It’s been a while since I’ve been on this site but I’m ready to come back and commit to stopping. The last few months have been the same routine of getting paid, losing everything and spending the rest of the month skint, also taken out a couple loans. Tonight I hit a new low point, I spent my money which was meant for rent. Been trying to get another loan but it’s not looking good. I still live at home and my mum should be able to help me out, but I feel awful doing this to her. I signed myself up to gamtop and banned myself for 5 years. Hopefully it works, if anyone reading this has gamstop, have you found it reliable? for the last time, day 1.
Hi.. and yes gamstop is reliable. Once registered you can't gamble at any casino registered with the gambling commission. They are required to register by law. Clearly you could put fake details in but then you wouldn't get paid out, cos they are required to confirm your identity, residence etc. You might want to also install blocking software such as Gamban, its free through gamcare.... ie another layer of protection.
I have lived a similar existence to you on and off for many years. Its daft isn't it.
All the best.. S.A
Well done on admitting your problem. Yes i agree with S.A get blocking software installed. The best thing i ever did was tell my husband last week. He was amazing. He has taken over the finances now. I feel very ashamed and embarrassed but I cannot gamble without any money. I hid this from him for 14 years and it only bought me misery. Tell your mother please i’m sure she will help. It’s going to be painful yes but in the long run you will feel better take my word for it.
Hi, yes gamstop is reliable and also I agree with others, get blocking software to all your devices. I have gamban and I've been happy with that. But there are others to choose from too. Take it one day at a time and keep yourself busy. You can do it!
Welcome and here is to the new gamble free life!!
The morning after the night before and filled with that familiar feeling of dread. Thanks for all the replies, I’ll look into getting a blocking software. It was reassuring to wake up to a load of emails telling me my accounts has been suspended. Haven’t managed to get a loan yet. Filled with anxiety about telling my mum, although she already knows about my gambling problem, she doesn’t know how bad it really is. Guess I’ll just see where the rest of the day takes me. Thanks again for the replies, here’s to a better future!
Well done! I urge you to tell her everything. I had the same advice 9 month ago and I didn't take it. It only created more problems with all the debts etc. It will be the hardest thing you will have to do but the best thing you will ever do if you want to save yourself and your family. I've been gambling for 13 years and recently let it all out to my wife. Your family will always help you! I've gone a week and the thought of getting myself into that mess again makes me cringe. You can do it, stay strong and positive. It will lift alot of weight off your shoulders just by talking and letting it all out, trust me.
@aimz98 Lets run the tape through a little and see how that goes. Please stop me if I'm wrong but just see.
You manage to get a loan. It helps you pay the rent, or maybe you try to win back the rent. You might win, you might lose, but you'll leave here and come back when you are in trouble again. Oh, and you still have to pay back the loan. You try to win it, because that's what we do. Win or lose, you'll lose eventually because as a compulsive gambler we can't stop. I can't, it sounds like you can't either.
Or you tell your mum, you don't get into any more debt. She might be mad, she might be supportive, but eventually she'll be supportive. she'll appreciate that you've signed up to Gamstop and have come on here.
Maybe you arrange for her to help look after your access to your money and she knows that you're trying, and it helps you stay off a bet.
Which one of those scenarios sounds better?
Chris.
Hey @chris-uk . I see where you are coming from with the loan but it would’ve actually been more affordable for me than borrowing from my mum. But I guess it will save on the interest and will be one less loan to worry about. But yeah it’s the best thing to do, So I will be telling her, I’d have to pay her back in about 3 months it will be tight but doable. I’ve only ever gambled on online slots, so I’ll be taking out my extra money in cash and just leaving money in the bank for rent and the loans. Thanks for the reply, helped me make the right decision:)
Ah thank you @sensesfail, I will be telling her everything . Glad to hear you’ve gone a week gamble free woohoo. Wish you all the best, we’ve got this:)
Agree 100% with sensesfail i tried for 14 years to stop by myself- blocking, cancelling cards , moving money into a long term ISA , bank account with limits and gambling block but i failed and managed to keep on gambling. My last resort was my husband and i’m so ashamed. He said ‘why didn’t i say sooner’ yes I keep on asking that every day ???? I’m determined to beat this and with his help i will. I tell him everything now ... the urges, ... what i felt whilst gambling.. the morning after feeling... the guilt.. the restarts I promised myself (this restart happened a billion times!!!) my councelling sessions with ARA (through gamcare) start on Monday and funnily enough I can’t wait. Monday is good for me because it is after the weekend which is when i mostly gambled . Keep strong and focused and reward yourself each week with something nice ... a treat ?
Some wonderful advice in the posts above from people who have been there, seen it and done it.
It's great that you've taken it on board and are set to tell your mum the whole truth and to take sensible financial steps. Well done - and please do keep us updated on your progress.
Something Poblwc said really connected with me:
"Keep strong and focused and reward yourself each week with something nice ... a treat."
It's so right - I've been so focused on ensuring that I don't spend money on the wrong things that I haven't given consideration to spending it on the right things, like a treat for myself at the end of the week.
In many ways, those treats are the physical proof that staying GF are positive and worth it.
Hi.
gamstop is reliable but it is so easy to sign up to non uk casinos. Which I did last week and lost a considerable amount of money. Felt so low all week. Good to hear the stories and hang in there
Hi.
gamstop is reliable but it is so easy to sign up to non uk casinos. Which I did last week and lost a considerable amount of money. Felt so low all week. Good to hear the stories and hang in there
Hi.
gamstop is reliable but it is so easy to sign up to non uk casinos. Which I did last week and lost a considerable amount of money. Felt so low all week. Good to hear the stories and hang in there
I'm sorry to hear that, Sean. Have you tried Gamban? I'm not sure if it blocks everything but I know it can cover some areas that Gamstop doesn't.
There's some excellent advice in this thread which is the 'Want to DO Something?' thread in the New Members Intros part of the forum.
For example, you may wish to consider telling someone close to you what's happening and perhaps asking if they will take control of your finances for a while.
The fact that you're here tells me you're tackling this head on and still trying to change, despite your relapse and that's a positive.
Please speak to someone on the live chat or on the helpline if you think it would help and keep talking here. Someone will always be here for you.
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