Festina Lente

Yo,

Lol at you hanging on to the bed for dear life .

The question is .....

Do you or don't do .......

Do you go tomorrow doused in insect replant ,

Or do you risk it in the hope that the insects have not all legged , or winged it , and there will still be some to find ??

Have a great day out , looking forward to your next up date to see if there there was plenty of fun had by all.

Gambling .......... Black widow spider comes to mind ...

Shiny xxxxxxx

Hi Steve,

Thank u 4 ur post on my diary. It means alot 🙂

Ur last post made me smile, I am glad u and Maisie have been having fun 🙂

U r doing gr8 Steve, Have a gr8 day 2moro, I hope u have some protective wear lol

Take care 🙂

Hi Steve,

Thank u 4 ur post on my diary. It means alot 🙂

Ur posts still make me smile, I think u keep everyone smiling here so thanks 🙂

Have a gr8 wknd x

150 days bet free. For me this is quite an achievement. Never thought I'd get this far, really, really glad I did. Equally glad I found and used this site, it's helped turn my life around.

Just got back from fishing, you can feel Autumn creeping in, caught a 10lb + Mirror which was nice. Easing down now on the fishing, tonight will probably be my last for a while. I want to now concentrate on getting back into work. If I keep fishing then my focus will be happily elsewhere. I'll always be an all or nothing type if person and I can only really concentrate on one thing at a time. So for now, the fishing goes, loved every minute, from bitterly freezing nights to sunny days.

Haven't wore a suit in ages, apart from the odd funeral, shoes need to be polished, beard shaved (maybe), hair cut shorter. Just bought a swagger stick, first world war original to use in the classroom, I always was eccentric. I got used to teaching with crutches and a fine array of walking sticks, gave me a feeling of grandeur and kept the kids under a tight reign so the swagger stuck seems perfect, I may even convert my beard into a WW1 moustache, what the hell.

My head is good at the mo', I've had a hard and very testing 3 years but I'm back in the mindset, where I want to be. Wiser as well. I know with great certainty that I cannot be an occasional gambler, one bet will never be enough. The enjoyment I experienced from gambling was transient and never permanent whilst the enjoyment I now have through not gambling is permanent. Gambling makes me sick and I hope that this sickness stays with me for the rest if my (hopefully long) life. I've gambled most at my saddest and looked towards it as an escape from reality. It only shielded my responsibilities temporarily and made my situation even more desperate. I don't know what lies ahead, I do know that life can change and alter its course in an instant. Hopefully I'll be better prepared for this whilst appreciating these moments of clarity and somewhat control. Here's to the future.

Steve

150 not out and quietly, ever so quietly enjoying life.

Wonderful post Steve, just goes to show that we can turn our lives around and move on from this poison. Much respect to you my friend, your journey has been inspiring, and gives me hope that I too may one day be many many miles away from where I am now on my own journey.

Wishing you and yours nothing but the best in life

All the best

Cameron

Hi Steve

Well done on the 150 days , ur life is so much better now without, gambling in it so why would u want to go back , u now av a new lifestyle enjoying what life has to offer and can tell by all ur posts how much happier u r for it

Well done again

Castle2

Just think how you felt 150 days ago and how you feel right now.

And also how you will feel in 150 days' time.

Onwards and upwards!

NT

Yo,

Have this vision of your first day at school, kids walking in getting there first impression of the new teacher .

Bearded gent , booted and suited , cane in hand .

Not a guy to be messed with or our very own Mr Chips

What will it be ?

Loved your post bout the volcano , defo sums up that our addiction lies dormant inside us all, but if it errups it still contains the energy to as deverstating as the last time ......

Hope you will still find the time to post as much once you return to the world of the gainfully employed as selfishly I love reading your posts .....

Shiny xxxxxx

Well done Steve, you will make an inspirational teacher, your students are extremely lucky, enjoy,

John

Day 155, still ok, still smiling. Went to a school yesterday to pick up an application form, in the meantime I'll do supply here and there. So all going well, which I'm truly grateful for. My leg and back is still holding out which is brilliant, no pain, I can walk again. I'm still training, building up my strength and my body four to five times a week in the gym and pool. Whatever happens with work I feel I must keep this up. I still get the odd urge to gamble, it's not a lovely welcoming thought anymore, instead it's a bit like smelling someone else's f**t and you quickly waft it away. The urges, faint as they are, are only an echo of the past, they can't hurt me, only I can hurt me.

Just had a quick gander through the posts, I sincerely hope Sue and Charlotte are ok, it's worrying, everyone on here is part of a family, you can't help but worry. Whatever and wherever they are I hope they're safe and well.

Got to go, busy day ahead, remember what that great exciting man said (ken Barlow) 'we're all love.' nice one Ken, lover of a thousand women and the possessor of a smashing bouffant.

Steve

Hi Steve, great to read that alls good in Stegland. How far you have came my friend, a true journey of inspiration, determination and success.

155 days is a remarkable achievement, and I congratulte you on each and every one of them.

Still very early days for me, but slowly notching up the days, Im getting there:)

All the best friend, take care

Cameron

Morning steg,

You will always be steg to me even if you have risen from the dead now lol.

I am always happy to see your post, I would of loved a teacher like you, I bet the kids love you, i was always drawn to the funny slightly excentric teachers lol.

Hope maisie has settled into school this week ok. I laughed at you post on my diary whilst I was away, breaking your dads arm lol although inappropriate it did make me laugh, I once knocked both my brothers front teeth out on purpose lol.

Anyways enjoy your day and weekend.

Take care

Blondie x

Hi Steve,

Ur last post made me smile, u r doing brilliant 🙂

Ur strength and determination shines thru 🙂

I hope Maisie is ok 🙂

Have a gr8 wknd x

157. Treble 20, head downstairs for treble 19, a wink to the audience, a smiling glance at your opponent before sinking your last arrow into double top.

Anyway, all is still ticking along nicely, still in the middle of my application form. I hate doing them, it's been such a long time, I keep slipping into a coma trying to complete it. I should have kept on file my last form, all those years ago, but I'm not that organised or forward thinking. Or maybe I was and I've just forgotten where I put it, a safe place probably where I wouldn't forget, who knows, who cares.

Still no intention on gambling, it's strange but the longer you abstain the lesser the urges become and potentially the better your life unfolds. Only complacency, stupidity or an emotional upheaval which impacts upon my mental well being and creates a situation where I desire to self destruct can upend me now. If I stay vigilant and mentally strong then who knows how long this 'good time' can stretch too. Initially I wanted 30 days now I want 30 lifetimes and I'm not talking mayflies either.

Really enjoyed the last few days with Maisie, I care about her so much. Im Very lucky and I appreciate the time I'm with her. Not gambling in this respect has really helped. Gambling just leeches your time and money, your thoughts and plans, it takes precedence over loved ones and destroys relationships too. So pleased that for whatever reason this effort of abstinence appears to be working, for there have been countless times in the past when I broke my vows

Keep strong all, there are a lot of strong willed people on this site turning their lives around against all the odds. I wish you well, you're not alone, we are all treading the same path, albeit at different stages.

Keep patient, baby steps, one day at a time, Festina Lente.

Steve

Good Morning Steve

Just a quick fly by to say it's great to see you remaining strong and continuing to fight this addiction 😉

Get that application off or wait a while while the weathers ok lol lol , i'm sure when the times right it will get completed and those offers will start rolling in!

Keep Strong

Lucy