Going to keep this thread now!

Hi Freda,

Thanks for your support as ever, you are great! Hope you part-time job comes to fruition, sounds ideal for you, would be nice to have a bit of good luck for a change.

Hope you are well and catch up with you in chat soon.

Be good.

DT

I feel a bit frustrated with my online counselling session this evening. The counsellor started to introduce some ideas about what i need to do, in the last few minutes.

I didnt understand what he meant, and felt really confused but the session ended before he had a chance to explain.

If im honest i feel a bit angry that im left with this confusion for a whole week! I understand that they have to be strict about sticking to the 50 minutes, but just wish he'd introduced these suggestions a bit earlier in the session or not at all, if that makes any sense?

Saying heres what you need to do...bye! is just stressful for me. Im going to be confused all week now.

Im not saying the counsellor was wrong, but i am just left feeling angry and confused which isnt very helpful.

Im going off to have a cry now.

Will be ok though, just confused.

Feel much better now. Was a lovely chat, warm and friendly.

I guess I put a lot of hopes on my counselling, so its easy to be disappointed. I had an awesome therapist back in the day - sometimes no one can match up to that rapport of someone you built great trust with.

Today I did not gamble - 8 weeks baybeee!!!!!!

Freda,

Hope u r feeling ok today, understand your issues about counselling, it is really hard to find someone you trust completely and get on well with, keep trying, there will be somebody there who you hit it off with.

Reference to chat last night, was absolutely pi**ng myself at one stage, enjoyed it, cheers me up no end.

I am guilty of putting too much pressure on myself and am trying to learn that one day at a time is all we can actually do, hope one of your interviews comes to something.

Knock em dead buddy.

DT

Am still poo-ing myself about my interviews this week. Funnily enough, Im not nervous of interviews at all, Ive always been great at smarm! I know I give good interviews.

What Im nervous of is trying to cope with a job. As i mentioned in earlier entries, Im so sensitive its ridiculous. I get really frustrated, and get upset easily. Since my nervous breakdown a few years ago, Ive struggled to cope with a job. I find it really hard to bite my tongue when someone is rude to me, but in most jobs that happens often.

I get really anxious and depressed when Im unhappy in a job. I just hope I manage to look after myself a bit better this time, and not worry that im not good enough. I always worry im rubbish and will be fired. If I can cope with a couple of days a week it will be enough for us to manage on for the next 6 - 12 months.

So scared! :-/

Hi Freda,

I hope your interviews run smoothly for you and you give a good impression. I relate to what you say, I am quite a sensitive soul as well. I think the greatest challenge of working as part of a team in most jobs is precisely what you say. Often its not the work itself ( though it can be that to) but working with our collegues. And most of us don't have the luxury of being able to pick and choose who we work with.

From what you say i'd imagine that in many ways your actually a good employee to have in the right sort of role. But also like you say, coping with collegues with different characters and agenda's is the challenge. I guess the serenity prayer runs true. Finding the courage to accept the things we cannot change.. or.. in terms of work.. Finding the courage to accept our collegues as they are. When you may feel like shouting at someone whos behaviour you don't like... pause to think.. is it really worth potentially losing a job over. Most of the time it isn't.

Of course none of this is easy. Ive learnt the hard way myself on several occasions but I like to think that bit by bit I am becoming older and wise... peraps 🙂

All the best in recovery... S.A 🙂

I hope things go well for you Freda.......or its off to comedy central for you and DT !!!! 🙂

It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not. ~Author Unknown

Take Care

Stay Strong

Kim xxx

Hi Freda,

Hope your interviews go ok, you can do whatever you want to do, schmooze em to the point where they have to give you the job!

I am not the best person to give advice on this but here goes anyway. Sounds to me as though you are almost talking yourself into a situation that entails getting one of these jobs, starting and then being upset by a new colleague in some way or another and then giving up. The only reason I am saying this is because if you go in with that attitude it will happen at some stage, probably sooner rather than later. If the attitude you start with is completely different, ie.positive unless something really nightmarish happens, I think the outcome will be a lot better.

This sounds massively patronising as I read it back, but I'm gonna leave it, because I don't want you to talk yourself out of a job that you can do blindfolded that will also help your recovery self-esteem so much.

I have struggled massively with work based confrontations in the past, each one to my own detriment only, why are there so many wan*ers out there eh? If I had remained calmer and realised that it doesn't matter that some people are ****heads I wouldn't be in the pickle I am now.

I hope you get want you want freda I really do.

DT

ps.think i'm reading too many positive thinking books, so just tell me to do one if u like.

Freda,

You didn't offend me in any way, just wasn't in the mood for chat, will try and explain better another time.

I know what a potty mouth is by the way, I live with one!

Hope your interviews go ok.

DT

Yay! the interview went well. The manager said if it was just up to him he would hire me today, but they have to go through the hr department and get the thumbs up from them first. Reading between the lines, I think I've got it, but cant be sure.

I was over the moon with the people - sometimes its hard to tell how people are when you first meet them, but sometimes its obvious. They all just seemed lovely. Im really sensitive to atmospheres and it was a really positive one.

Its not even a fancy job. You'd think it was the way ive been going on, lol. It will do me nicely for the time being though.

Im so relieved! Phew! will find out for sure in a couple of days, but put it this way - they asked what size uniform i would need.

Great stuff am really chuffed for you 🙂

I'm sure you will enjoy it.

Have a great weekend

Love

W xx

thanks W, tried to find your diary but you mustnt have one!

Well bit of a pants morning. Had a job interview at 9am, and wanted to still go as havent heard back from yesterdays interview for sure.

So dragged myself out of bed at 7.30am left the house with plenty of time, walked to the bus station, waited 5 mins for the bus (which would get me there 15 early) cant say fairer than that?

Bus arrived, got on. Went in my bag for my purse to find it wasnt there! Not enough time to go home, back to bus station, wait for next bus and turn up 15 minutes late - so had to let this one go.

Frustrating as I should have checked I had my purse before I left the house - but how many of us are on the ball at 8.15am on a Saturday morning? exactly.

Everyone makes mistakes. There will be other interviews! Am knackered now 🙁 Takes it out of you nervously speaking, two interviews in two days with the second one first thing.

Am looking at the ironing, but strangely remaining seated....imagine that!

Hey Freda.. well done on the interview from yesterday! Sounds like its in the bag. A steady job with nice people sounds great. Take care and keep safe.. S.A 🙂

P.s I know what you mean about being senistive to atmosphere's and ones immediate surroundings. Am just the same. I consider myself an HSP.. highly sensitive person. An interesting read if you pop the words in a search engine.. just a thought.

P.s again... we posted at the same time.. so of course my thoughts relate to your previous post. Sorry to hear about the bus episode.. these things happen. Take care.

Feeling very positive today 🙂

Its my 4th anniversary with R. Woke up to find a gift and card at 7.30am, awww!

Hes at work all day, but cant wait to give him his present tonight. Got him a spurs shirt, his fav team.

Had a good workout this morning and been working on my project to hold a coffee morning next month for MacMillan Cancer Support. Feeling really good about the ideas I've come up with 🙂

Happy Anniversary !!!!!!!!

Have fun at your coffee morning, such a GREAT cause xx

Enjoy your evening 🙂

Take Care

STAY STRONG

Kim xx