My Diary - Day by Day

Day 28 - 17/11/16

4 weeks x

Day 29 - 18/11/16

OH still been gambling. Watching last night making me more tempted x

Deposited spent £70

We'll done on 4 weeks Hun, showed u can do it again. OH gambling was my downfall too. It's so hard isn't it. Only £70. Let it go xx

When are you two actually going to get a grip? I dont see any great effort to change anything coming from either of you. I also dont see how going a few days, weeks before gambling again proves anything other than that you are both in the grips of addiction. As for its only £70, im gobsmacked!
If you both want to gamble, then go gamble, i have no issue with anyone who wants to do so. But if you both want to stop, which i have seen no sign of thus far. Then actually do something about it, other than moaning about losses & then slapping each other on the back for your success in your(& i use this term very loosely) recoveries.

Now no doubt people will think im being mean. If so, i dont really care. This is a bad joke. Take some action before there is no way back.

Wow. If you don't like it day@time don't read and feel free to take your criticism else where. Must feel good up on that high horse and speaking down to others whose personal lives you know nothing about. We come on here for support, not a lecture. Your post has had no impact on some other than 'how do I close my account'? Can't speak for wants2stop. Hope you're ok chick and not feeling isolated.

Hello wants2stop,

Well done for acknowledging your slip up.

It can be useful to reflect on slip-ups in case it helps you to identify any patterns, for example it sounds like you've identified that watching your partner gamble increased the feelings of temptation that you were experiencing. When you notice something that hinders your recovery, it can be worthwhile to think about how you might avoid that trigger in the future, or if it is inavoidable how you might respond differently to it next time. If one of your choices might be to watch your partner gamble, what other choices might make it easier for you next time? Scheduling your time with activities that take your attention away from gambling is a common recovery method.

As rednow has said, focus also on how you succeeded during those 4 weeks that you were gambling free, in particular anything you were doing that was helping you to succeed during that time. You can also use those weeks as evidence that you can live your days without gambling. Hopefully your honest record on the forum can help you to become more aware of what helps and what hinders and with that learning you can be in a stronger position to take appropriate actions to support your recovery even more successfully.

Take care,

Forum Admin.

I have to say I agree with day@atime his post may be harsh but it well intentioned. It might not be what you want to hear but it's the truth.

I have always read your diary and have not commented for a long time as I can't say anything that had not already been said several times. You are stuck in a cycle and it's not getting better. I believe you have the best intentions to stop but as the old saying goes if nothing changes nothing changes.

Once I saw your post saying you was watching your partner the night before I had a feeling you would gamble. I do sympathise that gambling is being flaunted in your face. You do need to find a solution to this, I wish I had a practical block for you but I can't think of one. You have to find some strength in you to deal with this temptation, I work in an environment where it is mention in and around me several times a day, it does not seem to tempt me back in I don't know why maybe it's the mindset I have developed through GA or the fact I know it would be a disaster and I don't want to go back to that hell hole.

I'd love nothing more than to see a sustained gamble free run that might just develop into a new way of life. Only you can do that support is out there you just need to go and find it.

KTF

Hi chick

Am still here if need to chat x this time of year can be stressful so stay safe and hope ur ok xx

Happy holidays Hun xx

Happy new year chick

Miss you but hope your absence is because you are doing just fine xx best wishes and happiness xx

Day 0 - 6/1/17

Time to pull my head out of the sand and to start again.

Hi red. I am back. Glad to see you are not judging me. Yes it's support we need not criticism. I know I am in a rut but I don't come here to be chastised and to feel worse than I already do. Trust me people don't have a clue about my life x on another note hope you are all good. Had a good Xmas and new year. Good to see your 3 weeks gamble free xxxx

I already know how f****d up my life is and how s**t I feel about myself. I really don't need other people to state the obvious and make me hate myself more! On another note Thanks admin for the supportive message

Yay! Welcome back chick. I would never and am not in a position to judge or hand out self assured advice to anyone! Lol. And just to be clear to anyone else reading, I'm not lolling because it's a joke and not taking this seriously, more because I know my flaws and am done beating myself up for them - it doesn't help, a light heart is a healthier view point.. As long as I know I haven't given up on giving up, that's enough to know I want to improve.

Again, so glad to see you back and taking control again 🙂 Big up 2017!! Woop Woop xx