Quitters win

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signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 

Thank you so much for the reply. It helped me loads.

 
Posted : 14th October 2018 2:01 pm
boxingdayfresh
(@boxingdayfresh)
Posts: 921
 

Thanks for your post on my diary. You speak a lot of truth and I’ll try to remember what you’ve said, it’s helped me get a new perspective on the debt. How did u go about starting telephone counselling if you don’t mind me asking you ?

 
Posted : 14th October 2018 9:11 pm
sjw
 sjw
(@sjw)
Posts: 574
Topic starter
 

I jumped fully into blocks and support networks. I think i posted way back on here at my attempt to go to a GA meeting right at the start of my journey! I just looked around for all the help or possible support i had open to me.

Once i'd told people everything and with what felt like nowhere else to hide i thought, why keep trying. That was my time to admit i was beaten and i was powerless against the draw of zoning out my days in my gamblers world.

I found an organization called Breakeven that offered counselling and sent them an email asking if i would qualify for counselling. They text me back that evening on a Sunday asking for a time they could call me back to get my story and go through the questions about my history and current state of gambling.

I got told i would be able to get 12 free phone sessions of 1 hour each week and i arranged the time and day with the lady i spent them calls talking to. I was always a nervous speaker on the phone so i was a little scared that that would be my means of telling a stranger my dark secrets but it worked out fine and i found it easier as the sessions and time went on. It also felt like another person to be accountable to. To share my early success with and to question who i am and why i gambled.

Big ramble to a simple question but hey im more of a talker these days xD

All the best.

 
Posted : 15th October 2018 9:34 pm
boxingdayfresh
(@boxingdayfresh)
Posts: 921
 

Thanks so much for the info about your counselling and how you got involved. I’m really tempted to try it as I think it will help and the accountability to someone would be good. I’ll have to give it some serious thought ...

 
Posted : 16th October 2018 5:20 pm
sjw
 sjw
(@sjw)
Posts: 574
Topic starter
 

Thanks for the messages guys.

Day 400

Managed to cut my outgoings down after switching a few things around with no loss to a normal day. Im good at maxing out my wages to allow myself to pay debts, live and save while still managing to not feel like im missing out on anything.

Its a long way from the £16 a month i was left with in the first 6 months. I needed that time to dent the debt, give myself room to breathe and a chance to be offered credit at a much better rate for the longer term. The interest rate was harsh when i began and to be honest i wasn't far enough in to my recovery to want to get 'out there'. Im on a higher wage with lower outgoings now (obviously as i haven't been gambling).

Lifes moved on and im doing well. Im slowly building the new, happy me. One day at a time.

All the best.

 
Posted : 31st October 2018 8:57 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 

Keep on keeping on my friend.

Huge congrats on the 400 mark :o)

 
Posted : 31st October 2018 9:34 pm
(@adam123)
Posts: 2926
 

Well said mate and well done on 400 an inspiration to me as allways, adam

​

 
Posted : 13th November 2018 9:45 pm
Aum
 Aum
(@aum)
Posts: 3947
 

Belated congratulations sjw on passing the 400 day mark. Please forgive me for missing that wonderful milestone.

I find it very heartwarming to see you rediscovering your life. You have consistently shown great courage and fortitude even on the days you maybe felt a little sad.

GamCare is a great tool in our fight. GA has helped many compulsive gamblers. Self exclusions and handing over finances are also helpful.

BUT

At the end of the day, it is us and us alone who must travel this lonely road. A sense of purpose, self belief and integrity are of paramount importance if we are to wrestle back control. In the darkest moments of the darkest nights we have only ourselves to stand up and fight for our freedom. You have done that and I respect and applaud your efforts. Keep blazing that trail my friend ... stephen

 
Posted : 17th November 2018 9:12 pm
Vin47
(@vin47)
Posts: 73
 

Well done sjw. Your story is an inspiration for people like myself just starting on a GF journey.

