I gambled for the first time in my life this month, and have learned quickly, albeit too late, that I'm highly addicted to it. I got bored and registered on an online gambling site, depositing £20, but inevitably lost it and then frequented the site throughout the month. I won and lost small amounts throughout the month but earlier tonight I won a few successive hands on blackjack and got increasingly reckless. I had never experienced a rush quite like it before and withdrew my cash, feeling like a champ. For the next 20 minutes I sat biting my nails and was quickly back on the site before I knew it, canceling my withdrawal and playing again. I completely lost all my sense in a blur of adrenaline, anger, and then panic, and lost the money before depositing even more, and more, and more... until I had spent around £1100. I'm absolutely disgusted with myself; I'm a 22-year-old student working part time in a supermarket, so this is not money I can really afford to throw around.
I'm doing my best to remain positive: I'm stopping for good and viewing my large loss tonight as a harsh lesson and wake up call. Reading the posts here has helped comfort me and feel less alone, and I'm sure I'll need help fighting urges I've conceded to in the past month, but hopefully, this is where my short and costly foray into gambling ends.
Well done for posting, and realising so quickly that what you have done. You have probably acted out of character and this is how the addiction can control you.
What I can tell you is please dont think about the money you have lost. Its gone. Please dont be tempted to go back on the sites and try and get it back - it would be the worse thing you could ever do. You wont win, and even if you do you will gamble it all back.
Be proud of yourself for joining the forum and being so honest.
Address the boredom issue as that is where this has stemmed from. Let us know how it goes!
jo999 wrote:
Well done for posting, and realising so quickly that what you have done. You have probably acted out of character and this is how the addiction can control you.
What I can tell you is please dont think about the money you have lost. Its gone. Please dont be tempted to go back on the sites and try and get it back - it would be the worse thing you could ever do. You wont win, and even if you do you will gamble it all back.
Be proud of yourself for joining the forum and being so honest.
Address the boredom issue as that is where this has stemmed from. Let us know how it goes!
Thank you for the reply and kind words of advice. It's mental how tempting the urges are: After my meltdown last night I swore never again, yet during work I found thoughts creeping into my head that one big lucky gamble could net me back my losses and that'd be that; as if it never happened. As you say, however, this is not reality, and even if I did win it back it'd just be an excuse for me to gamble and inevitably lose even more money. I'm going to take it one day at a time from now, and hopefully, in the coming months, I'll work back what I lost through hard work and put this firmly in the past. One day down so far.
Hi Antics,
reading your story takes me back to the first significant loss that I had playing online roulette. I was unemployed at the time and it was 700 pounds. It seemed like a whole hell of a lot to me at the time and I stayed up that night thinking of how I was going to get it back. I lost yet more in the process of chasing it, until I came to the absurd conclusion thi at I could win it all back if I just upped my stakes. It was a bit like getting sucked further and further into quicksand. In the end, I gambled away my entire redundancy money chasing that 700 quid, well into the tens of thousands of pounds. Luckily, I found another job in the nick of time, but I was still determined to get it all back. Here I am five years on, hundreds of thousands out of pocket and battling with an entrenched addiction. If I were you, I would let it go, no matter how gouged out you may feel. Turn around and get back onto solid ground and thank your lucky stars that you didn't chase it across the quicksand. All the best to you mate
TheHappyCamel wrote:
Hi Antics,
reading your story takes me back to the first significant loss that I had playing online roulette. I was unemployed at the time and it was 700 pounds. It seemed like a whole hell of a lot to me at the time and I stayed up that night thinking of how I was going to get it back. I lost yet more in the process of chasing it, until I came to the absurd conclusion thi at I could win it all back if I just upped my stakes. It was a bit like getting sucked further and further into quicksand. In the end, I gambled away my entire redundancy money chasing that 700 quid, well into the tens of thousands of pounds. Luckily, I found another job in the nick of time, but I was still determined to get it all back. Here I am five years on, hundreds of thousands out of pocket and battling with an entrenched addiction. If I were you, I would let it go, no matter how gouged out you may feel. Turn around and get back onto solid ground and thank your lucky stars that you didn't chase it across the quicksand. All the best to you mate
Cheers for sharing happy camel. I'm doing my best to follow yours and others advice, but gave in to urges to gamble in the last week. I got paid last week and told myself last month was just a one off, that I could gamble recreationally, and deposit ВЈ20 a month and no more. What an absolute tool I am. Ended up on a winning streak before withdrawing and then periodically cancelling my withdrawal until I had gambled the winnings away and was depositing more to chase my losses. Ended up about ВЈ150 down after all was said and done and had to channel some serious willpower to stop myself from depositing another £150 in a desperate bid to win it back. In reality i'd probably just have lost the cash instantly or more worryingly deposited more and more like I did before. Luckily I came to my senses, self excluded myself, and then downloaded software blocking all gambling sites. 3 days later I'm feeling the urges again but determined to stop for good now.
You are young my friend, I wish I was as mature as you on your age and look into the eyes of my problems and confront them.
Anyway, older or younger, is even the time to learn a lesson. Im on this forum for only two days but I already feel a better person. Thats because I see how people here are intelligent, sensible and brave. I dont think Im weak anymore cause I have a problem with betting: I feel the opposite, I feel strong because I can be honest to myself, admit the problem and try to tackle it. Keep us updated, pal.
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