Many see me as a normal bloke, that has a great job, wife, kids & home, yet for 10 years I have battled this addiction that stole my soul. A constant battle of forcing a smile and trying to hold a conversation when all I am thinking about is a bet or a 4 figure loss.Â
The anxiety, sleepless nights, the hair loss and health issues all caused by this addiction. In many ways I now think to myself how do I still have a roof above my head, how am I not homeless, jobless and have lost my wife and kids. Maybe in February this year I had that crossroad moment between losing everything and everyone or start the journey I am still on today.Â
Do I miss having a football bet….yes,  could I still open a dodgy European betting site today….yes. Could I somehow still borrow on a credit card…..yes. However something inside me changed on February 13th, the 250k losses over 10 years of being an addict had caught up with me. I was disgusted with myself and needed to make a change. The constant cycle of borrow, lose, borrow, lose over all these years, it was like I was in a trance or a dream. A robotic cycle of self destruction each and every day.Â
I can see why and how some people just can never find a way out, I class myself as one of the lucky ones. I had to break the cycle, I had to WANT to break the cycle and I did.Â
I have over 40k of debt left, the road ahead is a hard long one, but as I approach half a year gamble free, I certainly know it’s better now than it would be if I was gambling.Â
For everyone with a serious addiction like me, please stop now before you reach a point I got to. Reach out for help if you can’t do it alone, put every ounce of effort in otherwise you will never beat the devil. Life does get better, I have my personality back, I can smile without forcing it, I can sleep at night.Â
Stay disciplined and dedicated and you can beat this. Stay strong and listen to the regular people that take time out of there day to reply and post on here. They are the people to look up to and take advice from. Without these people I wouldn’t remain disciplined and focused to beat this.Â
Tazman, Weirdfish, G100, PinkLady the list of great people goes on.Â
Together we can beat this Â
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Hi,
Your post made me smile in hope that I can also feel the same as you someday soon! Today was the day I joined here and actually saying out loud for the first time ever I have a problem.Â
I have a similar amount of debt to you and I think that's the hardest part, knowing that it will take me years to pay this off before I can finally be free from it all. I need to change it into a positive and that the figure won't get bigger at least if I stop 😊Â
HayleyÂ
King u are doing amazing and a true example how change can be made my advice to u keep doing what u are doing and once u get towards the end goal which is debt free continue on this journey thats when the second test begins i made the major mistake and few others have done the same thing never test this addiction the beast can be contained but never beaten u will get their and i agree until u want to actually want to stop gambling thats when u are successful i know if i really wanted to gamble i can find a way even with the blocks however i need to find ways of coping and not giving into temptation i know i am the problem so i shouldnt get myself in a situation where i put myself at risk knowing thid is what made my recovery more affective and getting myself occupied reduces gambling thoughts keep doing what u are doing u will get their seeing other people improving is what guve me happiness now i wouldnt wish this illness on my worst enemy
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 great post King, it was as if I was writing that myself.
Stay strong and focus on the positive things in life. I often battle with the debts and the thought of going back to gambling but the thoughts of that dark, lonely place stop me every time. I come on here and read stories like yours that inspired me and encourage me to keep going.Â
It’s certainly not easy but that end goal will be so worth it.
G
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