Life With Sports Bets Only

Captain

Well done on the 6 weeks stayin in control and steering away from the random gambling , I know its not everyone's view of an ideal recovery but it suits and is working for u

To put another slant on ur situation and the affect it as on others , speaking for myself last week I had some real strong urges mainly down to my trigger of boredom and came mighty close to giving in to them, I used logical thinking and av to say I thought a lot bout ur random gambling and it actually helped me to make the right decision, my 1st bet win or lose would at just led to more and I would av bet on everything without thought the only way I could win for me was not placing that 1st bet

I really do understand ur logic with just sports bets it could never work for me I can't step inside a bookies place a bet and walk out once I'm in I'm a different person , so for u to walk in place a bet walk out and then if u win to collect then walk out again then credit where credit is due that I cannot do and suspect many would agree and there's the difference from urself to others

It is ur diary so keep posting and doin what's right for u just to reiterate I honestly felt ur diary helped me and stopped me from a relapse as u made me aware of the random gambling a trap that I av fallen into many a times

Castle2

the trap that I at always fallen into

Hi captain,

Thank you for your encouraging words on my diary. I am very greatful for all the help i get and i am more than happy if my words helps someone in their own recoveries.

All the best in your journey

Sandra

Stress trigger today - same one I get once or twice a week and it is unavoidable.

Reminder that stress trigger is stronger than boredom trigger.

For years I thought only way of dealing with stress trigger was gambling. Ironically every time I gambled after stress trigger I always won or broke even. The days where I was totally out of control were primarily driven by boredom trigger.

Anyway I now deal with stress trigger by deep breaths, walking and reminding myself of all the pain of losing that random gambling has given me.

Just glad stress trigger isnt more frequent, if it happened more than once in a day or a few consecutive days I'd possibly find it more difficult to deal with.

Continuing to adjust to life without random gambling. Still no urges and have ways of dealing with the triggers.

Feels like a death in the family though. I loved the thrills and spills and continuous action and ups and downs from Sprint Valley, steepledowns, portman park, hope park, sandy lanes, lucksin downs and the like.

Just a pity I couldn't have continued to enjoy them responsibly. But I am and always will be a compulsive gambler so I need to go through the grieving process and remember all the bad days and horrific feelings that virtual racing brought me. This was a Jekyll and Hyde family member who gave me sweets every day for 3 weeks then asked me to give them all back and buy some as well on week 4.

Cap,

I find it really interesting reading diaries that discuss the type of betting that they were involved in. For me, roulette is the killer and others show no interest in playing this game. I, on the hand, would never be interested in virtual racing. I could never understand people sitting beside me on a machine betting on a dog race. I couldn't work this out. Why play this on a machine when the real thing is live on a big screen every ten or twenty minutes.

Betting on animals in general never interested me. Football on the other hand is what got me into gambling. I would always pick three away teams. I found fantasizing about winning a big football bet today as I was watching the results come in. I was kidding on to have six correct results when, no joke, about three results all changed in the last few minutes. This puts me off betting on football anymore. Games seem to rumble on until almost five o'clock now. How can they not be finished yet. And then it happens the goal flash shows some muppet scoring a last minute own goal and all is lost.

Tomso.

I read of all the stories of what people on this Forum are doing now that they are not gambling and I am happy for them when they say their life is better.

But for me the things they describe are either things I already do or have done, or they are things I have no interest in.

I realise I am a person of very few interests and have spent so much time over the years considering what else I could do in my spare time. But to no avail.

Gambling did not prevent me doing anything, it only prevented me financially from renewing and upgrading things and maybe a few extra holidays. But in the main it didn't prevent me from the free, normal, everyday things people on here describe. If I didn't do things it was because I chose not to.

