NEW DAWN , NEW DAY , FEELING GOOD !

Alan

Well done on the 480 days, the expected grandchild and the fact that your 21 year old son is busy studying with his dissertation. All uplifiting news and reason to see a bright light in the future. Believe me when you first hold that grandchild it is a truly magical moment and they give you so much pleasure and actually can make you keep up your fitness levels, or so I have found!! I have read your posts and life can be so hard and some awful family situations can be thrown at us at random times but you seem to cope well. I wish you and your family good luck for 2017.

Happy new year my old mucka.
I was wondering when you would make an appearance?

Im not sure I'm less jokey if I'm honest maybe more to the point?
I'll put it down to severe carb flu
I explained to Oddat its basically when you don't eat carbs
You get really angry lol

I'm all good anyhow in fact I'm in the best place I've been for a while. And 142 day's is on the horizon.

Good to see my old mate chucking out some post's and that you are doing well.

Peace out
And big kisses
Don't be a stranger

Hey Alan, good to see you around again, you posted on my diary in my first few days GF and it really helped so just wanted to pop over and say thank you....It's because of yourself & others on this forum that I'm gaining strength everyday that passes...29 days & counting & I'm learning to let go of the past, concentrate on today & welcome the future.

Please keep coming back, you have no idea how much you help people like me.

M x

No the title was named by my little girl from her favourite book's.
It was that or my little boys book Billy Blue hat lol. I'm guessing you possibly have never heard of either?
Anyhow less about me when are the dog's getting to eat those old bones? What's the date of the op

Hi Alan,

Happy New Year buddy, hope that it was a good one and that your son's dissertation is nearly ready to go and benefitted from the sacrifice of a night out! When you're hobbling around on crutches is it called a hip-hop?

Hi, Alan,

Your post on "Forbidden Words" was hilarious. Hope you're as mobile, pain free and well fed as possible as soon as possible.

BW,

CW

I agree with CW. Probably one of your finest 🙂

Thanks for your kind words and support on my diary mate - you are right that trying to do right by our parents is how we pay them back for everything they did for us. I know my Dad would be expecting me to do as much as I could. However, finding the balance is the challenge at the moment, and getting the time for myself as well as supporting mum is the challenge.

On the plus side, it's the first five-a-side game of the year on Thursday night, and that is a great stress reliever and a lot of fun, so looking forward to that. As for your dance moves - we blokes don't need them, just stand and tap your foot and nod your head is how I dance!

All the best.

B.u.g.g.e.r. !
Your a poet and don't know it !
Seriously Alan. ...it was so lovely..I've never had a poem written for me .....
THANKYOU for being round when it was needed most ....
I know life's manic for you at the mo. ..and I'm being selfish ....but you are missed....
But...one thing we've all learnt in this game is ...a man's got to do what a man's got to do....
Catch up soon x

Yo Mr fish...
Thought id flip over and tell you...eho visit all good....perfect 5 and a pat on the back for efart !
Hope all good with you and yours...catch up soonies x

Hi there bud Happy Proclaimers Day

ita been a while I'm sure you're out there getting on with life and hopefully enjoying the freedom that not gambling for 500 days has given you. May you always be 15 days in front of me.

As always it's been a pleasure to walk these 500 days with you, and I will 500 more, to be that man who walked 1000 days with you

KTF

I wish there was a "LOVE" button to press for that last comment KTF. Such inspiration to folk like myself. You're amazing guys x

ALAN 135 wrote:

Thanks for all your kind messages Deano , Tri, Hs, Martin , Loxxie , Anon , Rach , LB , Ryan and Tommy and sorry I haven't got back to you all before now , hope you all had a great " Crimbo " and wishing you all lots of love and Happiness in the new year :)) !.

Dear diary , It's been a couple of weeks since my last post and that's just down to me feeling a little strange of late , couldn't put my finger on it if I'm honest but the thing I wished for most when I had my last bet over 480 day's ago and joined this forum was " To get my life back " and be " Normal again " whatever that was supposed to mean ? and it's taken me a while to realise that I've been granted my wish :)).

