I just joined and was looking for some feedback on what others do.
My addiction is a strange one. I've easily got website blocking working and in over 5 years, have not even been tempted to try. My Achilles heel are the slots and that's in arcades and bookies. Done many thousands of pounds over the years. Fortunately (I guess), I have a good job and only spend what I earn but savings are going down and I'm ashamed to say, my wife doesn't ask enough questions.
I want to quit and have wanted to many times over the last 40 years. I sometimes come up with new schemes to stop me gambling, including giving my wife the money, or having no access to cash but sometimes my scheming has the opposite effect and I lie, much to my shame.
I was wondering if anyone can make it work that they use contactless cards and so able to just cut up the cards that you have? Also, does anyone know if any banks have a limit on cash withdrawals each day and whether it can be imposed (i.e. bank is aware and can help with problem gambling)?
Any other ideas as to how my urges can be distracted or diverted? This is the first time I'm seeking help and honestly, I'm doing it because I'm really quite fed up with all this.
Thanks for reading.
I can relate to your post. I too had a destructive mentality with money and wanted to find a silver bullet to stop the spending.
The only solution that worked for me was to automate all my payments, direct debits and standing orders in my main Barclays account, I then cut up my Barclays current account and savings cards and removed all the banking apps so they weren't visible on my phone. The only app i have visibility of is the starling bank app where I have a small £68 allowance automatically transferred via standing order from my main Barclays bank every Monday. I've learnt to live on this £68 per week whilst my main bank account (Barclays )is automatically paying standing orders, bills and direct debits without me touching it or seeing it.
I contacted Starling and explained what spending restrictions I wanted to put in place with my account and the helped by putting in bespoke restrictions that stop me from unnecessary spending.
Well done for stopping. I’m was the same, giving my daughter money to look after then just asking for it back. I’ve got £300 spending limit on my Barclays cards. You can easily do set it on your online account. Do you go to the casino or were you mainly online gambling?
I was worse with online gambling. I found taking cash out when I got payed helped me to pay food shopping etc I once didn’t pay a bill because I gambled with it. I emailed them the next day with apologies and paid the next week.
Hi
Money was just the fuel for my addiction.
Once I handed over all finances and access to credit it made my recovery more possible.
Once I was able to abstain from unhealthy habits could the healing of my pains start.
I got to understand each time I tried to escape what my fears were.
I could not help my self heal adn recover untill I went to meetings.
On walking in to the recovery program I did not understand how much pain and trauma I was burying in side of my self.
No one or thing could stop me gambling it was all up to me.
Today I am no longer the loner.
I value love and respect my self today.
I no longer want to hurt my self or other people.
For me exchanging every one of my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits was long but very powerful towards my recovery and healing.
Abstaining for me was just the first step in my recovery and my healing.
I can not gain lost time or lost money.
Only once I accept that simple fact made my recovery posssible.
Love healing and peace to every one.
Dave L
AKA Dave of Beckenham.
I just joined and was looking for some feedback on what others do.
My addiction is a strange one. I've easily got website blocking working and in over 5 years, have not even been tempted to try. My Achilles heel are the slots and that's in arcades and bookies. Done many thousands of pounds over the years. Fortunately (I guess), I have a good job and only spend what I earn but savings are going down and I'm ashamed to say, my wife doesn't ask enough questions.
I want to quit and have wanted to many times over the last 40 years. I sometimes come up with new schemes to stop me gambling, including giving my wife the money, or having no access to cash but sometimes my scheming has the opposite effect and I lie, much to my shame.
I was wondering if anyone can make it work that they use contactless cards and so able to just cut up the cards that you have? Also, does anyone know if any banks have a limit on cash withdrawals each day and whether it can be imposed (i.e. bank is aware and can help with problem gambling)?
Any other ideas as to how my urges can be distracted or diverted? This is the first time I'm seeking help and honestly, I'm doing it because I'm really quite fed up with all this.
