would do anything to help people but in my mind gambling always comes before anything else, and I think that it's such a bad thing. I'm so scared of my parents finding out I've blew everything they have bailed me out so many times before and currently they have their own financial problems so I think this time when they find out they'll put me out, I know they will find out as I've missed direct debits this week and the phone will start ringing looking for money that I don't have and my parents will find out everything I'm so scared right now I've work at 7 in the morning and it's now half 3 and I'm still not sleeping, gambling isn't just affecting my bank balance but it's affecting my health

Hi cathal & welcome to recovery...Great to see you've had the sense to tackle this @ such a young age 🙂

Did you ask Gamcare about debt assistance? You need to phone & speak to the people you owe money to as burying your head in the sand won't make the problems go away! It's also time to stand on your own two feet, your parents bailing you out gives a green light to the addiction & letting it have the upper hand is not helping!

Great to see you are going to go to GA & I'm sure you will learn a lot there! I would suggest telling your loved ones (again) & showing them how desperate you are to beat this! Handing over control of your finances is completely embarrassing but it will break your Time-Money-Location triangle & removing just 1 stops you from gambling! Being in a lesser paid job won't change you, you'll still be broke & broken. Recovery will change you, it will let you be you & it costs nothing but a bit of hard work! It may seem impossible @ the moment, I thought that & I gambled longer than you have been alive but I am doing it & if I can, anyone can! Stopping won't kill you but gambling could!

Deep breaths & get through work (don't tell me you haven't gone to work on no sleep before) then you can sleep when you finish! If you haven't installed blocking software, do it immediately & if the urges come, get yourself on here...There are a lot of wise words across this forum, you may find something particularly useful!

Be strong, you can do this - ODAAT

So it's been two days now since I've last gambled I feel a lot different this time quiting than I have before, I believe previous times were empty promises this time it's for real, on Thursday I won two pound on a scratch card normally I would just go into the shop and get another one and it might be a strange logic but I have left it sitting in my car to show that I have stopped gambling and it's a physical object that when I look at it it will remind me how well I've done by stopping for some reason it's making me feel good seeing it sitting there and being able to just leave it there and not go and get another one, it's only two pound but as we all know two pound might as well be 2000 as when you start spending anything on gambling you just end up keeping going but if we stay away and don't give in and don't spend anything it will help us on our road to recovery

I had to meet with a guy earlier and where I parked was outside a bookies (the only place I could get to park) I really wanted to go in and make a bet but the thing that stopped me was seeing a man walk by with his 2 year old girl and he stopped left her outside and went in to make a bet, this sickend me at how he could do that it was right by a busy road and she could've got hurt this is something il never forget when I get an urge I hope to never be so bad that I would neglect a child to make a bet especially putting the poor little girl in danger.

Hi Mate

Keep going, and always keep you guard up. I went nearly 3 years clean, and have started again in the last year. For me its a cycle of the same events, this I need to break. You also need to find your triggers, and learn to controil them. Good luck and keep posting. PS - I have seen so many people (men and women) leave their kids outside bookies over the years its unreal. But the truth is they will also get caught up in the cycle, and see it as the norm. They will also have a high percentage chance of being a gambler due to this, but when you are an addict no body else matters, its all about you thats it.

Hi Dave thanks for listening and your words of advice.

i have now reached day 3 I did make a slight slip though I was in the chippy and put a pound in the fruit machine just out of sheer boredom waiting on my food, I still feel like I was strong though as I won a fiver and instead of putting it back in like I normally would I just collected it and paid for my food I know I gambled but I felt proud of myself for not playing on its a mixed emotion of annoyed that I gambled but good that I collected and didn't play on I still class it as day 3 as I accomplished something good, I know I can never gamble again so it shouldn't feel I've acomplished anything but I do because I walked out with a free dinner nothing to do with winning money, anyone who has read and commented thank you