hopefully a new start

Well done for getting through day one and starting a diary.

FOBT stands for fixed odds betting terminal - I can think of more appropriate names for them. They are electronic machines that are found in bookmakers that offer all kinds of casino games. As highly profitable to the bookmakers as they are addictive to the punters. Much the same as online casinos.

Dreaming about gambling is more than common, probably inevitable for a gambling addict. You'll read people writing about gambling dreams regularly on the forum, especially in the early days of stopping.

What is far less common is to admit and take action after just seven months (it took me 124 months).

You don't realize it, and it might not feel like it now, but you're already doing really well.

With a good barriers in place it might be worth phoning the GamCare helpline to try to help understand the reasons why you gamble, which will be the best way to help you stop.

Once and for all.

Best wishes

Glint

Hi thank you for saying what fobt is i googled it earlier haha.. i know im one of the lucky ones to realise so early but its only because my mum hates gamblers they lie and some steal i say she hates them but its not the person its the disease she hates, my dad was also a compulsive gambler left my mum and 5 children with no money most months but he refused to admit it called my mum horrible names ect the only reason he doesnt gamble now is because he had a major stroke is no longer mobile to do so. I started out with fruit machines when we would go to the arcade for a bit of fun i always snuck of and found the over 18s part and what was meant to be fun didnt last long. Im stopping because im making myself ill and feel like my family would be better off if i wasnt here so i want to get rid of that feeling and think of them and my son.

As to contacting gam care i want to see if i can go a week or two alone (with mums help) first if i still have strong urges to gamble and i will not give in (cant anyway as unable to put card details on site which is good) i will phone them and seek advice and support but im finding it good comfort here in this forum reading peoples experiences and troubles and how and why they want to stop. In my 1st day every time i got the urge i came onto here and read a few stories and made myself realise why it is i want to kick this disease and hope it never rears its ugly head again.

Thanks again for posting means alot 🙂

Sarah x

Hi Sarah, well done on taking the steps to stop this addiction! Slots is also my downfall and the big piece of advice I got from this site was the triangle-time, money and location. Take one of more away and its puts barriers in place to stop you gambling! I will keep reading your diary to see how you get on, good luck on your journey!x

Hi.... day 2 over with actually managed to sleep more than i have done for the last few weeks. Ive been so drained where im constantly been thinking about when i can get my next fix. But day 2 was a lot better than day 1 i guess its easier when you have no way to deposit money onto the sites.

Im wondering if you can sue a company for trying to lure you back in?? Every site Ive self excluded from have all been sending me inviting emails offering me oretty sign up bonuses ect.. but surely as my account has been self excluded due to responsible gambling they shouldnt contact me??

Ive been wanting to tell my partner about my addiction but i know 100% I will be single after if i do he will not understand nor will he want to he isnt the sympathetic type never has been so i keep telling myself its for all our sakes i keep it from him even though i hate lying (although im not lying if the subject of gambling never comes up).

I get paid in 1 week and im looking forward to the furture even if im left broke for a while i will clear my debt with my mum so i can then be free of this dirty god forsaken disease. Someone said i will always be a CG but i.dont believe that. Dont get me wrong i will never touch a FOTB again weather it be in a pub or online i wouldnt like to test that theory i consider myself a lot luckier than a majority of people on here. Thousands in debt and struggling but still managing to stay positive about their life which i find awsome 🙂 because im so depressed with my life atm and im only down £3000.

Heres to day 3!! Stay strong and positive people we can beat this together.

Sarah xoxo

Hi S ,and welcome to the forum , My names Alan and I'm a compulsive gambler , my vice was the Fobt's in the bookies shops and I have lost many thousands on them over the last few years , I've now not had abet for nearly 200 days and life is great !.

We all go through those depressed feelings early on simply because everything is still so raw , your sick to the stomach about what youv'e done and gutted about what youv'e lost and the person youv'e become .

That's the horrible bit over with !, trust me it will get better , get a few weeks of gamble free time under your belt and the fog thats clouding your brain right now will start to clear .

Money comes and goes in our life and what you lost can be earned and replaced in time , but your life can't so I'm really glad youv'e decided to stop now and seek help , this placve is great for a rant , a chat or just writing down how you feel on any given day , there's also loads of great advice and if you have any questions just ask , you'll normally get a reply pretty quickly or someone will point you in the right direction .

