First step taken today, just want normality back in my life.

My my thought I was on my own, that I was f:;@& up in the head, sought help today waiting for my call from gamblers anon, hope it will help, praying it will help, needs to be like America and ban them.

Online gambling is a killer mate and it was one of my vices! Far too easy.

I remember years ago a guy on here said his laptop cost him around 90,000 , he sort of joked as thats the ammount he gambled on it.

It sound like your emotionally all over the place , this is normal, I hope you got that phone call, it will help to arrange counselling, whether it be online, over the phone or face to face.

Put blocks in place, smashing your laptop is extreme but if it works go far it.

Theres blockers like K9, gamblock (i've used both and are v good) and betfilter.

Its rough at the start but things will get better , time is a great healer.

I've found counselling a great help, try and find out why you gamble, work out a plan and get your life back in track.

Try a recovery diary as well.

Theres loads of help out there if you want it. Wish you all the best.

gavin

Thanks, Gavin did not realise so many people are in the grip of gambling, it's bad but I feel positive, went for a meal with my other half today, not done that for so long, makes you think, money for gambling but not for fun. Gonna do it.

Saca

Stay strong mate.

Ive often wanted to smash up my laptop but closest I got to smashing anything up was my mobile.

I had an argument with my to be wife about using my mobile to bet. I just snapped and smashed it on the floor but it survived.

I still never learnt but 4 months later I'm here successfully completed 8 days of recovery.

Keep reading on here and you'll eventually accept gambling is necer a way to make money and will only bring sadness to your life.

Hope to keep in contact with you on your journey.

Mba

Thanks MBA for your words, iPad is not the same as laptop, but feel bad about it, smashing it up but 700 quid in an hour and a half sickened me, I just threw it across the room, made me realise this is not normal behaviour. Work in a casino so I am around gambling all the time. Gonna be tough, but I a determined to succeed I want my old self back, cheers and thanks again.

Day 2 coming up to the time I usually start gambling , partner suggested going for a walk or drive, going for a walk clear my head. Off for a walk. Feeling bored , habbits eh hard to break but I refuse to give in.

You're trying hard mate. Hope you succeeded tonight. It does get easier and its all worth it.

Mba

I succeeded did not give in went for a walk came home and started reading a book, going bed early again out tomorrow, look forward to that, evenings are the worst.

got a dilemma, it occurred to me yesterday that when I cancelled my account with whatever site I had, I had 340 quid in which I did not withdraw, I got an email from them today saying that I had money in credit, in order to withdraw I had to reactivate my account in order to withdraw, yes I want the cash but feel I will play it if I reopen the account, haven't replied yet, getting those feelings I might win, but I know the outcome already, I will lose in the end. I think ill just tell them to keep it and selfexclude.

emailed them, told them to keep it and self exclude me. felt strange doing that but I know I would have played it.