My Recovery

Hello Drew

Many similarities: been gambling for around ten years, like horse racing but will gamble on anything.

Nearly half the Premier League teams are sponsored by gambling companies - there's a reason for that. Think I'm right in writing that the Premier League itself isn't allowed to be sponsored by a gambling company - they sponsor just about every other league to compensate - which is about the only restriction these companies currently have put on them. Word is that European shirt sponsorship by gambling companies rose by 180%(!!!) in just one year.

It isn't cheap.

The industry invest millions to make billions. Football being as popular as it is unpredictable is perfect to lure people in. My biggest football bet was a £600 single bet on a seemingly surefire 1/6 shot.

They didn't even draw. Lost 1-0.

My long-winded point is: it's going to be impossible to not see gambling adverts when watching most sports. The adverts like the addiction, cannot be ignored. I've found having a daily routine, keeping busy and using the forum daily keeps me from spinning my way out of orbit.

It can do the same for you.

Best wishes

Glint

Hey Glint,

Thanks very much for the comment mate - It means a lot,

Completely understand exatly what your saying re the gambling companies - They arent going anywhere and their affialation with sports is just going to increse and increase - Jeez my team up in Scotland play in the Championship - (See what that league is properly called and who sponsors it?!) I need to be bigger than that and have more mental strengh to NOT gamble.

Spot on with having a routine - For months I was living on the mantra of ''Today I will not Gamble, I will eat Healthy and Exercice'' To be honest, it was working well and I was doing each every day - I had too! But one little bit of switching off makes me go back to the bad old days.

I think you are right about keeping busy mate, thats usually when I falter - When im bored. Need to address that.

I never slept well last night - Kept thinking about wasting that £180 - Thought to myself though what if I won £180 would i feel different - I know i'd just be looking at the Grand National 'form' for today, getting together a football coupon for today and figuring out if i would back Anthony Joshua or Charles Martin for tonight - My point is, its all betting credit - Its never money or winnings to but clothes or a treat - It would just be credit to bet again today and then tomorrow and then Monday - I cant stop with a win, i'd have to win more - So losing £180 and not betting today will actually have saved me money hopefully than if I was to win yesterday - Thats just messed up.

I am strong today though, I know ive messed up, I need to let it go - I can still live reasonably confortably this month and next if i stick to my plan and DO NOT gamble - I really dont want to right now but I have to remember this feeling (Why is it the compacency creeps in as the months go on? As the Gamble free Years go on I hope it gets better or will I always want to Gamble throughout my life?) Some soul searching still I think.

Anyhow, after today that will be day 1 and I need to live with my mantra ''Today I will not Gamble, I will eat Healthy and Exercise'' Starting now with a bowl of Porridge and some exercise later.

I hope you are well in your own head Glint and positive about the future - As someone said to me recently this life isnt the dress rehearsal - Most people (Including myself) live their life like they have another one in the bank so can afford to mess this one up. But we cant 'This is it' - We have to make it the best we possibly can - If thats a new Job, Better Health, a New Home, A Partner - We have to make it better and the number one way of doing that seems to be easy - 'Not to gamble'. It'll happen my friend - All the best to you,

Drew

Thank you for your post to me Drew.

Did put a lot of effort into applying for that job, passed everything but can't change my past.

You're in a good situation with your life. To protect what you have you must fight this addiction. My circumstances are a bit extreme: gambling to the point of being homeless. Most people will have family to stop that from happening, I have been very fortunate to have had good girlfriends help me out of bad situations every time.

On the plus side, I've never had much to lose. It must be devastating for people who lose a fiance, good job and nice life.

Don't let that be you.

Remember what's really at stake.

Letting go of losses is a perennial problem. I try to not think as much about my losses and try to concentrate on not adding to them. It sometimes helps. I have similar thoughts about what I could of done with the money I've lost. My situation is what it is, I know gambling won't help me - it's all I've tried for over ten years. It's tough when the comforting thought of gambling my way out persists. I know it won't be easy but I'm here to work hard, change my life and try to help others.

I think I'll always want to gamble. It's a question only you can answer when you learn about yourself and your addiction.

Absolutely right about life. Odd as this might sound, one thing I do to keep busy is to walk around a cemetery. It gets me away from the hustle and bustle of daily life, it's calm, peaceful, respectful atmosphere surrounded by beautiful trees and wildlife. It makes me grateful for my life and reflect on how I'll be remembered.

I've never gambled when I've visited a cemetery. It leaves me sad but determined to make the most of the life we're all lucky to have.

Diary,
It's been a while,
How i wish I kept updating you these last few months,
Was doing well, reaching around 100 days but the last few days have been terrible, Lost around £650 money I couldn't afford to lose,
Gutted!
Was doing right well too, but complacency crept in and I was weak - Low and behold the chasing happened, all those horrible feelings came back - How I've not missed them.
Gutted!!
Will come back stronger, will not let this beat me,
It's a marathon not a sprint, but really feel I've let myself and my partner down,
It was all online, slots and roulette. I used to bet on anything but don't look and horse racing, football anymore, it's just the online slots now I need to work on - Will download Gamblock, Didn't like K9, didn't work well on my phone,
Need to get my barriers up again and get my triangle sorted.
Was in such a good place too, but this has really left me... You guessed it, Gutted!
Just super down right now,
Need to get a plan of action but I know gambling just leads to destruction - NO GOOD AT ALL WILL EVER COME FROM GAMBLING...
I know this and believe it so much but it's just that small opening in my brain that allows it, total complacency.
Bordom is always a trigger, need a proper healthy addiction to keep the slots at bay,
I turn 30 next year so I must really stop this for good, getting married too next year, big year, so gambling needs to do one!
I'm definitely better than previous,
This year I've lost around ВЈ1000, last few years that figure was around £6000 yearly... I know I need no money to be lost from gambling, everyone's recovery is different and I do feel I am on the path, I've just momentarily drifted away from it. I will get back on it and stop for good. I will learn from this relapse, I'll take all the feelings I'm experiencing now and make them positive.
Gamblock and daily diary entry's!
So day 0 today,
Gutted, gutted, gutted,
Drew

Day 9 Gamble Free -

Going along well - All my barriers are strong and my will power is on determained mode also,

Long may it continue -