Your diary Joan, your rules......
Another tune to whistle your way to work...
f***k the loan sharks, unfortunately it makes the world go round... Look what they did to yoiur song...
Ha ha good song Paul. When I was a kid I had a few Melanie albums. Back in the day when folks played records. Calmer now. Got through another work day. As much as I despise the company I work for I am really enjoying this group of trainees. Tomorrow and Friday then a week off. Skippity doo dah!
Joan.
My dear friend in my mind out of the darkest of situations we find ourselves in through seeking recovery we will always find light.
I salute you my friend.
Duncs stepping forward never back.
Absolutely true Duncs. Yesterday at the beginning of class one of my trainees announced that she had forgotten her book and all of her materials. The company gives each trainee ONE copy. In the past I would have chastised the poor soul for being irresponsible. I know. A real beeeatch. Today I am calmer and more patient with most people except for the occasional idiot and even then I have realized that anger is ok but cruelty is not ever ok. I'm getting there step by step. When I manage life's curves I have less bottled up stress. When I have less stress I experience way fewer urges to self destruct. Stress management is something to think about and work on..
Used to be that I would come home reach for the iPhone pull up a cartoon slot and play for virtual "coins". I told myself this wasn't really gambling. w*f was I thinking? Fives became tens and tens added to hundreds. Just for a chance to stare into a screen. A chance to run away from all of the petty aggravations of the day. Now I reach for the iPhone and tap letters that become words that become sentences that tell stories in this little cyber space. Not really thinking just letting anything that pops into my head fall out. Got through another work day. One more tomorrow. Not too bad.
Authenticity. Time to accept the person I am today. Be that person and not the one I think others want me to be and find the courage, strength and flexibility to make and go with changes because change is inevitable...
More. Acceptance. Accepting the person I am today opens doors and enables me to become the person I was meant to be.
New age drivel? Used to think that way. Thick hard skull and a fighting spirit. These are my masks. I have a better understanding of these words today. Authenticity. Acceptance. Practice, practice practice...
Acceptance. ..practice practice practice - love it Sis вє
Keep talking, i love reading your wisdom!
S x
Thanks so much sis. I'm feeling really crazy right now. Just have to hold on. No urges to gamble but, just feeling like floor is moving and the ceiling is falling in....
Breath in for 6, out for 8...Restarts your fight or flight so hopefully will stop those darn things moving!
1 breath - Corp klinger
2nd breath - Col Potter
3rd breath - hawkeye
Breath out - houlihan.
Now still....
Thank you both. Really, I mean it. Tears falling now but, no more panic... Jeez I'm losing it!!
How can you lose what you never had 😉 Too soon?
You've had a 'crazy' day of 'light bulb' moments after a full week of work, it's no wonder your world is starting to spin a bit. Can you find a way to hanker down & enjoy the ride to the 'new' you?
Keep it up and you'll get a hug 😉
I think you're right. Just feeling overwhelmed. Have had panics in the past. Don't scare me like they used to but, still took me by surprise. I'm gonna wrap myself in a blanket for now.
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