Attempt to stop gambling and get out of debt.

Day 14 today.

Wasn't able to post on this the past couple of days which couldn't be helped.

Need to force myself to make time

Enjoying the diary! You seem quite goals and numbers ortientated which is definitely my thing. I’m in a similar spot where I’m wishing the days away, when in reality I’m not, I’m wishing the debt and the S****y decisions away.

Just concentrate on living life and youll see the days rack up.

Thanks rugbyman. yeah I agree with what your saying. Hopefully once i get paid I can try to stop wishing days away. Its harder the now as I am relying on credit to get through the month.

Day 15 today. Havent been able to post on this properly the last few days which means my third challenge of posting every day was failed. But I didnt gamble so will accept it.

The last few days have been hard. If I am honest I have had the thought a couple of time that a quick gamble could make it easier. I have a purchase coming up- around £800- that I can't avoid. Basically a year ago when I was in a better position I made a promise to a nephew that if he could hit a massive academic goal I would buy him this item. I'm very happy that he went on and smashed the target and now deserves the reward (buy in august). I will 100% honour the agreement. A couple of times though I have thought that I could put £300 on a low odds accumulator and get to £800. I KNOW THIS WON'T HAPPEN. I will more than likely win then blow the lot plus another grand. I won't do it. I will set aside £200 on each payday and then either add the rest of finace it over a couple months. I'm not sure, regardless, I will buy him the item.

This has got me thinking of waht used to happen all the time which I am sure many of you are familiar with. Winning lots of money, telling your partner, agreeing to do such and such with the money and then losing it hours later. Having to go and fund what you agreed with your own money to hide the fact you blew it. Or winning a lot whilst at the bookies next to the pub on a night out. Spending lots on rounds of shots and bottles as you are up, only to go back in and lose it all.

Yesterday I was meant to buy the bottle of malt. Instead, I took younger family for a day out. Couldnt really afford it but s**t happens. Was worth it.

Next Goal- 18 days to pay day. Post every single day untill then. I will start posting a lot more often. As I have just clicked that I only started having thoughts of betting when I wasnt able to post on this.

Day 15 complete ! Productive Sunday.

What did I do today to prevent gambling and improve financial position: I did not gamble, I did not spend anything and I made big progress on a couple of sideline projects.

Grateful for: weekends. A mini holiday every week.

Day 16 complete. Did not gamble.

Short post today. Pressure for work project taking up spare time. Longer post tomorrow.

What did I do today to prevent gambling and improve financial position: I did not gamble, I did not spend anything

Grateful for: A project ending tomorrow

Day 17 complete.

Didn't gamble.

Need sleep.

Student101, keep going strong. It sounds like you’re doing really well. 17 days is no small achievement.

All the best.

Martin67, Thanks for your comments. All the best for your journey.

Day 18 complete. I did not gamble today. I am finding it harder to find times to have bigger posts on this but I do really want to try and keep this every single day for at least a few months.

I am struggling to feel happy with my 17 days streak. I know for others this is a big achievement. For me it used to be and I suppose it is good. But I know my biggest task is payday and because of this is I feel like my streak the now doesnt mean anything. Pay day is when I really will need to take it hour by hour. So many times in the past have I done a journal 20/30 days straight and a few hours after the money drops in my account I have gambled and then never write in the journal again. I really want this time to be different. I will probably post twice a day when it comes.

Anyways, with not gambling a few great things have happened. The biggest thing is my productivity has went through the roof and I really do mean through the roof. As I said I had a big project which concluded yesterday with an important presentation in front of all the managers and some corporate managers. With no thoughts of betting etc I actually focussed on the project and went on to give the best presentation I have ever given. My manager who is pretty young told me they were extremely impressed and was happy as it also made him look good. Today I was then basically given control of another three projects and asked to present them on Monday.

The reason Im chuffed with this is I am due a promotion soon. I was basically told once I prove myself capable of leading larger projects then the promotion and payrise would follow. This would help pay off debts and also prove spending my time on stuff other than gambling has great benefits. Plan to smash the monday presentation and then speak to manager.

