Day 27, still on this journey still going strong. I've noticed a small knock-on effect of quitting gambling in that it has started me thinking about tackling other bad habits and making me less inclined to do them. I think self-discipline works like that, once you start building it in one area of your life it makes it easier, and more sense to build it in other areas of life. Because fundamentally all you are doing is overcoming the urges that your brain as to do something that is destructive or unhealthy for you. This is the exact same mind mechanism you have to overcome with anything addictive or something you don't want in your life. You can of course distance yourself and put barriers or boundaries in place to make it a lot easier for yourself. But there is always going to be moments that thoughts pop up in your brain and you start contemplating, thinking or maybe start to try and rationalise partaking in the bad behaviour. This is at the moment where you need to find the strength to step in and make the correct decisions. I've heard it said that your life is just a direct result of every decision you've ever made. This is so true, let's be honest you are not always going to make every one correctly in your life. But choosing the correct decision every time when it comes to whether or not to gamble will have a huge positive effect in your life. It's only a small decision, you might have to make less and less frequently as gambling becomes less something you think about all the time. But still it's all about making the correct decision, sticking to the choice of not gambling. You have the belief these little small moments of making the correct decisions can lead you into a life you want to live, away from the path of being a slave to your addiction and urges.
Day 29. Weekend past and no slip-ups glad to report. I feel generally I am thinking about gambling less and less, although still get the occasional reminder of it through an advert or someone talking about it. But if you exist in a modern day society were gambling is a commonplace thing then you are never going to be able to avoid it being mentioned it's just something you going to have to cope with. The same way a recovering alcoholic is going to have walk past pubs or beer displays in a supermarket, it is no different really. One thing I have noticed which I wanted to mention is I used to compulsively check my banking app like multiple times a day when I was gambling. Now I don't have that anymore. Previously when I gambled I had to know the exact amount of money I had, no it's less of an importance. I mentioned before about debt and how I'm lucky not really be in any. I have some small things to pay off and back which give another month or two and I should have that completely under control. Now I look forward to trying to build some wealth for myself, being financial secure and having my own place those are the top of my priority right now. I realise it's going to take hard work and the discipline to stay on this journey but it's one I'm really committed towards keeping on. I want to be able to look back when I'm older and be proud that I turned my life around and didn't just send thee entirety of it a degenerate gambler. My life story is basically that up to this point, but I have the power to write the next chapters better by choosing to make the correct decisions everyday.
Day 30, feels sort of milestone-y today. Reaching the one month total gamble-free is I think an achievement for me and honestly I haven't found it super difficult or anything. Although it is important not to get complacent and realise you still need to keep on top of this, you still need to keep reminding yourself of why you are doing this. Because I know often with addiction it can be only one small relapse back into old behaviour that can suddenly cause you to spiral again into bad ways. I'm still at the stage where it is just one day at a time, just do not gamble for today. That's the only rule you have to abide by, saying not today to gambling everyday is the path to a better life. I am also in the mind of improving other areas of my life now, because I'll be honest I've let some areas of my life slide a bit. Been spending more time on social media and maybe eating not super great all the time. The goal for me as always to be as healthy as possible, I wouldn't say I'm completely unfit, I'm probably in good shape by general standards but I just now I can get a lot fitter and exercising and eating well I think it boosts your energy and gives more vitality to your life and it also something you can get super dialled in and obsessive over. That's the thing about most gambling addicts I would so is that we probably do have an inherent trait for obsession, which most people would view as a bad thing. But also it can be power for good, if only you can focus and become obsessed over the actual things that will improve your life rather than destroy. I am always interested in looking at successful people in various area of life. You will notice that nearly all of them have the obsessive trait to, they become completely obsessed with the area they are trying to succeed at.
Hi Fyodor
Well done on the first month done. Glad to hear you are watching out for complacency as it can strike at any point
In terms of obsessive behaviours, it can sometimes be looking for a solution to life whether that be stress, loneliness, self esteem etc which I certainly experienced. Once I work through those and do each day, the compulsion for anything has been lifted
Thanks Stuart. Yeah you are definitely right about working through those problems in your life and not giving into the temptation to gamble to try and solve the problem because ultimately it doesn't solve the problem, not in the long-term anyway it just creates even more problems down the line. I was looking on a tracker app I do have on my phone that I had been using to track my non-gambling days and other habits for years now. So I've always been conscious of it. I've had some decent streaks on there, 54 days (Jan-Feb 2025), 39 days (Jan-Feb 2024), 35 days (Nov-Dec 2025) plus a number of others just below a month mark. So I have periods of going gamble-free before it's just a case now or keeping for at it in the long-term. I remember the longest 54 day streak one, and I remember what broke it was me getting some bad news financially and I suddenly tried to look to gambling as a solution to it. I think you have to be very wary of your triggers, for me if it is definitely boredom/loneliness or when something stressful happens in my life. These events are never going to stop happening you just have to learn to deal with them in healthier ways. That's the difficultly especially when your default reaction you've built in your mind is to turn to gambling. Day 31, although sports was part of my gambling I think watching the World Cup as actually been a nice distraction from that in a weird way I've not had much time to think about me not gambling instead I've just sat and focused solely on watching the games from a purest sort of love of the game aspect.
Where you mainly online ? To give context, how old are you roughly and how long did you gamble ?
Where you mainly online ? To give context, how old are you roughly and how long did you gamble ?
Vast majority online, specifically a well-known betting exchange. Late 30's, it's twenty years plus now. I think talked more about my specific situation in my opening post on this diary if you want to know more.