Thanks for reading.
Hi there DJ,
Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your experience with us.
Have you reached out via our Helpline or Livechat function yet? Our advisers are on hand 24/7 to help offer support and explore options to help you with this. There are exclusions specifically for bookmakers and arcades that they can cover with you, as well as strategies and further support options to help improve your recovery capital.
You can reach out to us via a few different methods here: https://www.gamcare.org.uk/get-support/talk-to-us-now/
Some banks do allow customers to set a cash withdrawal limit but you would need to reach out to your bank to discuss how to do this.
Many thanks
Roxanne
Forum Admin
Hi, thanks for all the replies. I will get in touch. Work keeps me busy and out of mischief fortunately. I’m not one of those people that pine for this every day, but when the urge occurs, it’s all-consuming.
Hope to call in the next few days. And thanks again for sharing your experiences. It’s a big help.
DJ
I just joined and was looking for some feedback on what others do.
My addiction is a strange one. I've easily got website blocking working and in over 5 years, have not even been tempted to try. My Achilles heel are the slots and that's in arcades and bookies. Done many thousands of pounds over the years. Fortunately (I guess), I have a good job and only spend what I earn but savings are going down and I'm ashamed to say, my wife doesn't ask enough questions.
I want to quit and have wanted to many times over the last 40 years. I sometimes come up with new schemes to stop me gambling, including giving my wife the money, or having no access to cash but sometimes my scheming has the opposite effect and I lie, much to my shame.
I was wondering if anyone can make it work that they use contactless cards and so able to just cut up the cards that you have? Also, does anyone know if any banks have a limit on cash withdrawals each day and whether it can be imposed (i.e. bank is aware and can help with problem gambling)?
Any other ideas as to how my urges can be distracted or diverted? This is the first time I'm seeking help and honestly, I'm doing it because I'm really quite fed up with all this.
Thanks for reading.
With addiction what works for me or someone else may not work for you. I could quite easily buy 1 scratchcard and not go back and purchase more...But yet when I played online slots or tables that was it, I wasn't able to control my behaviour. I chased losses and went through dangerous mindsets of thinking I'd win it back but instead dug a deeper hole...Until I stopped.
...For now I've escaped the clutches of my addiction, for how long who knows but just for now, I'm free of it.
I spent years lying about my addiction pretending it didn't exist, it wasn't bad and that I was in control but I never was. I hoped that it would just go away. I'd get that big win that would mean I wouldn't need to chase my losses but reality was the amount needed to breakeven got higher and higher.
The positives - What I did...
I signed up to Gamstop...now on my 2nd cycle 5 years of being blocked by this scheme - I then applied Gamban to all of my devices.
I can't sign up to any UKGC casinos - Along with the Gamban I can't other variety of gambling sites either. As for Arcades I played in them a few times but I could walk away and not go back so it wasn't a crux of my addiction.
I also took up talking therapy in regards to my addiction and discussed my problem in depth.
I also gave my extra money to my other half and had to prove the reason why I would need money to pay a bill or an expense.
By all means I'm not perfect...For now with my addiction I'm satisfied its not an issue and take everything day by day.
I found taking things day by day its a lot easier...I don't promise to be free from gambling forever but..."Just for today I won't gamble" and for me that works and I don't play.
Dear Dj
Our money guidance service may have some useful guidance and ideas for you https://www.gamcare.org.uk/self-help/managing-your-money/
Best Wishes
Fiona
Forum Admin
Hi
I could not trust my self with money or credit cards.
By handing over all finances to my wife made it easier for me.
The simple truth that I did not respect my self or respect money.
Just reading text was not enough for me.
Just abstaining was not enough.
After me abstaining that was the point I needed to do work on my self and start the healing process.
RECOVERY for me means healing the hurt inner child in me.
In time exchanging my many unhealthy habits in to healthy habits was very important.
Healing love and peace to every one.
Dave L
AKA Dave of Beckenham
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