Sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Thanks Trigger, yeah sad times, but we can change!

Another day gamble free, and in the middle of wiping my ipad, another positive step.

Hope all well folks.

Hi gav

Well done

Keep going

Stay strong and positive

Suzanne x

Hi Gav,

Well done for making positive progress in trying to kick gambling out for good. It's not a life that you would want for your family, and you have set yourself some very good goals in the first post.

Even if you can't achieve all of them straight away, keep plugging away, and make sure that avoiding gambling is one that you stick with. It isn't always easy, but it is possible.

All the best

Ryan

Thanks guys , still no gambling, v busy in work and off next week, when i'll need this site big time, but feeling optimistic right now, sleeping well, still the w*f have i done thoughts and woe is me for having no money and debt to pay off but i got myself into this mess i'll get myself out, should have debt cleared for XMAS if i stay on the reels bad pun i know,

Have a good week end folks, time for work urgh

Hi Gav,

just wanted to say thanks for the note on the K9 software. Ill look into it, and of course I will follow your diary, please feel free to follow mine. Of every one I have read on here, your story is the most uncannily similar to mine - honestly I could almost have written some of your previous posts word for word myself.

I sympathise - especially on the home life front, if you have a difficult relationship in the mix with gambling as well its a brutal combination. It means you cannot confide at home and you end up dealing with this alone, and for me at least it meant that gambling was part of my "other" life where I got to let off steam. It is of course entirely wrong to associate gambling with letting off steam or being some sort of outlet, as it only makes yet more problems - but I think thats what I let it become.

Stay strong mate. Keep checking in and keep your head up. I will try to do the same.

FM.

Hi FM,

No problems , sure try it out , it helps a lot of people and is free, which is nice.

Well done on starting up a diary as well , if your tempted or think of gambling log on and read some posts it will soon pass.

Yeah the letting of steam was partially due to relationship problems (also other factors boredom etc etc), i was escaping from my life , going into zombie mode, spin after spin. Was it yourself that wrote in the past about the Shop of FOBT's where everyone was that sucked in, then even when one guy won 200 or so he didnt even smile or stop, just kept on spinning?

Its so true, the gambling ad's wouldnt like to feature that would they! Ha Ha would be good if they would!

One thing I've learnt which is highly important is to find something to replace gambling and that buzz! It really needs to be looked at, whether your into sport, films, cooking, programming , photography, whatever, we need something else in our lifes.

I've done a few things for a group on my laptop which was rewarding, and im planning on some sport next week. V good for the old endorphins etc.

Take Care all.

One thing I didnt say on my last post. I;ve been working hard all day but should get deadlines out of the way without me having to stay late, and the thought comes into my head, "hey have a drink tonight to celebrate" then brain things onto , hmm what will i drink, should i get wine in beer spirits, almost already planning everything out! This would in turn lead to gambling thought after alcohol intake ! Suddenly I thought NO wise up , no drinking, just going to chill tonight home made lasagne garlic bread and watch some tv, then busy day tom helping my dad, then watch some footy.

Sorry this doesnt make much sense but it s what was in my head earlier and I needed toget it down.

Cheers for your comments gav -and yup that was me that said that. I don't know why it didnt make me stop gambling then and there, it was just such a somber scene everyone in like you called it "zombie mode" I remember weird stupid details like there was one guy swearing in what I think was Greek, and another guy had jeans on with white paint spilled on them like he'd just finished decorating and then decided to go and sit on a FOBT for three hours as an after thought. All with that same look ... The stupid thing is *i* probably had the same stupid look on me too.

It's a staggering thought that this is happening 24/7 in bookies around the country -I'm also surprised the more I read on here that so many of us are saying the same thing, a few of the diaries mention a bet on the footie or horses but the vast majority is the same thing - FOBTs (a lot seems to be roulette) and online casino slots. When I hear about britains "credit nation" or suchlike I now wonder just what percentage of it is down to the rise of online casino slots in recent years ? -I know we can't blame others for our weaknesses and all that, it's oh choice but it does seem a very targeted and aggressive piece of industry.

Anyway mate I'm hijacking your diary ! -I fully agree with your views on filling the void gambling leaves -ill try to do that.

I hope the lasagne and garlic bread went down well - slipping into a food coma is far more preferable to slipping into our former choice of oblivion !

Stay well and enjoy a gamble free weekend

FM.

Drunk v drunk temptation is there but I promised to log in still gamble free keep well everyone

Gav

thanks for popping by my thread and th every kind words you wrote fella.

I am humbled greatly by the wonderful things recovery throws my way,all through making a choice,which for me leads to better life choices all round.

Well done for logging in,this forum and Ga have been such a good place for me,full of like minded folk who all want to end the destruction gambling brings to our life.

Keep making the right choice

Abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back

Just checking in myself and saw your post from last night, hope everything worked out ok mate. If you can have a drink and still hold your resolve not to gamble I think you've got to see that as a huge step forwards obviously none of us can afford to get complacent but it sounds like you've made another significant victory to me. Well done on staying gamble free.

FM.

Hi Gav,

Glad you logged in last night instead of giving in to the temptation of gambling, and I hope today's hangover isn't too bad! Three weeks today I intend to have a wee hangover of my own, but until then I'm off the booze.

The drink does lower inhibitions, so hope that it didn't get the better of you later on last night. Well done mate, keep it up.

Ryan

Hi Gav,

Well done on your recovery so far. It's a big thing to realise the problem and tackle is head on.

It's a rocky road recovery with lots of ups and downs, just keep chipping away each day and posting on here when you hit a low point.

Just out of interest, does that K9 work on Iphone and how does it work. I never used to gamble on a phone but after my laptop broke I started to go on slots on it. Does it replace safari?

Keep up the good work mate,

James

Today would have been a week but I f*** ed up last night had no thoughts of gambling until the 2nd bottle of wine then I just found a complete weird site which actually charged me to deposit I actually told myself this is wrong I can't do this but th e ***** booze f In I'm so annoyed , 300 in an hr lost I didn't win a think which is good , but I can't work out why I did it I still don't know , always follows the same pattern , wife at work alcohol and free time ! The only thing that could have stopped it was k9' which will be set up Thursday when I see my counsellor , yeah it replaces safari so u have to disable safari which requires a 4 digit number so u need someone to set it up obviously ! So I'm back to square one got wife's birthday and car insurance this month and didn't need that hit ?! B***** I hate myself fir being so f in stupid ! Today was a great day played golf in morning then round at wife's folks for family get together had home made pizzas and a good laugh and spent next to nothing ! Why do we do this to ourselves it's almost like cutting ourselves inflicting pain on ourselves it's nuts ! Anyway I'm back to day 1 and I'm still determined years ago I wouldn't have written a post if I relapsed I'd just leave the site! Urgh hateful addiction

Gav.

Gutted for you fella. My heart sank as I read that post, I really feel for you mate it could just as easily have been me or any one of us. Try not to punish yourself too much, from what I've read so far it seems recovery is a rocky road with both achievements and setbacks. At least in this instance it was just a couple of hours before you stopped yourself this time it wasn't an all night session that ran up the kind of losses you've experienced in the past.

The positive of course is that you've come straight back here, picked yourself up and started again so your resolve to quit is not broken. That shows strength. Start again mate, dust yourself off and get back onto the wagon, hopefully the next GA session can put this straight in your head and you'll get that block in place which will be one more little piece of armour plating in the shield you are building up.

Look forwards now not back, and ill expect you to post on my diary and kick me up the a**e if I slip as well.

Take care mate, and keep on keepin on.

FM