What a day!

Irene.

Glad to see you putting your thoughts out there, I went through a period were my addiction found what it thought was a chink in the armour, to feed it's dirty self into my sleep, like me I think it will learn you will be sleeping with that stick in your hand!!!

The one that addiction used to beat you with, the one today you use to beat it back!!

Keep hitting it with all you have, the rewards are there for us all to se.

A big well done from me.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi hope ya caught up with some sleep. Wierd dream. I have the odd gambling dream very strange. Like you say tho without gambling you get to enjoy everything else in life, friends, family etc. Glad your still going strong and see ya at the check in tomorrow.

Thanks Guys- it means so much to know it's not just happening to me x

Day 270

Another long day done.....been out the house for around 14 hours. Good news is, there's little housework for Friday- hardly been home to make a mess 🙂

Weekend off ahead- gardening time again methinks and a chillout sunday. Big decision for tomorrow evening......wine or no wine?????

Planning to spend some time at weekend with bestie also.

Best thing of all, no gambling plans!

Day 271

Phew....thank goodness this week's done! Friday afternoon meeting with my boss went much better than expected- its given me lots to consider in terms of personal and service development. I feel so relieved. I get inexplicably anxious when dealing with those "in authority"- crazy really when I advocate effectively for others on a daily basis!

Plans for gardening are ditched- weathers been wet here intermittently. Plans for this evening therefore rapidly changed to wine, chocolate and reading my trashy novel (till I got intrigued reading diaries here!)

No serious gambling urges to report and no further sleep disturbance, so all's good.

Obviously diet's gone to pot today and skipped gym this morning- tomorrow's another day!

Well done Irene, doing mighty fine. Regards... S.A 🙂

Cheers SA

Day 272

Well, a lovely relaxing day for me. Lunch out with son, visited sis then finally got stuck into grass cutting.

Not much else happening.

Hey Irene,

I am very pleased you enjoy your relaxing weekend. Simple things we do, just brings so much more joy and calm to our lives, now we are free from that addiction.

Another day forward, you should be very proud of yourself.I am proud of you, you are such a big inspiration to me.

Wish you to have lovely and relaxing Sunday:)

Take care

Sandra x

Thanks Sandra x

Day 273=39 weeks

All in all I've had a very satisfying weekend. Out again today- this time to the beach with a pal and Paddy, then out for lunch together.

I feel relaxed yet rejuvenated for next week's work 🙂

day 274

One of the most difficult days this year. I don't want to gamble but feel so guilty about the time I wasted doing it when I should've been there for them- instead I was fixated in a virtual world consumed with greed and loss of control. I am so ashamed that I put gambling above those that I love. A whole year has passed and she's coped so well- I wish I could take some of the pain for her.

All I can do is my best now and try to make up for being a crappy friend when they needed me.

Hey Irene,

You have a biggest heart ever, we can't look back, it's past, and we need to concentrate on NOW and FUTURE....You are very good at it, you have got feelings and understanding. Bless your heart, and i'm sure you loved ones sees it by mile...you deserve all the best.

Stay strong darling, keep going....if you stronger - everyone around you is stronger too...

All the best

Sandra x

Hi Irene,

It was nice 2 catch up with u the other nite, u r an amazing person and u r doing brilliant 🙂

U should be so proud of urself u can't change wot's done but u can change the future and that's exactly wot ur doing! Thank u 4 all ur support 🙂

Stay strong xx

hi irene

you keep going from strength to strength and you people like your good self are helping to keep me focused so keep up the great work

thanks friends x

Day 275

Feeling a bit better today. Facing forward once again!

oops- had posted duplicate

HI Irene,

Hope things return to an even keel for you soon, I to sometimes am racked with guilt about all the time i wasted gambling, but i use that as a constant reminder to myself when the urges come.

You cant claw back time but as duncs says the decision you make today will better your tomorrow, and I know you can make some happy memories which might make that guilt ease a little.

Live everyday and enjoy your recovery with your family and friends, you have earnt it.

take care

blondie xx