Bring it on....Im ready

Hello (Again)

I'm by no means new here, and yes ive still been playing that crazy game roulette, The funny thing is, i've not suffered any major losses lately, but i've now decided i really need to kick this habbit once & for all, while i still have money in the bank, all those new accounts i opened so i could get my online roulette fix have now been closed, i don't actually think there are many more sites out there that i could sign up to, seem to have been there and done most of them, what a fool eh? I sometimes sit back and think, i bet these sites love me, keep pumping my hard earned cash into them!! the jokes on us gamblers really isn't it? 🙁

Im soooooo careful with money in everday day life, i won't spend over and beyond my means, i shop around for a bargain, if im out food shopping, and there is something we don't desperately need that week i won't buy it, i will always shop around for a bargain, i make sure we are getting good value for money, my other half sometimes even calls me tight! (if only he knew about my addiction)

It's been a few years dealing with this addiction now, and i know things could be so much worse (this can happen though if i don't stop now) i have however been to hell & back a few times while dealing with this addiction, at one point i had debts of over 14k, back then i really was in a bad place, couldn't sleep, or anything, but even being in that much debt at the time, it didn't stop me keeping playing the stupid game, someone up there was looking over me one day and got me out of that mess owing all that money. Surely you would think, stop now, you got lucky, it's not going to happen again. Did i stop?? ermm no, because i'm a compulsive gambler and i really don't know whats good for me.

So after that big win which sorted me out big time, i carried on playing, the stakes where getting higher and higher each time, the debt was mounting up again, the winning seems to be the worst part for me, If i get that big win (which i have had a couple of times) it makes me worse, i keep going, i get greedy i want more, i do usually manage to withdraw, but as quick as it hits my account my depositing again, fool?? yes im the fool.

But hey, here's to my new life, i know ive said this before and feel abit daft saying it again, but im done with gambling now, i want the new year to be the start of my new life, so if i quit now, i'll have a fair few days clocked up under my belt when the new year starts.And also while im debt free my other half never needs to find out about the double life ive been leading the past few years. Onwards and upwards, bring on the year 2015!!

Any advice for keeping me strong is much appreciated, i know there will be days where the urges are immense but i need to overcome this, so when i get the urge, im going to find something else to occupy my mind.

I cannot go into detail but i am unable to use blocking software on my computer , but like i said i think im self excluded with most of the companies out there.

Good day everyone, stay strong, together with support we can beat this!!