Day 88
Still feeling strangely tired still and so crabbit at work........but I'm not gambling so life's not so bad.
I feel really quite sad- my best bud's just phoned- she's been gambling. She's describing feelings I had before- spending money she can't afford, chasing losses, spending hours, lying and generally unhappy with what she's doing. How many times do we say "never again"? I really wish I could stop for her- I know I can't. She mopped my tears when I admitted my problem......it's so frustrating to watch her repeating my mistakes. In some ways, she's blamed herself for my mess (introduced me to online gaming), in some ways I feel responsible for hers (shared "win" details). I hope so much that she does stop this time and I'll help her all I can.
Still no news on son's mortgage. How long does this flaming process take- on tenterhooks still.
Despite being bad tempered at work, I've had a really productive few days and tomorrow's Friday again and time to do some work on a new project with my Friday peeps- so exciting!
Smoking's going better- not completely off managed 1/day for past couple days and more due to greed than need!
"Note to self: I am doing the best I can with all that I have in this moment.
And that's all I can expect of anyone, including me!"
(anon)
Hi Irene
Just read your last post and wanted to share this with you:
As my fav football team latin quote goes:
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum, which is variously translated as:
• Nothing will be sufficient except that which is the best
• Nothing but the best is good enough
• Only the best will do
If we continue to do the best we can do, then we will have a better chance of what we are wanting to achieve.xx
True Feb- we ca't do any better than that 🙂
Day 89
Today I was reminded of how differently my life could've been. Was with a lady who was telling me her history- sooooooooo similar to mine and yet so different. I left her feeling a wee bit spooked.
Her mum was diagnosed with cancer when she was 16- snap!
Her family didnt tell her till after her exams- snap!
She got straight As- snap!
Her mum died shortly after- snap!
Scraped by the next year's schoolwork- snap!
Started Uni- snap!
Left after year 1- snap!
1st son aged 20- snap!
..........and there the similarities ended. She chose one way to cope and I chose a different life. I was blessed with a loving sister who supported me (and still does) and fantastic positive role models in my life. Today just brought home to me how lucky I have been in my adult life and how much I have to be thankful for.
Still awaiting son's mortgage outcome arghhh.......
Day 90-and my birthday!
Been spoiled with gifts and flowers. Son also took me out to lunch with my sister. He also treated me to a manicure 🙂
All in all a special saturday with the added bonus of not gambling!
Happy birthday to you, squashed tomatoes and ---------
Have a lovely gamble free evening
xxx
Hi Irene,
Happy Birthday, u soooo deserve 2 be spoilt 🙂
I hope u enjoy the rest of ur day xxxx
Happy birthday irene have a wonderful day you deserve it xx
Good Evening Irene,
A very very Happy Birthday to you 🙂
Flagg x
Happy Birthday Irene. Hope you ate Enjoying your very special day.xx
Thanks so much for the b/day wishes x
Day 91=13 weeks
Still going strong. Been too busy with family this weekend to think much about gambling which is fantastic 🙂
13 weeks that's amazing thanks for post on my diary,
Keep uo great work
91 days Irene!! How brilliant is that! Seems like you have had a busy Birthday with your family which is great.
I have had a lovely weekend at my sisters and visiting her daughter and husband.
The Lemon Drizzle Madeira cake went down a treat with everyone.
Hope no news is good news for your son - will say another prayer for you both tonight.
Take care and speak soon.
Feb.
Hi irene
Bit late but happy birthday and congrats on your 13 weeks gamble free a huge achievement keep it up.
Irene.
What better a birthday gift to give yourself.
13 continued weeks taking your life back.
That wall between you and your addiction stands tall today
for that be very very proud.
A belated happy birthday
a massive well done from me.
Duncs stepping forward never back.
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