One strange thing though my manager told me was one of the other managers had said they thought me to be a shy person and was surprised. Years of gambling did destroy my confidence and made me a very anxious person. I developed a few anxious ticks when speaking and I was living in constant distress. A couple weeks of not gambling and I can see and think much clearer than before. As I am writing this I am becoming much more happy with my 17 day streak so far.

On another productive note, I have made great progress with tasks and ideas related to a side project which I also put down to not gambling anymore. I ran something similar to this project years ago and only brought in around £40/50 a month. I soon lost interest as my bet sizes were 10x time this amount. Now that I am not gambling I have been able to think about how I could of scaled that Idea and grew the income. I wonder where I would be if I had spent all the time gambling on being productive instead.

On a more rubbish note though. I have noticed I am eating a lot more these days and have put on a couple of pounds. I need to focus on getting fit again.

what did I do today to not gamble and improve my financial position? I did not gamble. I made progress with side projects. However I did spend money on lunch even though I took lunch with me.

Grateful for ? World cup starting. I am actually enjoying sport for sports sake again. Never bet on international anyway so should be fine.

Day 18. Did not gamble. Great day again

Hi student,

your story is like listening to mine... Can i ask you which self development books did you read? Which were the best...

thank you

Hi newone, read far too many to list. However think and grow rich was the best, also would recommend the chimp paradox

Day 19 did not gamble. Bigger post tomorrow

Day 20 today, Posting early as will be out drinking all day. But I will not gamble.

Good week in work finished. I want to build a career instead of a gambling debt from now on. Put my time into that instead. Driving home from work and decided to stop and buy myself a bottle of single malt. I want to remember what it is like to spend money and not be worried by keeping it to gamble. If I do this enough then hopefully I will see that I never needed to gamble I could have been happy without it.

Also realised how much I have drifted from friends due to gambling. I still see them at nights out but no longer am I texting them during the week. This is my fault, so many times someone would text me and I would ignore it because I was busy playing roulette. I am now focusing on building these friendships up again. Arranged a few of the boys to go for food before going out later. Looking forward to it. Will be a little bit of gambling talk from them as world cup will be on but they know I am trying to stop so will not push me.

The point that keeps seeming to come up is "wishing the days away" because you are in debt. Wanting to be a few months forward. In theory debt is only a number on a page. As long as I am making good payments towards it should I really deprive myself of living. From now on I will scrimp and save during the week but will spend at the weekend. I also would like to put a little bit of savings together first, purely just to take the worry of emergency spends away. My problem is when I tried this in the past I always lost it. Hopefully really focusing on this forum will be enough to get me through the month. Once yesterday I thought about how a quick bet could make it easier but we all know that is a lie.

Anyways its 20 days !! this means 10 day review time.

20 Day Review:

What did I do well to prevent gambling and improve my financial position the past 10 days? The obvious is I did not gamble. I also cleared the betting screenshots off my phone. I had no big spends however I did spend money on going out to buy lunch etc.

What could I do better in the next 10 days? I will ensure I take lunch for the next 10 days. Hopefully get into a routine of eating better also. Definitely believe that excersize and diet improves mood massively.

What was great about not gambling the past 10 days? Starting to recover old friendships. This will result in me being busier in the future also. I also am making big progress on side projects. Only plans at the moment but can see the way forward in executing them.

What am I grateful for? This blog. It is basically just talking to myself most the time but it allows me to see my thoughts clearly and process any worries. As I have said before when it comes to pay day I will be posting on this constantly. if its 10 times in a day who cares. I need to get through it. Its time to move forward. I want to be a different person by xmas.

All the best people

Hey S101

We are neck and neck on 20 days (:

Totally agree on re-forging friendships, I have neglected mine so much recently. Basically if they didn’t ask me to go out within a few days of pay day there was no chance of me being able to afford nights out so I avoided them.

Stay strong and we can both get through our first pay day GF in a long long time!

Hi Leeds fan,

Thanks for your comments. Definitely! I look forward to seeing you post your day 100 at the same time.

Day 21 complete

student101 wrote:

One

Hi Leeds fan,

Thanks for your comments. Definitely! I look forward to seeing you post your day 100 at the same time.

Day 21 complete

Taking one day at a time but we’ll both enjoy our 22nd GF day tomorrow!