I reached breaking point mentally, the betrayal was killing me.
i thought my marriage would be over.
Its not. I’m truly blessed with the most kind and understanding husband.Â
he hugged me and talked to me about what I’ve being doing. He’s phoning Gamcare tomorrow for advice on how he can support me.
he’s coming to my doctors appointment to help me seek treatment for long term mental health issues. He bought me a scallop butty and a chocolate bar. He says I have an illness and should not feel ashamed.
His kindness has overwhelmed me. I was living in fear of him finding out and feeling betrayed and leaving me. Then there was the massive debts I have secretly racked up. He says I must be c**P at gambling.
Ive being feeling so lost with no way out. I now feel hope from his love. I’m extremely lucky and blessed.
I’m only at the start of this journey and illness, but I have hope that I couldn’t feel yesterday.
what did i tell u?
Your right its an illness and a decease
??❤️
So glad he was supportive. Well done for telling him. Must have been hard but you can face things together now.Â
@jess27 thank you, it was extremely difficult, I’m horrendous for talking. I made him read an email Id pre-typed then sent whilst sat next to him. Not the best I know, but was my only way because my emotions don’t allow me to talk.
it’s been a horrendous 24 hours, just mentally draining on the both of us. It broke him earlier today. I did expect a delayed reaction.Â
I just want to get better. I don’t want to gamble and I want to sort out my underlying issues that led me to this so I can be a better wife and mother.
He says I should be proud of admitting I’m not well. I’ll be proud when I start recovering.
I have a long battle ahead but im prepared to do whatever it takes to fix myself and try and put right the damage I’ve caused.
im very flat tonight, tired and almost empty
You're bound to feel drained. You'll probably find your emotions and moods are up and down over the coming weeks and your husband might be a bit up and down too. At least everything is out in the open now. You can start to focus on getting better.Â
This rings so true to me. I have a number of traumatic events that I’ve left unresolved that I never dealt with.
My husband said from day one of us that he believed I had anxiety, depression and ptsd.
Because I’d always felt the same way, I just thought I was ‘normal’ and fine.
I never previously connected my gambling addiction with any of this the first time round. This time however, it’s like everything is beginning to make sense.
Well done to you by the way, that’s pretty amazing!
It seems that Dave has given you the key to release you from the prison that gambling put you in. Having a key to release one from misery is better than a big gambling win!
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