Life With Sports Bets Only

Really boring day at work today to follow my afternoon of inactivity yesterday. In the past I would have gambled both at lunchtime today and after work.

Not now. Random gambling is not what I do. The thought about it is still there triggered by the boredom but the difference is I will not act on it now.

Morning captain

I read ades post on ur thread with interest and put the question to myself bout my urges on Sunday afternoon and whether reading ur diary played any part in having them , for me the urges were through boredom too much time on my hands to think both key triggers then take yesterday been back at work and not one urge my mind was absorbed by that and when I finished I was ready to relax from work as Sunday I was relaxed from waking up and no plans in place

I truly understand the points ade is making and can see exactly how u mentioning goin in bookies and placing a bet can give urges to some who read ur diary , for me though our diary is there for us to write what we feel good and bad right or wrong if u think it plays a part in ur recovery who is anyone to judge , I'm sure u read the post bout someone who stopped after a successful period of gambling but knew they were fortunate and saw sense they wrote that down for their own benefit but wanted to be honest with themselves , yes they were very cautious of the content as didn't want to offend others and send out the wrong message with gambling

On either posts I read it left me with a choice do I react to them by wanting to go out and gamble or do I accept that recovery is bespoke and its their diary and only doin what's right for them , I gamble through stress boredom and not dealing with problems in my life they are all my triggers for me reading a post is not a trigger if it was then I would av to make that choice not to read that diary if I knew the content could trigger an urge to gamble

Its all opinions though and thats what's great everyone respects that each to their own , again though the debate wettens my appetite for this site as I av struggled many times to find the inspiration to read and post , writing on ur diary will now set me up for the day complacency won't set in

For me ur diary has a positive affect and I follow with interest , keep posting and I will keep reading

Castle2

Thought for today - all compulsive gamblers have the ability to win money. That may be partially due to luck but more likely due to skill and knowledge.

It is the feeling associated with winning that they crave and love. Its not about the money.

Unfortunately they also have a self-destruct button borne out of lack of confidence, self-hatred, frustration, the need to experience losing to make winning feel better when it happens.

Most compulsive gamblers will have periods of time when they cant stop losing and lose everything. But they do also have the ability to continuously win for periods of time.

Most non-compulsive gamblers do not have that regular winning ability - they treat a loss as normal and a win as unexpected and something to celebrate.

For a compulsive gambler a win is never enough and never stays with them long enough to warrant celebration. They are onto trying for the next win or experiencing the next loss.

Some compulsive gamblers are a whisker away from being financially successful but the self-destrcution and lack of control means that can never happen.

5 weeks without random gambling for me now. I don't have any inclination to go back there but like any addict I miss my fix. Boredom at weekends can be filled by many options. Boredom at work is a different matter. Last week I was busy, this week there is nothing happening, that's how this job is.

Boredom at work has been my biggest trigger for random gambling but I'm not giving in to it now.

Cap,

Thanks for the post on my diary. A real difficult couple of days for me. As I said before, I cannot gamble or set foot in a bookies ever again. Bad things happen when I go there.

I know you are comfortable with your current situation but you need to be on your guard. A problem gambler who goes into a betting establishment is, in my opinion, the same as an alcoholic walking into a bar. He may not want a drink but he is a d**n sight closer to failure being there rather than not. Having said that everyone is different and if you feel strong enough and believe you have your situation under control then so be it.

You have been in the dark place that I am in right now and there is nothing worse. The first thing to hit is the knowledge that so much money has gone but that doesn't compare to the psychological warfare that follows. This loss will stay with me for sometime.

My biggest fear is that I will now go weeks without a bet but what will I do a month from now or even longer. I have no confidence any more that I will not fall again. When I first came here I was blown away by this forum and the people on it so much so that I quit and didn't gamble for ten months. You still think that there is something to give up the truth is there are only things to gain.

Tomso.

Thanks for the post Tomso.

Unfortunately for me the only gain for me from periods of abstinence from random gambling is financial. This is based on a number of different occasions now.

I cant do random gambling as I just lose all my money but everything else suffers. I just go through the motions of work and home life and have no get up and go, nothing to look forward to on a day to day basis. I'm just not the same person, guess its the same with any addict who goes without their fix.

There are many things others describe that they come to realise during abstinence, like gambling has taken them away from reality.

I'd admit there was a time a number of years ago where I was in that phase. But for the past few years as I have only spent short amounts of time gambling and filled my life with other things, I have very rarely gambled when not intending to. I chose to spend an hour a day random gambling because I loved it and it added something to my otherwise dull predictable life.

I have stopped because it causes continued financial loss, no other reason.

Captain...I have to disagree with your last post and here is why ...

My ex partner was/ is a horse racing on line gambler. He devised a system whereby he bet on losers not winners ..the idea being that if you bet on a winner in say a 16 horse race or whatever there is 1 winner and 15 losers..surely betting on the losers is a better way.

This had nothing to to with form and he never once bought the horse newspaper that I can't mention on here.

It was all based on stats.

He worked out that 1in 80 races would produce a loss and loss meaning that a donkey would win. He also built in random elements/ probability etc ...and had another loss "pot " that he syphoned off any wins to to compensate for the 1-80 loss...so his winning would remain level and increasing.

