HARMONY !

Yo,

Just back from the hospital with my dad.

Sort of mixed blessings really , this was his 5 month check up.

His sight has deriritrated more but we already knew that. The consultant felt the time had come for him to see a support worker. Which is sad but it something I have been trying to get him to comes terms with for a while . If he can get the help now , it will give him the tools for when his sight goes completely . He understands I will do everything I can to keep him in his own home , but sadly to do this he will have to give a little , and except strangers getting involved in his life.

So although slightly sad that we have now reached this point , I feel that we are moving forward in getting him to accept help.

Other than that , the drama this morning continues but have put it to one side. What will be will be and there's nothing I can do about it.

So alls good really ,

I shall take my own advise and keep on keeping on .

Shiny xxxxxxxx

shiny,

First and foremost can you please turn off the tap!!!!!! Lol left home this armed with my bike and a t-shirt lol by lunch the heavens had once again opened and continue to pour!!!!

Great post this morning got me thinking more again you are soo right we cant change our actions by doing one thing and also if we do one bad thing we should remember the good things too !!! as we know and have worked out I feel through bonding on the forum with groups is we are certainly not bad people,what we are is people in recovery, we look at things in depth today not to tear it apart but to better it or at worst get the best from it, this is something i try to instill into my kitchen brigade every day and it does seem they all find it hard to *****. I enjoy my recovery for things like this shiny because I do know that the ultimate result will make life, my life and as a result those around mine better for today and in turn for sure tomorrow will benifit equally at worst if not more, to end I think the same is happening to you my friend so as you say Keep on keeping on!!!

duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi shiny

Couldn't agree more with u what's goin to happen is goin to happen and we av to deal with it. It puts a lot into perspective really it's a great reminder that we still av a choice regarding gambling and should really appreciate that choice unlike today for ur dad the choice is taken away

U may be harmony now but u still always make me think differently and that's always a good thing

Thinkin of u today , take care

Castle2

HIya Shiny....had some time to read and ponder and hope i'm on the right lines here ...

You are right insofar as we cannot control peoples perceptions of us...and no matter how we change or are different sometimes people will only see us in one way.

Its that part of the serenity prayer again..accepting the things we cannot change and I always add on in my head (like other people).

I had an auntie that stopped talking to all the family for two years because we once gave her her birthday pressie in a M and S bag and not wrapped.

Anything we did before or after was like teflon...didn't stick ..as like an elephant she never forgot.

Its like mistakes...if we are living properly we will make mistakes but as much as I know i have ,,will and do make them ...I hate for anyone to have anything "on" me so I too overcompensate all the time and go to elaborate lengths to explain my motives and give over and above.

This is where masking comes in as I feel the need to be on top of everything ...not in a smug better than way...just so I keep my own standards high so no one has anything on me.

The energy it takes to keep that whole show going is immense.

One thing i learned from this over the years....no one likes to be around 'perfect" people...as it shows up their inadequacies...I kind of went through this in my 20s when I came across as always perfect.

I couldn't understand why people wanted to hang out with the ones who foooked up all the time....but i do now...as they couldn't relax around me.

Not sure if this is way off beam but Im still thinking about your post there..

Fact is ...people who love you love you warts and all and any guilt we may carry has to be forgiven by us and not anyone else.We have to forgive ourselves for not being perfect but being human and sod what anyone else thinks.

Easier said than done xx

hugs

Rach and Doo xx

ps...loving the bhudda jokes and especially the coroner one....! very clever that one...tee hee..xxx

what do you call 13 witches in a hot tub?......a self cleaning covern...lol

I nicked that one.

Thanks for your support, and yes it was another good night, ending with the litre bottle of SC presentation at the end... should keep me goinf for a couple of days.

Only just got in so keeping this short... if you look on imageshack there should be an option for thumbnail,... think that should do it... if not, I will be editing this post.

Jon

Hi Shiny

Good idea to move on without forgetting the past. I was lost for a while looking for where you were!! Had a great holiday and believe it or not stumbled across a little shop that said BET NOW! That got me all excited for a split second then realised I don't bet anymore! Not even sure what the shop was. Lottery tickets I'm thinking! Anyway will catch up in due course as been traveling all day and very tired. Take care everyone

Hey shiny,

I always want to put an E in shiny for some reason.!

