My diary

Day 12

Quiet day at home today. OH is off out with the lads (he deserves it bless him x). No temptations to gamble, just going to pay some bills. Maybe even put some things in line to sell to make some money 🙂 one thing which become more and more apparent on his journey is my depression. Without the distraction of gambling I am forced to face how sad I am and how I unhappy I am about myself. And I just don't know why?? It's so frustrating. He's not a saint but I have a fun, loyal and supportive OH, a great job which I have fought for and a nice comfortable home. It's frustrating and exhausting. Hoping the councilling will be the answer this time. Just want to be happy again and to make that happen I will not gamble.

Nearly 2 weeks. I know your struggle have dealt with depression myself - and the distraction 'works' until you feel worse again. Hoping the councilling helps x

Day 13

Thanks w2s. I really hope it does start to help. Still feeling low but focusing on 2 week achievement tmz 🙂

Just worked out my last PB was 47 days. 47 days!! Only 34 to go to beat it 🙂

So tomorrow is 2 weeks

Monday 4th April I will beat my PB

Hi Rednow ☺

2 weeks is awesome! Very well done!
Only you can make this happen and leave this horrible addiction behind. From where i stand, i see huge determination, positivity and belief shining through!

Keep up good work, you know yourself what benefits gf life brings - go get them all ...you're worth it!

S x

Day 14 - 2 weeks gf! 🙂

Thanks for the words of encouragement and support hopeful. Always muchly appreciated 🙂

Start of a new month and bank statement lol. Am determind not to have any gambling transactions. And no pay day loans!! Have paid all the important bills for this month so just need to manage what I have left to make sure next pay day (23 days) all goes towards the new lifestyle.

Day 15

Half way to 1 month 🙂

Bought myself a new dress today for a treat as have a night out in a few weeks. Trying to give myself rewards to retrain my brain as to what consists as a 'healthy reward' or comfort instead of gambling. I could get used to it lol. Feeling restless this eve so made a load of muffins. Went down well with the OH 🙂 xx

Day 16

Good day today. Downloaded Alan carrs stop gambling audio book so listened to that in the car, bought a new dress for a night out and had councilling in which I didn't cry today. Result! Discussed how I felt guilty today because I had a good day and was feeling happy, all due to the debt and trouble I caused. But that is done and need to continue feeling good as positive is the way forward to beating the thoughts that gambling is a solution/escape.

Good day had, 1 day at a time. Hope everyone else is having a positive gf day x

Good to hear you have treated yourself. Your sounding more positive. Made me smile 🙂

Morning just checking in. Keep up the good work xxx

Day 17

Heavy night so just going to make it through the day and get back to my sofa. This is my focus today! Lol. Alan Carr has currently got me in the mind set of being elated that I have decided to stop gambling because it brings me nothing but misery. Makes sense.

I made it to my sofa!! 😀

Wishing everyone a happy gamble free weekend! The alternative does not make us happy xx

Day 18

Woke up with a headache so giving myself the morning off and then it's a trip in to town before lunch. Have a parcel to collect and already worked out my tv/film viewing for this eve. Can't wait to get some good weather so I can finally get out in the garden!

Hope you're all having a lovely gf wkend 🙂 xx

Day 19

Happy Mother's Day to to all you lovely mothers. I haven't had the pleasure yet and not on the cards any time soon which the gambling has had an impact on, but I'm not going to let that get me down cos I'm already winning by not gambling.

Hope you're all having a lovely gf Mother's Day 🙂

Wow Day 20 the numbers are adding up nicely 🙂