I think I've had enough and want out. We are married with kids and I'm exhausted enough looking after them without having to help my husband through whatever he has to go through. I only discovered he's been secretly gambling on his phone by accident a few days ago. Turns out he's spent 5k in a month and I often don't have enough money for food shopping. But I guess everyone will think I'm the bad guy if I don't help him.
I've just replied to your other thread but I feel exactly the same. I only had my son 6 weeks ago and my daughter is only 1 so I have enough on my plate without his gambling adding to that. We also have no money for food this week (thank god I have a credit card though) but I feel lost at where to even start as he admits he has a problem but wont accept that he needs help. He says he can stop on his own but this has been going on for us for 6 months and its like listening to a broken record.
Has your husband ever done anything like this before? Is there anything that could have triggered it, any stresses that maybe you could get to the bottom of? Do you think he'd be willing to get help?
Hi
Just read both your posts.
Take it from someone who knows and has the scars to prove it.
Get out now. No one will blame you. You can't fix your partners that they have to do themselves.
Save your self and your children before it takes hold of you too.
If I'd have done it the first year or so I was in your position I wouldn't be here now. I put up with so much and each year the kids grew older and saw more til it affected them too.
Sounds harsh but that's the reality of it. Gambling sucks the life out of everyone not just the gambler x
Thanks all. I had a shock yesterday when I finally found out what we/he owes his parents. It's a huge amount of money. Massive. He lied about it at first of course but then I got his mum to tell me face to face.
Yesterday he was all promises about getting help etc but today he's now starting to slip and I can tell he now thinks he can do it himself. What a surprise! He's angry one minute and depressed the next. It's just so text book but he obviously can't see that.
He has gambled on and off for most of his adult life I think. He stole from his brother who was saving to go travelling only to find all his savings were gone. All of it had gone on fruit machines I think. He once had a deposit for a flat with an ex and he spent it all in the bookies. His family even put a reward out for the missing envelope that had dropped out of his bag! He seems to think that every time he goes too far with something he won't do it again - first he stopped fruit machines, then betting shops, and I recently busted him spending in a casino so he stopped that. So now it's online poker. What will it be next?
I don't think I'm ready to give up just yet - I know I should but I feel I owe it to my little ones to maybe grow up with their daddy. I am going to set myself the date of 30 September. If he hasn't been to the docs and ga by then he has to leave. Is that realistic or am I just living in dream land?
Thanks again. Xx
My boyfriend also gambles through his phone with *********** ... I found out this password and saw he won over $600 in a game and lost it all within few hours .. When he knew he owed me money .... I'm so disgusted with him ....
Got an image in my head for nine months and it was my wife
crying in despair for my stupid and long addiction,she decided to tell everyone about my problem ,family ,my children, friends ,neighbors,it was horrific for her it was drastic and decisive for me, i went for treatment with therapists and i stopped everything , (i had to learn how to walk again),she came with me for a self exclusion to all bet shops in a 10 miles radium,more then 200 shops.all them got my picture,i gave her all the cash cards ,and money only 3 pounds in a day for breakfast and that's it,i still do my routines and nothing changed in my probation about money or whatsoever and we are still together because we got a love of 24 years old and she knows that i am a great father and great friend if not this wouldn't be possible .gambling its like a disease that starts in your brain like an huge party with all the great brilliance lights and music sounds saying that you are winning and that you are a winner that is remarkable what you are achieving and then it works out...but the opposite is quite like going to extremes making you feel sick,depressed in a war that you can not win and cause its a disease and you feel embarrassed to talk about it gets worst and so its like living in a edge that you cannot cope with clarity ,that's a massive blow when you start seeing where you were before ,you just want to kick yourself and give back all you lost to your loved ones...and that's what im doing now...but i do not trust myself yet,time to time i see myself having a look in races on tv and listening about commentators talking this and that,,,so i ensure you,no day is normal day with a gambler in your life...don't trust
us and if possible do not live with us.sorry
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