The gambling is non exisitant and all thought's of said gambling happen far to infrequently to worry about , their more like fleeting moments of recollection of something " I used to do " which makes me feel almost fraudulent at times when I'm on here these day's reading of the daily struggles of a lot of my Gamcare family , that being said it wasn't always like that and I'm only too aware of how those urges can strike without warning and for no reason at all some day's . My life these day's is for all intense and purposes "Normal again" and "gamble free " , which although a fantastic feeling also brings the up's and down's of a " Normal life " but for a life which I'm no longer self medicating by visiting my long term " Doctor or " Therapist " who still resides at most high street bookmakers and who in my gambling day's of old would have eased the pain of those up's and down's albeit temporary ! .

Gambling never actually solved anything for me , it distracted me , gave me some alone time to shut the problem out but it was never the " Magic wand " that made everything better that I spent so many years giving it credit for , it was just a Devil that promised so much but that delivered so little and alway's whispering in my ear that " Tommorow would be my Day " but thankfully I've woken to the fact that " Tommorow " with addiction will always be " Groundhog day " !! .

So what about about now dear diary ? Well , now I choose to face the " Normal daily problems " that come at me , the up's and down's of " Normal life " head on ! , someday's they still scare the Sheeeite ! outta me but I'm not after a quick half hour consutation with Dr addiction to calm my fears anymore , instead preferring to deal with things as they happen , accepting that I can't control everything life chucks at me but that sometimes I have to find compromise and more so that I have to accept that compromise .

The whole Fosterkid issue that has been at the front of my mind for sometime is one such compromise , the court's desicion to split them up has not sat well with me but I have to accept that in a sometimes unjust world it will be the only way forward given the circumstances , my partner and I can only do what we can do to make the stay with us enjoyable until the time comes for them to move on to long term adoptive parents , theyv'e all had a great Xmas and been spoilt rotten , so hopefully some good memories will have been implanted for them carry through life in the future :)) .

2017 will bring much change for myself as well , with the latest news on my Hip operation now taking place in Febuary , which will hopefully have me running around like a spring chicken by July when I will become a Grandad or PoP's for real, courtesy of my darling Daughter , when she first told me I thought " Jeez " now I am getting bleedin old but I'm absolutely made up , especially for her and my son in law , My daughter has suffered since she was 15 with a condition that could have meant she was unable to have children , so this news is all the more wonderfull for that fact alone , she and her husband are currently in the Brecon beacons having a new years break in a cottage , so I've warned her not to do anything too stupid ! .

This new years eve feels a little different from all the others , as I'm sat here typing my partner's not feeling so well , sore throat for a couple of day's ( woman flu ) , so a quiet night it will be . My son's upstairs working on a dissertation of 5000 words which has to be in by Jan 10th , so for a 21 yr old not having been out all over xmas or this New yrs Eve I take my hat off to him , as that's dedication :)) but they'll be other New years Eve's for us to enjoy I'm sure as there's always a future out there waiting for us if we want it , 480 day's of being gamble free have allowed me to not change my future but have enabled me to shape it more in my favour , in such a short time thing's have altered course and I truly feel taken a completely different path than the one I thought I'd been destined for and I feel truly blessed to have been gifted a second chance .

To anyone who rerads this who is perhaps just starting out on this forum in search of a way out of the cycle of destruction we all aim to be free of , I'd just like to say say that " To want Change , you have to make Change " , " Everythings possible " !!!!!!.

To all the " Gamcare Posse " Old and New , I wish you a very "Happy new year" in 2017 .

My name is Alan and I'm a "Compulsive Gambler " 480 day's Gamble free !! xx

good last post Alan. how have you been since??? Sorry not posted more to support but been struggling with my recovery and GA a little. things settled down a bit now thankfully so i can start offering support a bit more now.

A somewhat sheepish hello to my favourite man to throw my toys at..

I have so much admiration of people who foster / adopt. The beauty of humanity at its helm. My bro adopted a little smiling assassin a year or so ago and from afar I saw the beauracracy of social services. Must be so hard, I really do take my hat off to you.

A hip replacement any time isn't something I can fathom, so to be going through that in the sh.tty month of January must be so hard. So, im trusting your using the knowledge you've gained from addiction recovery in your new physical recovery... ie taking it slowly and accepting any help from friends / family.

Keep frying, I wish you well

Hope all ok my booty ..