Morning captain

Some good points there and a bit to debate on I get totally what ur saying, this last two weeks I had 3 full days on my hands and they were long days broke up by an hourat the gym a bit of shopping and the rest watchin films or tv for me not a lot of excitement I know I could av gambled all day on these long days and it would at been exciting and the day would av passed quicker for me it comes down this yes a day with ups and downs thrills and spills with lots of random gambling on everything but cos I can't stop it would be a certainty I would lose everything then would at it been such an exciting fun day

This brings into play the controlled gambling that everyone desires but unfortunately for a lot of us def myself cannot happen I wish I could walk in with 30 quid spend a few hours and stay in control but I can't if I lost the 30 I would av to try win it back no matter what iv tried leaving cards at home only to drive back to get them

Even in the event of a so called winning streak happened in the 3 days I had this would just leave me with the taste for more and then the full day would turn to half day then a spare hour then any minute to find a way to bet, for me this is all tried and tested the outcome is I can't gamble the results will always be disastrous

What I will say though the next morning after my non exciting day I felt great a sense of pride for not giving in I do want that better life and I know gambling won't bring me that

So I do get why ur doin it ur way 4 days of golf or 2 hours of football and that gives u some excitement or buzz and forfills ur day, I really hope it works for u as we all say recovery is bespoke each to their own and I honestly wish I could do it ur way but I know I can't kidded myself too many times

Really pleased its working out for u keep posting its all good stimulation and wets the appetite for this site

Castle2

Thanks for the post Castle.

I believe that those who have experienced success and achievements and highs and happiness in their lives find it harder to cope with a mundane life. Those who havent are happier and more easily contented with the simpler things.

Gambling gives us the opportunity to experience the happiness and highs but they dont compare to natural human highs.

If like me you simply dont have anything in your life which gives you the highs you once had, then also remove the gambling, I think thats what makes the recovery period longer due to the forced resignation that all the best times of your life are behind you.

Captain,

Just wanted to check-in and say hi. As always, your diary offers a compelling read. I can certainly relate to your most recent point... despite my (relatively) young age, I'd say I've experienced some significant 'highs' - whether through professional sport, business, finance, travelling, gambling - whatever. I too can find the 'mundane' nature of day-to-day life utterly soul-destroying, and envy those who perhaps have been exposed to less opportunity etc. as they can be content with their lot. Reading that back, it sounds pretty pompous, but I think you'll understand my point.

Anyway, I'll save you the same message I constantly send you on here... I'm loathe to 'lecture' anyone on here - how people manage recovery is their own personal journey. But I'll just say once again - I CANNOT be the man who gambles sensibly or in moderation. This automatically makes my life more placid, dull and boring, but that is a choice I simply have to take as an adult. Gambling will surely bring about my complete destruction.

Personally, I hope that eventually you will reach a point where you are comfortable and satisfied not gambling. I'd never tell anyone what they should and should not do (nor would I claim to be a reformed, recovered individual), but I hate to see people hurt themselves over and over and over again until the pain is unbearable - so that abstinence (or something altogether worse) is the only way out.

Good luck mate

D123

Cap,

On this occasion, I have to disagree with you buddy. You say that you have no other interests in life but perhaps this is one of your symptoms of long term gambling addiction. People who chase gambling losses and constantly worry about money and fret about how they will survive until the end of the month can hardly get themselves off the couch let alone take up new interests and hobbies and who can blame them we have all been there.

Then there is the alienating ourselves from friends and family giving every second we have to gambling. At first we kindly reject all social offers like going out with friends for dinner, or to the cinema or down the pub or whatever because we cannot afford to attend. We don't want to attend because we are feeling sorry for ourselves and can think of nothing other than how we can win our money back.

In the midst of gambling madness we lose all drive and energy. Exercise - no thanks. We are so constantly drained that exercise becomes as appealing as being stabbed in the eye.

Gambling doesn't allow single men to meet a new girl and vice versa. No money, no energy and lack of self respect and self esteem ensure that we are unappealing or not fun to be around.

We become so irritated and anxious that we could be mistaken for drug addicts without their hit.

I know of smokers who in their twenties claimed to be fit and strong only to struggle walking up the stairs in their forties. Their addiction has dragged them down and will continue to take everything from them. Same with gambling only not as visual.

