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Last Post by Haley14 7 months ago
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 Haley14
(@42fkjc897o)
Posts: 4
Topic starter
 

My partner of over 12 years has always had a gambling problem and went to therapy some years ago which I believe had helped the issue. However since my daughter was born 2 years ago he has relapsed and our life has come crashing down. He gambles several times a week and when he comes home he wants to be left alone to drink. So now the drinking has become a problem and he rarely goes a day without it. He is severely depressed and I don't know what to do. He has been to counselling recently but has stopped. I am trying to be supportive but I no matter what I do or say he has to be willing to get the help he needs. So at present our relationship is on the brink of collapse and if it wasn't for my daughter I think I wouldn't have stayed so long. I don't know how to help him or if I even can. I feel guilty but I also feel like I'm losing myself. I don't know what to do 

 
Posted : 23rd September 2025 4:10 pm
 johhnyuk
(@wbr9jcpn3y)
Posts: 133
 

I would take the break if possible and try to leave the gambler until I see some improvements from his side.Us gamblers are often very selfish you don't see nobody else around you if you love them or not once you're a gambling addict nothing around you existing no more.

If he doesn't want to stop gambling you could just be wasting years of your life which could be full of pain,lies and constant money issues.

 

I am sorry you're going through this

 

This post was modified 8 months ago by Forum admin
 
Posted : 24th September 2025 2:36 pm
 Ayana
(@efhaq547nr)
Posts: 3
 
 
 
That sounds like an incredibly painful and exhausting situation, and it’s completely understandable that you feel torn between wanting to help your partner and needing to protect your own wellbeing. Addiction often brings deep cycles of guilt, withdrawal, and denial — and while you can encourage and support him, lasting change really does have to come from him. Right now, it might help to focus on keeping yourself and your daughter emotionally and financially safe. You could reach out to GamCare (0808 8020 133) or Alcohol Change UK for confidential advice, and Relate or Mind can offer counselling for partners affected by addiction. You’re not alone in this — support for you matters just as much as help for him, and setting boundaries doesn’t mean you’re giving up; it means you’re protecting yourself and your child while still holding space for him to seek recovery.
 
Posted : 16th October 2025 12:09 pm
 Haley14
(@42fkjc897o)
Posts: 4
Topic starter
 

Thanks so much to both of you for your replies. Sorry for not replying sooner, I have been at my wits end with it all and the continuous cycle of lies. I think that if he doesn't get any help soon I will look to take a break from the relationship as it's really affecting my happiness and well being and I will have failed my daughter if I don't look after myself too. I hope he goes back to counselling soon and starts to get the help he needs, but as you stated he has to be willing to help himself and make the changes. I do not want to waste anymore of my life if he doesn't get help. Thank you 

 
Posted : 4th November 2025 9:36 pm
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