29 and out

mr29

Welcome to the forum a place where you will receive a wealth of help,support and some great advice,all from like minded folk who by and large share a common goal,to eradicate the misery that they have given to themselves through their own compulsion to gamble.

The debt is there because you made it fella,you are responsable for them,one thing is for sure if you gamble you will only add to that debt.

The mantra we all live by is the same

I CANNOT WIN BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP

wins are never big enough,losses are chased with relentless raising of stakes until all funds are depleated.

You can turn it around,you can through making a choice to arrest the punt actually become a winner,ironic I know.

The advice that worked for me that still does today,waqs gifted to me on my first days recovery.

There is a triangle

Time-money-location

Take one away at all times and the punt simply impossible.gifting you the chance to re train your addled brain.

Self exclusion,block your computer,restrict you access to finances,do whatever it takes to gift yourself a chance to see what life without gambling offers,it will reward you and it is free.

Take all the help out there

Yes it will take years to repay the damage,but you made it,it is for you to fix.

Be kind to yourself

Most of all enjoy your self gifted 100% pay rise

Duncs stepping forward never back

Here's the bottom line for me - you are ONLY 29. You have your whole life in front of you. Don't wait until you are much older and have lost much more money before you take action.

I gambled compulsively for over 20 years and lost 600000 and ran up debts of 200000. I am 47 and will be paying debts for another 8 years. I only admitted my problem at 41.

Take all the advice you get on here and otherwise. Do what works for you. Not every compulsive gambler is the same. Don't expect to be able to give up overnight. Expect setbacks and deal with them. Dependant on your life in general removing gambling may give you a better life or it may only mean you stop losing all your money. But stopping losing all your money can only be good. Don't let yourself be like me and many others who continued to gamble for so many years before taking action.

Best wishes.

Thanks for your honest words captain. I know I'm 29 but it's hard knowing I have a family to support and my secret debt hanging over my head.

Dunc, thanks again for your comments. I always appreciated your words when I had my other user name Dean28.

I have had many diaries started in the past but always fall flat. I can't bring myself to read them as I remember when I only had 12k debt. What i would do for that again!!,

Well I have gone a day and what a depressing day that has been. Constantly thinking about all the debt I have racked up and thinking of a hard next 4 years!

I will pay it off but the constant thought of paying 500-700 each month could destroy me.

Help... Have lost 2.5k this evening. I feel like my life is on the brink, relationship hanging by a thread which is a result of my awful habit, even though she doesn't know. I feel like I am ready to use every spare penny I have on my cards and gamble the lot and go bankrupt. Don't know what to do. Can't do this anymore. Where can I go to try and kill this demon inside me?!

Hi sorry to read you have had a bad day, guess the thought of paying back the debt was too much and like me you thought "I can win this time I can pay it off", but even if you had won would it have let you stop? or would it set you up for bigger fall.

Its time to right off the debt, stop all your credit cards and start living, don`t let it get you down, I did that for far to long and in the end I pushed everyone close my away. Make your family number 1 and work number 2 and if after that you have time for anything else then come on hear, read and see what a differences you have made

Take care stay strong hope you follow you over the rest of the year

I'm new to this forum and have to say I was very similar to you a couple of weeks ago hiding my debt not knowing how it will end....a time came when I knew if I didn't come clean it will all end. I would say come clean and get counselling...people will understand that this is a demon that can take over you. Only 2 years ago I was in 3k now it's 15k. My thoughts are at this moment in time is that the debt is a small price to pay for happiness and to be able to be free. I may not be as experienced as the other users but over two weeks in and I feel a different person. Still in debt but happy!!! Strange I know but the money is nothing compared to life.

Thanks for your words. I hear you and know your right but this demon is holding me so tight. Can't tell my family even when I feel this down. Need to stop but don't think I can. At this moment I don't think I ever will. Bad night sleep wali g up with hot sweats and I still have thought of playing.

Mr29

I CANNOT WIN BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP

Fella for twenty years I lived by that mantra,I gambled all I had,I stole,begged,burrowed until I became so isolated and disillusioned that my mind simply could not function,I just became a hollow shell,I kept repeating the same thing over and over expecting the outcome to be different.

Utter madness

That is the compulsion to gamble my friend

Utter madness.

My advice talk to someone,you are not alone,if not family,phone the gamcare helpline,go to GA,talk to a pal

I hope that your compulsion doesn't break you like it broke me,but in saying that folk do say that with addiction you have to hit your rock bottom before you seek recovery

Gambling truly broke me,today I admit that without shame

Today the shame would come if I had a punt

Because I am fully aware of the results if I do

The mantra re-ignites

Take a deep breathe

Ask yourself the question

How much am I prepared to lose??

Be honest with yourself,the answer is there,you have to find it.

Take all the help you can get to do so

Abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back

Well I am still in a bad place and can't concentrate.

I have cancelled 2 credit cards which had about 15k available funds between them. At least I can't use these!

As much as I am in a bad way and feel sick knowing I have about 30k of debt I still have the demon saying to me to gamble until I go pop!

I have a feeling if my relationship goes down the pan in the next couple of days, will do just that, go bankrupt then see if there's any light after!!!!

Went to get some flowers for my other half at lunch. They went down well. Unfortunatley they cost for 1225.

Another 1200 wasted and then barred myself from the bookies.

This means I am barred from every one in about a 30 mile radius.

Now I ahve 33k debt. I HAVE LOST 10K IN A WEEK!!

How is this normal. I have to storm it at work every week just to survive, and that is for the next 4 years. I have excellent credit rating but soon I have a horrible feeling everything will come crumbling down! I don't know what to do. I need a fairy to come along and pay it all off. But first off all I need to stop playing. I never imagined I would be this bad. Advice please on everything, giving up, easier life, clearing debt?

Hey Mr29,

How are you doing now mate? I honestly have to tell you that you need to go see your doctor as soon as possible. You need to admit to the problem to someone in confidence.

The second thing you need to do is a one to one counselling session.

The first step is the hardest once you have done it you will be able to start doing something about this.

You can't keep running and hiding from this or you will end up the exact same as me. No house no bike no car no nothing. I see a lot of similarities in you as i see in me.

I am also 29 have a good job had very good credit rating however until you stop and face it you are on to a loser as its coming for you its just a matter of when it catches you.

Good luck and let me know how you get on.

Mr 29

I have thought about the place your at today and it made think should I of given the direct advice to tell your partner or not....well iv realised only you will know the right thing to do, I would just say be honest to yourself. I'm the type of person that has always dealt with things on my own. I cane to the conclusion I need advice and guidance. I am seeing a gamcare counsellor and have to say it's great....33k is a small price to pay for happiness just be honest with yourself first as to what you need....I intend to use this forum for the rest of my battle (life) and I wanna be able to call you mr 20 in a year and mr 10 in two years and mr 0 eventually...I maybe selfish but I don't want to be calling you mr 35, mr 40 and so on....my words won't change you but just so you know your not on your own how you feel.

Thanks yobeep. I would hate someone to be in the same position as me but good that there is someone my age to relate to. Do you have a diary?

Kl thanks also. I have to deal with this myself but will call the doctors for a chat. My problem is while the 33k is there I won't be totally happy. 4 miserable years!

I do feel a bit positive as had a great chat with a lady from experience as I was reviewing my rating. She said how excellent my report was and just tick along and keep my head out of water. This was after I was using the dreaded words like bankruptcy.

My main problem is I keep thinking of where my debt was and where it is now. Like going from 23k to 33k in a week!