Angel From Montgomery

Judy, what a great last post! You definitely get a big clap from me!!! Keep it up gal!

Love, Stubbsy 🙂 x

Thank you Rainbows, Magic, and Stubbsy!!

Good Morning Diary,

LOL!! Some days I just wake up laughing. But, I digress... I had a great day yesterday went fishing for the first time this season. Caught plenty of rays but not one nibble. It was great being at the lake with noone there but P and me. Had a few strong urges to go to the casino yesterday and last night. Probably out of habit but, more so because I have money in the bank, I am happy and today is my birthday so, naturally I deserve to get slapped in the face. I saw through the contradiction in my own thought process and hit PAUSE: I breathe in discord and breathe out silence. I breathe in discord and breathe out harmony. I breathe in discord and breathe out peace. ZZZZZZzzzzzz. I'm falling asleep.. 🙂 Anyway, I'm doing well today. Have lot's planned today. P is waiting on me hand and foot. I'm queen for a day! 😀 I'm going back to the lake and taking my friends with me. We can all do this one day at a time. And, don't let anyone else try to tell you that you are not worthy because you are! -joanxxxxxxxxxxx

Yo

Have a good day Hun, you deserve it!

Shiny xxxxx

Hi Joan

Happy birthday , taking it one day at a time is the way make this day a special day with special memories

Have a fantastic day u really deserve it

Castle2

Hey Joan,

Happy Birthday! Hope you catch some fish today, I'am going fishing also, beautiful day. Have a great day.

Chicagoguy

Joan.

Just for today I will join you in celebrating, Why?? because you are simply worth it!!!

Many happy returns, have a wonderful day.

Duncs stepping forward enver back.

Happy birthday Joan

All good things to you this year ...lots to be proud of and celebrate xx

r and D xx

Happy birthday Joan!! ;0) xx

Hey Joan,

Caught 3 nice smallmouth bass today down at the river, beautiful day, hope your catching some fish.

Chicagoguy

Hey Joan,

My apologies for missing a special day yesterday. Belated Happy Birthday. I trust you had a lovely day.

I was just having a browse at your recent posts and I was really warmed and uplifted by the positive nature of your diary. It appears you are on a very even keel at the moment. Recovery can be a wonderful thing when we find our middle ground.

Wishing you well as always,

Flagg

Thank you everyone, for the birthday wishes it was the icing on the cake!!! xxxxx

Hi Diary,

I had a great day yesterday. I spent most of it with P out enjoying nature and taking in the sunshine and fresh air. It was probably the first birthday in over 10 years that was not spent in a casino gambling all day. Wow. I look back on that and now wonder just what in the world we were thinking? With the money we would have P i ss ed away we bought a brand new self propelled lawn mower and two beautiful cedar Adirondak chairs for the back yard. P prepared a steak dinner fit for a queen and I ate like a well... I ate alot. lol! With all of that spent there was still cash to spare. What the f u ck did we ever see in gambling?? I believe now, it was more about what we could not see in ourselves; potential, possibility, self worth, competence, self confidence, and success to name a few.. To top it all off I got a call from my little niece and that was the best present ever. Here's the thing. A life without gambling in it is possible. I am doing it. I was hurt pretty badly and was left thinking that I would always be the one looking at life from the outside in. I am not wearing rose colored glasses. Lol. Noone on the street who meets me would ever mistake me for a flower.. lol. I have seen my share and will probably see more before I go. I will always need to be on my guard against the assault from urges to take the bait and self doubt from within; and naysayers, haters, and emotional vampires from without. It is still for me all worth it because of days like yesterday. Don't let anyone tell you that it is not possible for you, because it is. One day at a time. -joanxxxxxxx

Hi Joan

I am so sorry I missed wishing you a happy birthday yesterday but meant to drop in during the evening but was poorly when I got home late.

Sounds like you had a perfect day, who would have imagined it a few weeks ago reading your diary but I am so glad it is all coming together. Sounds like you are achieving that balance we all aim for and making some really good memories.

Plenty more to make sitting in those chairs in the summer sunshine, I am so pleased for you, just wish I could magic away that nasty niggle but as you grow stronger and happier it will become so much easier to squash.

Just want to say thankyou for being there for me as well.

xxx

Thanks Rainbows

Hi Diary,

Actually it has taken me a little over 9 months to get where I am at today. And, just where is that? Home I guess. Where is home? In my own skin. Not sure if I could ever explain what it felt like having someone else define my boundaries for me. I was a whole person when I was born and then someone came and drew thier own line on me. I had no idea that all I had to do was reclaim my original boundaries. I had thought that I had lost something but, I hadnt. I no longer need to bury myself in layers of fat. I have sent the marines home. I can defend my front line from now on. I am one proud in tact fighting cowgirl -crone! lol. Anyway, it is time to move forward. Today is day 1 of better choices for healthier eating. If I say diet I will surely fail. So, now one day at a time I will do my best to make the best possible choices for my poor body that I have been beating up for the last oh, I don't know half century. I must have lost at least 1000lbs over the years but, I had always lost the weight for the wrong reasons. Today I do this for myself. No pressure no starvation just healthier choices. That's me today. Have a great day everybody!! -joanxxxxxxx

Hey Joan,

Fantastic post that oozes a growing sense of your self and what your worth, it's like watching a small tree grow into that strong sturdy oak which although battered sometimes by wind and rain it continues to stand and grow .

Keep taking care of you.

Xxx

Hey Joan,

Just wanted to brag to you about my fishing expeditions the last 3 days. I caught 17 smallmouth bass in total, yesterday was the best, caught 7, weather has been beautiful, except today were getting some rain. Hope your doing great, stay strong.

Chicagoguy