The support on here is incredible. I purposely checked this thread to see how you were getting on. For me; it got easier. I think I am close to or on 100 days GF and the stage you’re at IMO is the toughest. It’s breaking the habit isn’t it and a week feels like never-ending. We care about you and your progress on here. Bank card blocking is a great way and has fortunately stopped many recent near relapses - which then makes me realise why I have those measures implemented in the first place. To gamble is to lose, it is simple as that. Even if you win when you relapse, you are actually losing. Stay strong, there is a reason why you stopped, continuing to gamble has only one result.
Thank you for the support everyone, I really appreciate it. Yesterday was tough. Really tough but I got through it without gambling. It showed me why I can't do this by willpower alone. The support from everyone here, support from my husband and of course blockers are all part of it.
Today I celebrate 1 week GF!!!!!! 1 week! I'm making pizza for the family as a treat. I have a lot of family birthdays coming up in the next 2 weeks and it feels good to know I will have a bit of money to send little gifts to my young nephews and niece. All because I've made the decision to stop.
Let's keep going, we can do this!!
I'm feeling so much better tonight. Had a really strong urge to gamble again but instead I played one of those mindless puzzle games instead. It seemed to do the trick. Plenty of colour, movement, flashing lights and things popping up here and there. Loved it. And I feel really good for not wasting another £100-200 down the drain. Honestly it's just the best feeling.
I hope everyone else is feeling ok today too! Stay strong!!!!!
I had to change my display name because I kept getting an error message that it can't be over 20 letters long. So now its grammatically incorrect ?♀️. Nevermind...
Another GF day done and dusted!
I started gambling seriously about 1 year ago, a few months before the lockdown. It got really, really bad 1 week into the first lockdown. Playing nearly every day. I didn't lose as much as others have but I used every extra penny and even some bill money. It's awful to think of how much I could have saved by not gambling but I try not to dwell on it because I don't want to be tempted to try and win it back and end up chasing losses.....I'm focusing on making sure I don't waste any more of my money on it.
I'm really appreciating everyone's stories here, they motivate me to keep going.
The usual Sunday night stress here, with kids and family and work. Last month I would have turned to slots for comfort but not anymore. Maybe a bit of music will lift my mood.
Goodness, strong urge to play some slots today. Thank god I've got the bans installed. Oh man, just one slot, just 10 pounds......then I'll lose it and chase the loss with another tenner, then another and another...I'd end up 100-200 down as per usual and feel awful for wasting all my money again.
But not today! I will not gamble! I'm going to do something better instead like watch TV ?. I will not gamble. I want to treat the family to a takeaway at the end of the week. So I will not gamble my money.
Anxiety creeping up again due to work. But I will not gamble, it won't solve anything and will just make me feel worse. There are better ways to manage my feelings.
Still gamble-free? How u feeling now? I’m self-isolating and urges stronger than ever now. Like a new fresh tempting urge! Know what i mean? I won’t give in though, the dangers are too obvious and there is no room for complacency around this devilish act.
Ahh we wrote at a similar time!
@beat_gambling_today Haha yes, great minds think alike! ? I'm still GF thank you for asking. 12 days now! The urges are definitely strong still and lockdown means that I don't have my usual distractions available. If I didn't have the blocks in place I wouldn't have made it this far... I keep thinking oh there's no harm in just putting 10 pounds in or 20 and then stopping..but of course I never stop there. So the risks are massive.
The urges are so difficult to manage sometimes.....I play other games online, candy crush style games. That helps usually. Music, TV. Interviews with gambling addicts and recovering addicts.
How are you? Is there anything that has helped you when you get a really strong urge?
@beat_gambling_today Haha yes, great minds think alike! ? I'm still GF thank you for asking. 12 days now! The urges are definitely strong still and lockdown means that I don't have my usual distractions available. If I didn't have the blocks in place I wouldn't have made it this far... I keep thinking oh there's no harm in just putting 10 pounds in or 20 and then stopping..but of course I never stop there. So the risks are massive.
The urges are so difficult to manage sometimes.....I play other games online, candy crush style games. That helps usually. Music, TV. Interviews with gambling addicts and recovering addicts.
How are you? Is there anything that has helped you when you get a really strong urge?
You are absolutely right in saying the risks are massive. I remember my penultimate bet, of course I was chasing my losses but when I won it felt like I lost. As soon as I placed my bet it felt like I was handing my soul over to the bookies - that did it for me bar one more £10 bet 106 days ago. This penultimate bet was off the back off losing £4000 in 2 days. I borrowed £3000 off my mum and yep... I went straight down to the bookies and gambled £500 x 4 on a low odds accumulator to win £3800 (including stake). But it felt like a loss... Anyway morale of the story, what started off as £10 or £20 on my day off work after the dentist ended up being nearly a £4000 loss and it should have been really. I’ve lost around £42,000 in my life on gambling and the money lost is what matters second. This sickening habit never ends well as it breaks everything I ever worked hard towards and secondly never ends with just £10 or £20 being lost. When I feel like betting now I always remember how I felt with those last 2 bets - like handing my soul to the devil. It is real and we will never move forward in life if we carry this on. I may have mentioned before, the method of Postponement works well for me (keep putting a bet off until a later time/date) and also giving 90% of my disposable income to my wife who keeps my money in a 60 day notice savings account - the only way to instant withdrawal is if me or her died lol. Those 2 methods are most powerful for me. A third method is exercising in the gym (awaiting post-lockdown in the uk). Fourth; I also stay away from anything that interested me in betting in the first place - example: used to bet on sports mainly football so even if an advert or news comes on about football I change the channel. Also I don’t look at football games just in case I start wondering about how many goals or corners there might be... So playing Candy crush is this similar type of gaming you lost money on? Is it a good idea? I just stay away from anything alike to what I lost money on. Lockdown is hard but... vary your thinking, eat different foods, cook different, watch different programmes, do different research on what you’re into. It’s all good! Control your mind and you can control the world...
13 GF days!
Normally I would have spent all my money on slots by now. But since I stopped, I actually have some pennies to spend on groceries and even some little treats! I don't have to lie about money anymore. It feels so good. It's such a tiny, basic thing but for a problem gambler like me it feels huge. 1 more day and I will be 2 weeks GF.
2 weeks GF! Actually 14.5 days but who's counting ?
16 GF days now I think. I've been busy with other projects and life goals so I haven't felt any strong urges this weekend.
20 days. I've got a small amount of money due to be paid to my account on Friday and I'm already soooooo tempted to just have a tiny little bit of a try at the slots...... which would of course mean that I'd lose it all again. Keeping busy and occupied seems to be the key for me. So I'm going to put the phone away that night and continue with my work project.
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