I have found it hard to try and support my mum since my dad died, in terms of i cant take away her pain, all i can do is love her, make her laugh, support her and eat the contents of her fridge lol. Your supporting your dad and trying to get him to a place of accepting some help and that is admirable.

I know what you mean about worrying about what other people think, but i think your moving to a place where your comfortable in your own skin. I always say to my little girl when she has exams, it doesnt matter about the results as long as you try your very best.

I hope today is kind to you... and like you say just keep on keeping on.

Blondie xxxxx

hey shiney....

I also always want to put an E in your name.....lol

thanks for popping in hun..yep..am putting my heart out there again and hopefully I won't start behaving like a t*t and sabotaging out of fear.

Its time to start living .

Glad your Dad is getting sorted out for the longer term and hopefully you and your sis feel more settled knowing he has a support package in place....

I missed that post and only picked up on it this morning... ...

well..rain again cats and dots ...am out with an old retired retailer for lunch as they are going to stop on their way back from holiday in wales..

It will be the tea rooms and fairy cake friday for us...

over and out for now from the HMS Calm Waters

Rach and Doo xxx

shiny. I was going to post 101 things about shiny, but by the time i post with my typing skills lol it would be post 146 no doubt! So i will say just this. "INSPIRING" thankyou from me to you. Keep on keeping on. Duncs stepping forward never back.

Please don't ban karaoke, I love it. I can't sing a note but when I pick up that mic I feel like Tom Jones. Bought one for Maisie for Christmas, whole family were P*ssing themselves at my efforts to sing.

Thanks for you're post, I don't want a letter from the queen tho'. I doff my cap to no one unless they've earned that right. Can't do with all that tradition.

Hope you have a nice weekend Shiny, take care. Steve

Early post today ,

I am off to work shortly , but the first part of the weekly challenge is to say did I meet it.

Over view of the week, this was a tough one, not to do with gambling urges but issues at home and at work, but I have got through them and I am back to my middle

So this week I have:

Renewed my driving licence put that one off for 7 months .

Learnt how to post pictures on this forum , hope it did not *** anyone off .

Bought myself a memory foam mattress . Never just spend money on me .

Took eldest daughter shopping for the first time in 18 months.

So numerous thing achieved this week.

Taking my daughter shopping was the biggy.

When I used to go shopping with my children , I which was rare cause I either did not have the money or wanted to keep what I had. Z(subconsciously to gamble with)

I would get rid of them as quickly as poss so I old go have a punt and win back what I spent on them , though as we all know I would loose it and more besides.

This week we went shopping all fine and dandy .

Then my daughter went one way I the other , but I was not looking or think of gambling .

So that's a step forward, I had my cards and money with me . So that's also a step forward .

So all in all I met a challenge or two.

Wonder what next week holds .

Maybe jetting off to *** parrie like the blonde one.

Take care you all hear .

Shiny xxxxxxxx

Good Morning,

Nice post. Lovely to see you setting yourself new challenges. I can definetely see you have moved on in your recovery.

I cannot believe there was no mention of Costa Coffee. When I get dragged shopping with my wife there is always a bribe made in the way of a medium mocha with a cake at Costa Coffee. This keeps me goiing at least until the half way point. I don't know why but I can run ten miles and be fine but I am absolutely knackered within ten minutes of walking round the shops. It drains me of all energy but I am a man. This happens.

I don't know if a memory foam matress would work for me. I roll about all night in bed. Never really settling in the one position. I know someone who has one and says they are great. Enjoy.

I think it is so interesting what you say regarding previous shopping trips with your daughter where you would then try and win back whatever money you had spent. I still don't understand why we became like this. Why couldn't we differentiate the two. Why couldn't we realise that we had to spend money on things. Thinking back this really frustrates me.

Have a nice day.

Tomso.

In our recovery journeys, we go through lots of different stages and it seems that you have just hit a major one.

Being able to treat others without worrying about money really is something to smile about. I was able to do this a few months back and loved it. I was able to really treat myself as well when those PPI payments came through and loved it.

There will be more stages to come and we just all have to really work very hard to reach those.

It's all about making the right choices for ourselves and our families.

Have a great day.

NT