Back with a bang...need to find the strength to stop again

Hey Shaun , I can totally relate to the feeling tired , when I first gave up about 5 months ago I was drained all the time and it is because your so focused on recovery , it takes all your strength initially but will get easier on time as you think less about gambling and more about the future , keep at it fella your doing fine !

Thanks Alan, yeah that's how it is just nakered (working 10hr days doesn't help)

Tonight while walking the dog I nearly called into the shop to get a lottery, but as I was about to go in my head told me know, it would have only been £2 but it's gambling and I don't want that in any way shape or form so I just walked on home feeling happy.

Tomorrows another day and I'll work hard to stay focused.

Good for you Shaun , right choice mate . As you say it's only £2 but it means what you've already achieved has been for nothing and you'd be back to where you were a few days ago feeling pretty shi. try and on day one again . It's really not worth it buddy and if you want change and to feel a lot better about your life , you have to go through a bit of discomfort to get there , nothing worth having is easy but trust me when I say you'll love life without the gambling ! Keep doing what your doing and racking up those days , it will get easier ! Always here for support or a chat if you need it bud !

Day four....

today has been a good day feel very positive, I had two hours down time between jobs today, you can guess what I used to do well today I used the time productively sort emails, clean my van, sort tools things I wouldn't have even bothered to do while gambling.

I just had a read through a few post and one stuck out to me regarding FOBT's, reading that has given me a kick up the a**e to what iv been doing and it's true I can't bet because I can't stop no win would ever be enough and I need to hold on to this and forget about what iv lost.

Hope everyone is doing well and staying strong we can all beat this together.

Day Six....

today was a difficult day, my normal Saturday would be take little ones out, go home then go out on my own for a couple of hours, I would say to my self I'll just put an acca on...soon as I walk in you guessed it I would be feeding the FOBT's. Today I had to break this cycle, took little ones out and then went to have my hair cut this would have been an ideal time to gamble on my own no one would know, but I didn't I went and had my hair cut and done some jobs I needed to and you know what it feels good.

The only downside today iv been in a horrible mood and I need to snap out of it but it all goes back to gambling.

I'm trying my best and working hard each day to stay strong, I will do beat this addiction.

Sorry if iv waffled on tonight just needed to get it out of my system, hopefully tomorrow is a better day.

Well done Shaun.

Take care.

Feb.

Day 8 gamble free,

feeling really proud that iv managed a week and not gambled a penny, I have some spare money in the account that I wouldn't have if id been upto my old tricks.

Trying to work hard and get things back on track and do what's right that's why iv been a bit slow updating my diary but I do have a good read most days.

thanks for the support iv received pointing me in the right direction.

Well done on the 8 days Shaun sounds like thing are going well. Good effort at the weekend always a tricky time I always went in with good intentions but that never happens as you can imagine, what might be worth doing is SE from your normal weekend bookies I know it's not a solution but it's a bit of block that might make you think why do I have to go further a field

Keep up the good work and keep updating it certainly helps you and also helps me to read the days mounting up got you

KTF

Cheers Shaun for your post , It just really made me think about life , gambling and how close I came to doing the same and from your post I see you had those thoughts and many more people as well I would imagine , it's just a bit scary when you think a little more is all it takes to push anyone over the edge !.

There's just not enough done to recognise the danger signs or to look after those at risk , doctors just seem happy to dish out pills and say take these and it will all be better , such a waste of life !.

Take care my friend and thanks again !

Your right Alan, it's such a shame and if anything it's given me more motivation to beat this I really don't want to be in that frame of mind again.

Today has been a really good day no thoughts of gambling and no urges but it helps when I keep busy.

Iv been thinking about self excluding from all betting shops close by but just worried about stepping foot in one of hose establishments again.

Thanks KTF really appreciate your support.

Well...14 days since I last gambled, iv worked hard each day to get those thoughts out of my head and it's working. Iv had money in my pocket (stupid I know) but that money is needed for a project I'm currently working on but not a penny has gone on gambling.

Iv managed to get the money together for my bills this month by doing it the right way not chasing my tail around and I feel a lot better for it. I know this isn't me free from gambling and I have to stay strong each day. Sorry iv not been and updated my post and offered any support over the last few days just been snowed under but I'll make sure I have a read tonight. Best of luck everyone and keep up the good work.

28 days gamble free....

Iv not managed to update my diary as iv been keeping my head down and concentrating on getting over this addiction.

Iv taken the offer for counselling and just waiting for a telephone consultation.

At the moment I'm not sure what's going on in my head, iv been working all the hours I can and not putting my wife/family first but how can I tell her the reason why iv been working all these hours? Last time I stopped I opened up to her and told her everything and promised I wouldn't gamble again but I did and now I can't face telling her.

Anyway here's to another week and I'll put all my strength into it being gamble free.

Shaun

So..Tuesday was my first payday after stopping gambling, normally I would be looking forward to this day as if I had lost all my money the previous month I could then try win it back, we all know this never happened.

I mnaged to stay strong and put barriers in place to make it harder to get my hands on it and so far so good.

Im keeping myself busy with work next week will be the test as iv got the week off.

Anyway take care everyone and stay strong.

Shaun