Givingup4good recovery diary

Is this now day 16? Was thinking about you this morning and really want to see you break your 17 mark.

Keep strong.

Bluebella thanks. Yes today is day 16. Have all the usual temptations. But keeping myself busy. Hope your doing well and thanks for keeping me in mind. Big day tomoro matching my previous personal best. Looking forward to going past it then every day after is a pb

Sometimes in life, something just catches you in a moment and I think you achieving this and going on to a biger success will mean a lot on this site to many people. If it helps, my urge is non-existent today. They also say that 21 days is what typically breaks a habit so that is a good milestone to go for. I've reached it and would be great to see you at that too.

And? Did you make it? I do hope so.

Made it bluebella. Day 19. Looking forward to this habit breaking 21st haha. Thank you

Just keep it going now. Im on day 11 myself.

As mad as it sounds, your quite lucky, You have realised you have a gambling problem and need help before you got into serious Debt . I seeked help when I was so far into Debt that I had no way out. Don't go down the same path as me.

Good Luck.

Congratulations on getting to 19 days. That's a big step and well done on beating your previous best.

Having gambled my way clear of debt, I can only assure you that it is a temporary repreive unless you take major steps to change. When I was out of the red, debts gone and "back in control" (totally wasn't), I thought I could just revert to being a normal punter like my pals. Big mistake. £20 is never just £20 when you have a gambling problem. I've self-excluded from more sites than most people know existed; at one point I was betting on such an obscure outfit I had to explain to their livehelp people what a double was...

...the point being that you should put some real blocks in place because there are always more sites out there as you're finding out. You got lucky this time; I've been there and wish I could have stayed there. I hope you can.

Well done. Small steps. If you manage today not to gamble that is enough. One day at a time, just keep on that focus.

Thanks for the posts guys. Horizon I get what your saying and I'm going to do my best to take your advice.

Fed up of living the double life that many of us have led and going in and out of debt. Time to focus on the good things in life.

I've actually found that since stopping gambling I sometimes feel like there's no enjoyment in life any more. I know that sounds strange. I'm not depressed. I work in mental health and I'm quite self aware. But it's difficult to replace that rush or buzz.

I'm trying to keep myself busy so my mind stays off gambling and believe me I'm busy. I work and excerise, am involved in volunteering and community groups, on top of seeing my other half. Maybe I'm just unhappy with where I'm at at the minute. I think I'm always striving for more or for better and gambling for me was the hope that 'the big win' would provide that.

Anyway... There's a bit of how my stupid head works for yas.

Thanks for the input and advice and good luck with your own recovery and journeys. I'm confident that with the support provided to each other here we can all make it to lives without gambling. The comments people leave here really do echo through my head when I get urges and have definitely stopped me from gambling again more recently.

thanks a lot

Hello stranger, it's been a while! Just read what you said about 'enjoyment' & I completely understand! I still don't know exactly what I was 'striving' for as I have money now & it turns out it wasn't that but I'm getting used to the 'calm'! Maybe it's not your head...It's just a gambler's head?

I'm wondering, now you are out of debt, if you ever told your loved ones like you said? I also agree with Horizon, you need to get proper blocks in place as willpower alone is a hard way to do this! Don't kid yourself that 21 days will be a miracle cure...You will get there but this addiction is brutal & you will need to stay on your guard forever!

Keep fighting - ODAAT

Hi ODAAT. I haven't told my loved ones about how much I have been struggling. I'm so pleased to be no longer in debt and that my money is my own. But I feel like I need to get at least from one payday to the next before I come clean about how bad I was for a while there. I will tell them. I just want to make sure I stay on this wagon before I rat myself out for the idiot that I have been. Suppose I just don't want 'all eyes on me' from everyone around me. I know they'll be supportive but I seem to be doing ok for now.

Even just writing that makes me feel like I'm copping out from something there... But that's where I'm at at the minute.

Day 36 Tomoro. It's great looking at my online banking and not seeing any gambling related withdrawals. Normally it's hard to spot withdrawals for shopping or bills between all the online gambling withdrawals. Long may it continue because I would like to save for a mortgage some day and want my credit rating to improve. Posting because I'm so tempted to gamble on Tomoro nights champions league final. I've a bet in my head which I'm telling myself is a sure thing and I should bet on it. I won't though. I know myself even if it is a sure thing and does win I won't be able to stop at that. I've been off work all this week too and haven't gambled. Keeping very busy has been the key for me. That and I had some emergencies which needed paid for. Stuff I wouldn't of been able to afford had I gambled. So I need to be tight with my money. Normally I'd gamble in the hope of making money to stretch further but we all know how that usually works out.

44 days and I've slipped. Back to day 1 ffs

Opened a new account on a website I've never ever heard off. That's how many I'm self excluded from. Before I knew it I had my blinkers on and went through 400 on a credit card. (Didn't even put it on my own card because I'm so determined not to have gambling come out of my own account) my stupid head thinks it's ok to pay money off a credit card. What sort of clown am I like. Anyway I've stopped. It's bedtime for me. Don't even know why I've done this. Boredom? Or just plain stupidity? It's not life changing money but I'm worried now it's the start of that spiral I often find myself on. 44 days. The best I've done. And now self sabotaging it and what for I ask myself! Anyway I'll self exclude tomoro. Night

It's a blip, pick yourself up, reset the counter & get straight back into recovery! Only you can stop this being a spiral of destruction! Not sure if you weren't allowed to exclude today but if it was a case of leaving the door open to 'recoup your losses', slam it shut & fast! Don't be the mug I was throwing thousands of pounds away chasing! You don't need me to tell you that any money spent on gambling is bad whether it's yours you have already earned or stuff you have to pay back (with interest)! It's not a stupid head, it's an addict's brain & you did it because you believed the lies the urges told you!

Well done for stopping yourself & well done for coming straight here 🙂

Keep fighting - ODAAT