He worked out that by betting on a set number of races a day and american racing through the night that he would be a millionaire in 2 yrs with this system and was looking at quitting his 55k a year professional job as a aeronautical engineer to dedicate his time to this pursuit.

You say that a gambler using a clever system can win money at it ..this is true but it's not a sustained consistent income as if that we're the case how come my exes losses far outweigh any wins..it was the element of random in his so called controlled system.

To my knowledge he has borrowed at least 30k from his parents and that was within 1 yr including gambling his near 3k net monthly salary,payday loans of 800 a month ,substantial work bonus' of 5k and cashing in ISAs.

The further this insanity is that he also said that no one would have a problem with him doing this if this were his "business" ...i.e people open up business' and have a few losses along the way..

As I said to him..this is true however any accountant consistently seeing more money lost than gained over a time period of 5 yrs would rightly suggest cutting losses and folding the business not carrying on putting good money after bad just to maintain a meagre living..if that we're the case you would work for someone else for the same or more money and not waste further energy in piling good money after bad into an empty pot.

You say a non compulsive gambler does not have the same skill as someone like yourself ...

Well , I also disagree with that as i also constructed my own experiment during that time and just on pure guessology (random) I used to "win" more than my ex...fortunately I " won" without even placing a bet but on paper, however the knowledge of that still gives me great glee today .....

All the mental gymnastics my ex would go through for 16 hrs a day and I would just win from pure guessology because I liked the name of the horse.

The moral of the story is ..even random donkeys can win! ..some of them 3 races in 10 back to back...that pretty much buggers up the 1 in 80 rule...you then have to use your reserve pot not just to chase back 1 loss in 80 but 3 losses in 10.

How come I won more with my random predictions "consistently " than he did in his controlled system? ..surely this throws into a cocked hat your theory?

My ex lost money regardless of sports betting or as you call random betting ..consistently ,over time he lost !

Rachel x

Ps I'm also pretty good at predicting air crashes. ;>)

Pps ..he also lost 10k on one tennis game.

Thanks for reposting...good luck with your gambling x

Found the following post on another site when doing a search - this backs up how I have felt during previous periods of abstinence and currently. I am experiencing withdrawal symptoms which are having a negative effect on my health:

http://www.gamblingtherapy.or…-GB/ShowThread.aspx?ID=534245

On a separate note, just to clarify following a couple of recent posts, I am not advocating that my continued sports betting will result in me winning, nor that I have any great system attached to it. It is simply that I am able to bet on sports with controlled amounts of affordable stakes and no unplanned bets.

Hi captain,

I was just wondering are you not scared to fall back into compulsive "uncontrolled" gambling by betting only on sports? There is huge chance here, and you might know what you do, but this disease can grip you unexpected and very quickly. Maybe you don't lose now( which i think you do really, even those few quid is out of your pocket) but it might spiral out of control.

it's only my point of view, i am dreading to look at gambling side altogether, and just didn't think there is a possibility to "control" it for a fun...

I would congratulate you on your absence days.....but don't know where you are..is it still day 1 ?

Do what is best for you, and as long as it works, best of luck.

Sandra

Woke up this morning feeling hot, sick feeling in stomach, have had muscular pain and tingling recently. I am irritable, frustrated, I'm getting bored more easily, finding it harder to concentrate, some days I have less appetite, These symptoms are all occuring due to my abstinence from random gambling. Hope they don't last too long and I feel better soon.

Also having many thoughts about my past and reasons for how I am the person I am. I worked all of this out through counselling and self analysis. I can't turn the clock back but most days I have thoughts about wanting to see and deal with some of the people who have helped shape and impact the negative side of my character. It will never happen I know but doesn't stop me thinking about it. Best to concentrate on the positive and the future.

Well another weekend over and despite withdrawal symptoms persisting, another weekend free of random gambling.

My resolve and determination on this have never been greater. I am not going back there.

I can only see a robotic boring life ahead consisting of work and going through the motions and same routines at home but if that's all there is, fine at least my finances will improve and I'll have peace of mind on that score, and the withdrawal symptoms will surely fade in time.

If you can't attack at one end, you have to defend at the other.

Hi Captain,

I have noticed that your offending post referring to openly gambling, that you posted on 27th July has been edited by gamcare staff.

I wish you well in your recovery.

Ade

Cap,

I hope all is well. I was thinking about your continued football betting and wondered how do you cope with horrible luck. I went through a spell of losing accumulators in the final minutes of games for six weeks in a row. Every time this happened I felt hard done by and turned to roulette to try and win my money back. It was mine and by a terrible twist of fate it was snatched away from me. I couldn't handle this. Once is bad but six weeks on the trot drove me mental. I hope you never let any circumstances of this lead you back to random gambling. Keep safe.

Tomso.

6 weeks without any random gambling. Still want to do it every day but no urges. 3 golf bets and 3 football bets in the 6 weeks.

Paid £2000 back, £198000 only to go!

I have to pay my debts back. But remind myself it's not about the money. If I was debt free right now I'd have a better looking house but other than that life wouldn't be any different and I wouldn't be much happier. I chose to spend so much time gambling over the years as it gave me a lot of pleasure and an escape from boredom, stress and reality. Unfortunately as I am a compulsive gambler I couldn't control time and money spent so it gave me financial destruction instead of an enjoyable hobby.