 
Posted : 24th November 2018 6:30 pm
sjw
 sjw
(@sjw)
Posts: 574
Topic starter
 

Thanks for all the messages guys. Read and appreciate all the support and guidance i receive on here. Its humbling to be called an inspiration but im very keen and happy to share my success espically if its helping others to see that little spot of light in the distance. Im just a normal guy like any of you.

Day 424

Finished my working week today, a 5 hour shift to end a 50 hour working week. Its a long week when i have to do that extra half day every 3rd weekend. I've fallen asleep on the sofa before 9pm a couple of times this week! Im already noticing its a getting a little harder to drag myself out of bed in the dark mornings when my alarm goes off at 5:30am. Back to it Monday.

Im lucky to be in a good position today. I have my worries and negative thoughts at times but thats life. The happiness in my heart far outweighs these now and i've still a long way to go.

A nice weekend spent with family. Bought a new coat, new boots and had a takeaway for tea. Still thrifty but i know i can treat myself sometimes and i shall.

Have a good weekend all, we can build that better life for ourselves by not gambling. One day at a time, always.

All the best.

 
Posted : 24th November 2018 9:28 pm
(@adam123)
Posts: 2926
 

Hey sjw yep there are times when we have negative thoughts but with that we have positive ones too. We strive to better ourselvesthru this challenge of not gambling... Ive felt that at times even when I'm on holiday from work I feel down about my life, I want to escape, by drinking or playing poker , anything to feel a release of stress after a busy work life. I know that wont help me but I am forced to c it as a outlet. I am struggling thru these thoughts at present but ive just watched a film and I think overall I'm lucky and happy and I shouldn't wish for anything else to make me happy. Well I'm just rambling but I hope that makes some sense. Think what I'm trying to Sa is we should all be grateful for

​

 
Posted : 10th December 2018 10:11 pm
Sarahs16
(@sarahs16)
Posts: 217
 

Thanks sjw for your comment and support on my diary. I intend to take life one day at a time. 69 days gf today.

I too will continue to follow your journey. All the best,

Sarah

 
Posted : 13th December 2018 9:40 am
sjw
 sjw
(@sjw)
Posts: 574
Topic starter
 

Thanks Adam and Sarah. Hope your both doing well. Yea, i have a lot to be greatful for really. I work long hours but im lucky i have a job that gives me an income i can live around if i make the right choices. I have a close family and support when i need it to name just a few.

Day 446

Just a little update while i've got 5 minutes. REALLY busy week, another 50 hour one working Monday-Saturday (just a half day Saturday though). Followed by a night out last night for our staff Christmas party means i've not really stopped all week and tomorrow im back to it. Had a good night, got home around 3am pretty drunk so today was a recovery day for more than just the gambling! Im not a drinker at all normally, i could easily not drink ever with no effort but i do get involved and enjoy myself on these occasions.

Bought myself some new clothes as a treat on Saturday. Today i went out with family for a meal for lunch at a turkish restaurant which was really nice and very much needed! Then i had a wonder around the shops in the afternoon.

Working Monday and Tuesday this week before breaking up for Christmas until 27/12/18 so a much needed rest is in sight (although i need to finish my Christmas shopping). That will give me some time to chill and enjoy it this year which is nice.

All the best everyone.

 
Posted : 16th December 2018 8:20 pm
sjw
 sjw
(@sjw)
Posts: 574
Topic starter
 

Day 449

Today was the first of 8 days off work for Christmas. I've had such a lazy day, i've done nothing and feel so much better for it. Got a few things i want and need to do but im going to enjoy the time off and rest up as much as i can. Its my chance to slow down and enjoy this time of year with family. Last year i only got Christmas Day off so im lucky this year that my new job allows me this time.

No gambling today.

All the best everyone.

 
Posted : 19th December 2018 7:47 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 

Hi

Great to hear that youre enjoying your Christmas break and you had a good time at your works do.

Like sandra I am always/have always been vulnerable around this period but you know what... I've never been part of a forum like this before around this period and it's given me so much strength this time round.

With ongoing support of each other we slowly turn our lives around. We are all pushing towards the same goal the boulder is less daunting to move when we all muck in together.

Enjoy Christmas and New Year

 
Posted : 22nd December 2018 12:38 pm
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