The next bit you might not like , when I say that addiction thrives on secrecy and it's great that your mum knows and has taken control of your finances but think seriously about your partner and how he would feel were he to find out at a later date that you hadn't been honest ? , its your decision and just my take on things so yiou know best what you need to do but would you want to start a married life with a lie ?.

I told my partner and kids everything , it was one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do and I didn't know what the outcome would be , thankfully they supported me and there support has allowed me to move forward with recovery and a better life .

As for being a compulsive gambler , yeah , unfortunately I think once we get to where we are now , its for life , I know I could never go back to just having an odd flutter ever again .

Sorry for sounding harsh , I know its a lot to take in right now but keep posting and reading the diarys of others on the recovery diary section , there a good bunch over there , lots of chat and different opinions on recovery , so just do what feels right for you and ditch the rest you don't need !.

Talk to you again soon , take care , little steps and one day at a time ..............Best wishes ................Alan

Can't have been easy for your mother. How sad. Understandable why your mother would take a dim view of gambling.

Sensible to settle into good habits and see how you feel in a couple of weeks.

The GamCare helpline will always be there if ever you feel you need it.

Gambling addicts will often suffer with low self-esteem, anxiety or depression. Notice in your posts you mention feeling depressed and low. Seeking help for those feelings might help you should such feelings persist.

People have tried to sue gambling companies before, to my knowledge always unsuccessfully - I could be wrong. For many reasons taking that action would massively increase the chance of your partner finding out about it.

If this is an avenue you wish to pursue then keep all your correspondence with the companies and contact Citizens Advice, they offer free consumer advice.

I think emailing the gambling companies to make them aware that you are self-excluded and don't want to receive any promotional emails from them would be the best thing to do in your situation.

Well thats day 3 under my belt and not one thought about gambling 🙂 getting better still think i have a long way to go as im sure there will be days that i will want to gamble. I saw from my bank statement that alone i did 13 solid days without a gamble so im positive ill be ok now my mum has my card.

At work is my hardest time. Im at work now but ive been managing to keep myself busy so i dont get time to think about it really so far its worked i just got to keep it that way. I worked with a guy he was one of the managers and he had a really really bad addiction constantly on his mobile betting and playing slots he got sacked because he ended up stealing from work and returning it all for the cash to feed his addiction he is another reason why i want to stop i no way want to end up like that.

I had a peaceful sleep yesterday to which thankfully was a god send as the weather was nice and i was able to get up and see some day light and spend some quality time with my fiancГЁ and our baby boy been a long while since weve done that.

Long may it continue..

Sarah xoxo

Day 4 done. It was a little hard yesterday partner went fishing i was home alone bored luckily ive got all blocks in place as i maybe would have been tempted to have that little bet.

I dont feel as depressed as i did when i was gambling so things are starting to look up hopefully.

Another day no gambling 🙂

I nearly caved and gambled yesterday 🙁 thankfully i was strong enough to resist but only a little my urges to gamble were the stongest they had been yesterday.

5 days down which makes me feel good but it is a long way off from being over somehow i dont think the feeling will ever go away maybe just fade with time?

Hello guys a whole week and not gambled i strongly believe its through reading other peoples stories thats helped me through this tough time.

The urges have been getting stronger as time goes on but im fighting them with everything i have and thinking about my wedding and my son.

The depressing feeling is still lingering also cant wait for that to go, does it ever go? Low confidence is slowly going back to being more confident so looking ok there 🙂

Heres to another week 🙂
Good luck everyone.
Sarah xx

Almost 2 weeks and not gambled feeling so proud of myself 🙂 got paid on Friday and i have actually got wages left and saved money towards my wedding instead of wasting it on online slots.

Im a member of slimming world (want to look nice on wedding day ha) and was doing well until i stopped gambling and got depressed so stsrted eating the chocolate and had a few weight gains but Im feeling much better in myself last few days all chocolates stopped and im back on track with the diet and no gambling so life is looking much better :).

I know its still early days but im confident my gambling days are over as i do not wish to feel the way i did whilst doing it shameful disgusted hated myself thoughts of harming myself i just dont want them back.

Have a good day everyone xx

Great stuff Sarah, you are doing so well and sound very positive. I also gained a couple of pounds when i quit gambling nearly a month ago but I would much prefer that than losing 0000's from my bank balance. Keeping thinking about that wonderful wedding of yours and how good it feels to have some money in the bank.

Its been a few weeks since i last posted and already im regreting it ive had a relapse not much but £40 to much 🙁 i was doing so well to 32 days solid! I feel really bad about it hence why ive come to write a post. Is this normal?
I need help....