Winning the battles... Win the war... Life back.

Thank You for sharing and staying strong, it is good that you were able to not gamble to extinction. I don't know if it would have have successful to just get and keep the two hundred. I have done that a couple of times ie. left with an amount that I needed for something despite all the gambling losses that make that small amount seem like nothing. Walking out with that certain amount win a couple times did nothing for me at all! Just kept the doorway open to thinking that I could do it again and as we all know, there is not a drop of certainty of any win and eventually there are so many money draining experiences that we are off worse than before. But yes, of coarse, it is great that you were able to stop. I totally hear you on all the points of your post grip. March 1st will be a marking point for further success . tara2

mate great postive post, this is your diary to write what you choose that will help you. I admire your honesty and courage and what is done is done, it's what you do from here which is right.

Regarding living with debt, i have £6,100 owed to creditors which are in a debt management plan, can you look down this route, might take some stress off if like me you only pay something like £150 back once you have done a budget review, at least interest is stopped. I owe another £3k plus to parents and I have a £1500 overdraft. To cope I have just told myself to stop worrying about it, by not gambling it will be reduced gradually instead of being increased and all my family know my outgoings and support me when I run out last 7-10 days of the month with money for petrol and food. Just write debts down in book and abstain from anymore gambling, easier said than done I know. It's about acceptance of the debt you have and not adding to it moving forward which you know.

You'll be fine my friend, just try to relax and go with the flow, think of thousands of families that have loads of debt and have a mortgage to pay and kids to feed etc etc, they might have loans and credit cards and they can't take the bankruptcy route or start a IVA or DMP for whatever reasons. Just try to accept the debt is there and seek ways of freezing interest with creditors or paying them back smaller amounts which are affordable to you, anything to take the stress away so you don't revert to gambling again, and don't open anymore gambling accounts, that is where you need to show a bit more strength because it is you that chooses to gamble, nobody forces you. Hope that helps.

All the best, Wilsy

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Does grip stand for god rest on peace ?

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Hi mate, thanks for your post.

Yes call Step Change mate, they are a charity and don't charge to set you up a DMP, they are very good. I don't know what you earn but when you go through your budget with them, make things up, say you have pets, you use public services, you smoke etc etc so that there is a little month left to give to your creditors. Paying £153 a month for me has reduced so much stress and the important thing is all interest is stopped, I had one loan and four card. You're offering to pay it all back which to them is better than nothing and if you ever get tight, ie the car goes from etc, you can stop a payment up to 3-4 times a year, I did this in January and February, called them up and told them I needed money to fix my car and for Christmas. Look into it a DMP will help you or an IVA.

Have a good day try and remain strong to urges.

Wilsy

Hi Positive action really glad to see you back and gf now. It’s so easy to slip I understand completely as I nearly did today for the same reasons as you to make the month more comfortable and pay some more debt. I’m getting my hair done tomorrow and that’s rare occurrence as I gambled before instead and hardly ever had money left for hair, clothes etc it really is desperate can’t believe I chose gambling over feeling better about myself but that’s the addiction isn’t it. I wanted to pay some more debts and thought I could win and what will £50 hurt usual gambling devil on the shoulder but I shot it down you will too. Wilsey given fab advice if you took the pressure off yourself a bit like with Step change you’ll probably find the urges easier to handle. Wish you all the best 🙂 Lulu x

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In one of your posts here, grip, you spoke of the comments on a youtube video. Comments can be very triggering, esp. by those who have not been through it. The things people say, and think for that matter argh. Guess that is really none of our business and something that we can not change so let's find serenity and just keep on taking care of our own thoughts, words and behaviors. here here. 🙂 tara2

Hello Positive Action,

Youtube comments in general are full of some c**P that you shouldn't worry yourself about. You are right that anyone that hasn't lived the problem isn't in a position to judge those who have/are. More then that i would just say in life in general that peoples opionons often say more about them then their words say about others. Don't take them to heart. Be true to yourself and listen to what you think of what you are/aren't doing.

With regards to the DMP i see you mention about your worry as to the impact on your credit rating. As you say your rating will be poor anyway and while im not in a DMP myself with my gambling debt i can see the advantages to some. Do you have a reason to worry about the level of your credit rating? Its got to be worth talking to them and asking, no harm in that and if that release of financial pressure can help you in the short and long term it has to be a good thing?

All the best mate.

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