Day 32, one thing I have noticed that since I've been gamble-free is that I still have the need to take risks in some form or be more adventurous in areas of life. Which can range from maybe trying a new or different food or reaching out to someone and starting a conversation with someone (unusual for me!). I find this interesting, maybe there is a sort of risk-taker part of my personality that I need to satisfy or maybe it's just the need for novelty in my life. That's one thing that gambling can always provided you with, it's available basically 24 hours a day, the risk-taking, the novelty, every situation in gambling is kind of unique. In normal every day life it can seem like you don't get that, often in life you can fall into the mundane trap of doing the same thing every day which can lead to boredom. But the more I think about it, you don't need to spend your life like that if you don't want. There's plenty of room for novelty in loads of different areas, you can eat different food, wear different clothes, go take up a new hobby, watch a book or film you wouldn't usually watch. I'm coming to realise now that gambling was perhaps taking up the novelty quota in my life and that was turning my life outside that rather grey.
Hi Fyodor
I so resonate with what you are saying but I have a different way at looking at it. In action my addiction tried to narrow my life and told me don't speak to them, don't visit them, dont have fun and you don't eat that. It was my addictive brain trying to concentrate on gambling and focus me solely on that.
Hi Fyodor
I so resonate with what you are saying but I have a different way at looking at it. In action my addiction tried to narrow my life and told me don't speak to them, don't visit them, dont have fun and you don't eat that. It was my addictive brain trying to concentrate on gambling and focus me solely on that.
True Stuart gambling can totally warp your perception on what is important in life. I was down that path too. I would sacrifice money I needed to buy things just so I could go gambling with it.
Day 33, that brings me onto my point I want to make today. About how removing gambling can free up a lot of space in your life, not only in terms of time and energy but also in terms of mental thought. I let so many different things in my life just slide by, even simple things like cleaning, shopping and socialising. I would just move them down the priority list, they were always playing second fiddle to gambling. Pretty sad to think of all the areas of my life I've left neglected or simply not spending the time on them that I should be. Obvious when you are gambling you don't really pay much attention to these, true they may be at the back of your mind but you just kick the can down the road for another day and find whatever excuses you need to be spend your day gambling and neglecting your responsibilities elsewhere. Weirdly enough I've not had much kickback from other people in life, although I have hid a lot of it from other people this is true. But it's almost as if they don't expect much of me, which I actually I hate, I want to be that person that people can rely on, that person everyone thinks as their life in order. At the moment I'm just the guy with no money who nobody expects anything much from.
Hi mate
So true. I think gambling addiction narrows life to get me to concentrate on that alone and isolate away from anything non gambling. It's so consuming
@lp5vut869c absolutely stuart yes, that's the total dangerous thing about it, can be a total all-consuming thing and I've definitely spent entire days maybe week-long binges where it's pretty much the only thing I'm thinking about.
Day 35, it feels a lot longer than that since I've stopped. I do feel like I have come quite a long way in a short space of time. My mind is beginning to adjust I don't feel myself seeking the gambling as much. The thoughts and urges to gamble are becoming less and less. Which is great it makes the journey easier of course. The actual benefits to your life I realise might come a little later down the line once gambling has been out of your life for a while. For now I probably still am in the place of my life being a result of my past gambling. There's always I find a sort of delayed affect of what you've done in the past finally coming into fruition. For the average person who sees me they may not even notice much difference in me, but I hope in a year or two I'll be a completely different person, one who is more confident and self-disciplined and completely free of the vice of gambling that was keeping me shackled into a life I never wanted to live.
Day 36, anyone watch the England game last night? What a game hey? Honestly one of the best buzzes I've ever got from watching a game of football and it didn't have to involve gambling, who knew! Showed to me it is possible to still enjoy the sport and realise it's way more than just something to bet on, it's way bigger than that. My gamble-free journey is still going well, I actually feel like I'm gaining confidence along the way, I've proven to myself I can stay self-disciplined and stick to something. I'm already starting to look forward and get excited about what my life is going to shape into completely free of this vice, which has been holding me back for so long.
Hi mate
I was so worried that when I gave up 8 couldn't enjoy sport but it's so much better isn't it
Hi mate
I was so worried that when I gave up 8 couldn't enjoy sport but it's so much better isn't it
I'm not sure how to describe it, feels like a completely different experience. Sort of less important in one sense but more important in an other. I think you can definitely feel the human element or follow the narrative more closely when you are watching it purely as spectator and a fan, not worrying about the result. Well of course you want your team to win but it doesn't create the same stress as when you've stuck a big bet on a game or a race and you desperately want that outcome to happen. You can zoom and enjoy the experience knowing it's not going to affect you personally with regards to finance.
Day 37, I'm approaching the something of the magical 40 day mark where they say you've pretty much done the hard-lifting when it comes to removing an addiction out of your life. Although I've seen different people talk about different studies and actually how many days it takes to build new habits/break old addictions. Everyone's brain is a little different but I think having a sort of milestone where you can responsible expect things to start feeling better and easier is always a pleasant thing to look forward to. I'm still very conscious of not letting myself slip and keep on this journey because one small slip can lead to potentially going back down a dangerous path once again. My moods I notice have been a little up and down of the course of these days but I suppose that's supposed to be expected, when I was basically using gambling to try escape the low feelings. Now I have to just sit in them, or find healthy ways to entertain myself.
Hi mate
I know you were saying the opposite but I can't believe some people who spend hours per day for years gambling and do a bit of recovery work and think it's all good. We all know how that ends and I see it in GA rooms all the time only for them to come back six months later to start again with more debt, more lost time and more mental damage.
For me it's about finding a balance to put the work in every day for life..I've seen people relapse after ten years so I know it's always there waiting to strike. It just gets easier each day.
Today im a day further from my last bet but I'm still one bad thought and action away from the next one.
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