You don't just give up gambling and start loving new activities. You give up gambling and start to feel good about yourself and then you take an interest in life again and then fall into new opportunities. People who don't experience this do so because they are moping about their situation. Don't do that. Rejoice. We are ridding ourselves of the one thing that can rip our soul and lives apart.

You are making out that gambling is the most fun thing to do in the world and that is just not true because if it were everyone would be doing it. Instead, people are running marathons, climbing mountains, travelling the world, exploring and experiencing new things.

I am not directing this post just at you but what you are doing is harder than giving up. People who give up experience a peace and happiness and feeling of self accomplishment whereas you enjoy none of this but are trying to cut back on the one thing you claim to enjoy the most. You are like the smoker who is trying to cut down. You are constantly craving something. It is all an illusion. Go 100 days without any gambling and you will know what I am talking about. Why not try. There will still be lots of horses to bet on three months from now and if your life is worse then than now then at least you can go back to it with a vengeance with all the extra money you will have saved from now until then.

You can't honestly say that you have not lost or wasted time through gambling. We have all experienced this. We all have regrets and with time the biggest ones are not financial.

More than anything you are great therapy for me because you make me want to post. You make me think about gambling but in the way I should with dread.

You have hot interest in your diary but I think part of it may be people are waiting for a big fall. Personally, I like you a great deal and really hope that it doesn't happen. I hope so much you stick to sports betting only.

Tomso.

This is just a general observation from reading posts recently, not aimed at any particular individual. Whilst I realise that people want to talk about everyday things they do and how their life has improved through not gambling I think there is too much rambling on this Forum these days.

There are other places where people can chat to each other online. The posts should be recovery related and not just chat about people's lives with a short reference if anything to gambling and recovery. If friendships have been formed then communications should be taken offline and keep posts on here related to the topic.

I like to review posts to aid my recovery and for support, assistance and therapy but too often get stories of peoples lifes in general rather than about gambling recovery.

This is my general observation...

Most of the people are still not bargaining with the devil as you are with controlled betting and as a natural consequence of that they have other things to talk about.

Those posts inspire others to continue with abstinence as it shows to newcomers and people struggling that there is a life beyond betting.

If you see this as "rambling " then I feel sorry for you ..I see that as as living a well rounded life..not one dominated by a single activity .

What I don't understand is if you like betting and don't want to stop why do you need to keep a recovery diary?

Captain,

I appreciate the way you look at your recovery, you bet or whatever, you moving on on your way.

You know, you have edited your post, which come across aimed to everyone on this journey. It is our diaries, we find friends here to help us go by, we try our hardest to stay on straight and narrow....we care, we found new life with ZERO gambling, so please just let us carry on and aid ourselves in this difficult journey....

Sandra

Your stock responses bear no resemblance to any posts.

I am beginning to wonder if you're a wind up merchant to be honest .

I have no problem with you being a controlled gambler as it does not affect me , however I do have a problem with you sitting in your glass house and throwing stones.

The first time I encountered your posts was on another's thread when you felt the need to be the forum police..I then went on to read your diary as the feeling I got from reading your post on another's thread was that you suffer greatly with jealously .

After reading your diary this made a lot of sense and given your self confessed obsession with winning , I should imagine that jealousy and anger are the 2 emotions that go along with loosing .

It may surprise you that I think you should continue gambling..in many respects we have a lot in common being in the minority and also having a part of our psyche so fragile that if unpicked the whole person would fall to pieces..

I'm sure in your mind continuing to gamble makes you feel like a winner despite all financial evidence around you that would point to exactly the opposite.

For you I think loosing would almost feel akin to a physical death.

I think you should continue to gamble as I think it's the thread that holds your psyche together, the armour that protects you from even deeper pain, however anyone with a degree of humility would not take pot shots at others who are doing their own work and who face deeper truths about themselves that you cannot.

Part of me thinks that by gambling you retain power and some days I doubt your motive ...I guess depending on your mood on rising you either will see everyone on here abstaining as losers and post in the same way as someone eating a big chocolate cake around a group of people who are trying to slim or be jealous at the ones who are trying to abstain as it is a reminder of what you cannot do.

Whichever way ...People in glass houses should not throw stones.